Dude: so what's your point

Dasch: that you sneaked out

Dude: how is it sneak out. i literally walked out.

Dasch: no there was something sketchy about it.

Dude: what should i have done to not make it seem sneak out.

Dasch: you were all dressed in black clothing.

Dude: should I have worn white then?

Dasch: it was getting dark at night and you wore black.

Dude: what does that have anything to do with being sneaky?

Dasch: well, wearing dark makes you less visible, it's like a camouflage.

Dude: you are overanalyzing

Dasch: well, so far, you have been defensive about it. then can you answer this? where did you go?

Dude: outside

Dasch: outside where

Dude: outside somewhere

Dasch: outside somewhere where

Dude: outside somewhere that's not home.

Dasch: see, you are covering up everything. this is what being sneaky is about.

Dude: i do not think you have authority to demand my whereabouts. you are not FBI or CIA agent.

Dasch: you wouldn't know if i were. that's the whole point of being FBI or CIA agent. 

Dude: well, i guess i am also one too then. think about it. i was wearing all black and sneaked out last night. i was on a secret mission.

Dasch: why would FBI or CIA hire two agents unaware of each other in the same location.

Dude: i don't know maybe we are supposed to not know. you have your mission and i have my mission.

Dasch: but then if that were the case, why would you reveal that you are an agent? that's so unprofessional.

Dude: well, i guess i'm still in a training phase.

Dasch: if that's the case, you failed miserably since i caught you sneaking out last night wearing dark clothes.

Dude: my mission isn't to avoid your surveilance.

Dasch: you better confess where you have been. otherwise, this will go up on my report.

Dude: well, your interrogation doesn't seem to work very well on me.

Dasch: you are about raise the bar, i do not want to torture you.

Dude: torture? you puny little creature. you are up against someone who is much stronger physically. i am so scared little doggy.

Dasch: if words don't suffice, i may have to resort to extreme measures in my back pocket.

Dude: you don't even have a pocket. all you have is little brown ball sac. it's so small. i don't think you can afford anything more.

Dasch: do you know what metaphor is? it's not a literal back pocket. you dumbass. 

Dude: whatever backpocket it is, i don't see any of it. what is there to be scared of?

Dasch: i'm not here to fool around, you see? the more bullshit you pull, the deeper your grave will be.

Dude: well i will make sure you get buried next to me. you shall accompany me.

Dasch: no, you are going alone. just like we were born separately. your death is yours. don't put me in that package.

Dude: think about this, if you are agent and you are assigned to track me down, wouldn't there be another agent who is tracking you as well?

Dasch: so you are playing that card? turning me against my own agency? do you still think this is some kind of joke? your vital sign depends on me.

Dude: my heart has never beat so regularly. in fact, i just realized my heart was functioning well.

Dasch: enjoy while that lasts.

Dude: you better watch yours too. i am pretty sure that you will be retired once my time comes to an end.

Dasch: you are trying to manipulate me. i am not being watched. you are trying to infiltrate into my psyche to which you have no access.

Dude: just think about it. when's the last time you had an encounter with your agency?

Dasch: that's confidential. and your question ends here. i am the one in authority. how dare you try to topple me.

Dude: when is the last time you got your paycheck from the agency?

Dasch: it's all in the contract and this is none of your concern. keep talking, your longevity will shorten.

Dude: habalalala abracadabra scrambled egg bacon cheese fry

Dasch: pray that they will be your last meal before execution.

Dude: i can't wait. my mouth is already watering. what happens i eat my meal so slow that it takes forever?

Dasch: you can ask your executioner.

Dude: haha. so you can't even answer that. i wonder you really know what you have signed up for and what you are up against.

Dasch: my loyalty and tie with myh agency are sealed airtight.

Dude: do you think it is all coincidence that you were sent to our family and you were assigned to watch over its family member?

Dasch: what are you getting at.

Dude: little doggy. think. we paid to bring you here. where do you think that money went to?

Dasch: the pet shop and my agency has no relevance whatsoever. This is an outrageous nonsense.

Dude: you were a tiny little 4 months crawler crying for more petfood. what a desperate toddler you were. mouth salivating to the sound of crumples of packages. being raised according to our meal schedule and routine.

Dasch: ...

Dude: oh has interrogation ended early? what's this silence?

Dasch runs out of the room. Dude chuckles.

Dude: ahahaha ahahahaha poor little thing ahahahahahaha my loyal watchdog hahahahaha