I desperately reached for the handle on the door, it was barely within my grasp before his hand closed behind my neck from behind as he slammed my frail body against the door I was running towards.

My head and chest hit the door the hardest leaving me gasping hard for air as darkness swam in my vision. My exhale came out as a cry before he pulled me back and let me fall.

“BEHAVE, YOU FUCKING BITCH!” He screamed in my face as he kicked my side. “I’ll fucking kill you, you hear me? Pull that shit again I swear to all hell, I’ll beat you nearly to death. You want a repeat of last time huh?” He kicked me again.

“Noo-oh.” I cried out.

“You’re acting like you do. Wipe your face go sit your ass on that bed and do what you’re told.”

I nodded as I stood up on shaking legs. I wobbled to the bed, falling on to it as I wiped the tears off my face.

Reid observed me from afar. He sighed in disappointment when I couldn’t get my crying under control, and spoke to the man beside him, “**************” He locked eyes with me again before he smiled.

(Rest of the dream on Wattpad.)

A scream of pure agony rang through the room making me shoot up and out of bed. I was quick to turn the light on just in time to see Blue, with wide, wild eyes, stumble out of bed and fall onto his hands and knees, vomiting onto the floor beneath him until all he could do was dry heave between panicked breaths.

I wasted no time running to his side to pull the longer pieces of his hair out of his face. But as soon as the tip of my finger grazed his skin, he flinched hard recoiling into the corner of the room with his arms in front of his scrunched face.

“N-no, no, no, no. I-I don’t want it. I d-don’t. Don’t.” He spoke between hard gasping breaths.

I was worried he’d pass out from hyperventilating. “Blue, it’s me. It’s West. You need to calm down and breathe.”

He made no moves like he heard me so I got a little closer, “Blue. Blue, listen to me!”

Nothing.

“Samuel!!” I yelled.

He flinched at his name and went deathly still, besides the movement of his chest rapidly rising and falling.

“Breath. You’re okay. Just breathe. Nothings going to hurt you.”

“Forgive me, please. Please, I’m sorry. I’ll be good. I can be good.”

I made a noise of pain as I got closer, “Blue, you had a bad dream, bud. You’re safe.” I pleaded with the boy.

Blue let his eyes slowly open, they shot around the room assessing the area he was in before they locked onto me.

“Huh?” The small boy said, calming down significantly.

“You had a bad dream,” I said.

Blue stretched out of his scrunched position and looked around the room, cringing at the vomit on the floor. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “I… did?”

I blinked, “you don’t remember?”

Blue made a face like he was focusing really hard on something before he suddenly looked faint, “I…don’t know… my heads a little…. Foggy.” He swayed where he sat making me panic. I moved to his side, and cradled him in my arms before I picked him up and set him on the bed. He stared dazedly up at me.

“It’s alright, Blue. Get some more rest. I’ll watch over you.”

Blue nodded before he let his eyelids slowly close. Immediately soft snores sounded from him.

I plopped on the bed with a deep sigh and let my head fall into my hands.

This needs to end.

He needs help.

After tomorrow I’ll focus on getting him doctors.

Yes.

I lied down next to the boy.

After tomorrow.

🌊🌊🌊

I don’t remember anything from last night but West said I had a nightmare. It must have been pretty bad because he looked shaken this morning and was flashing me sad eyes whenever he thought I wasn’t looking.

I feel bad I’m worrying him.

Today West’s on a talk show which he seemed really excited about. He’s wanted to be on here since he was a little kid and I heard him prepping for possible questions about the movie and his character which I know he’s looking forward to talking about.

I was sat on an end seat all the way to the right on the second row, right next to West’s aunt who seemed to be avoiding any possible small talk with me.

I felt excitement and anticipation start to bubble up as I discreetly took in my surroundings.

A blue curtain was drawn to cover a large stage with the words, “The Milton Show,” projected in white cursive letters onto it. To the left, on a smaller stage was a jazz band playing live music. The rest of the room was set up like a classic theater. Navy blue chairs were slowly being filled as people trickled through the doors in the back.

I was mesmerized by the intricate designs on the ceiling and the decorative pillars lining the walls.

The only thing resembling a theater that I’ve ever been to was the night club.

Within minutes the theater was filled up, buzzing with quiet chatter.

Everyone went silent as the lights began to dim.

West’s manager leaned over and whispered, “it’s starting.”

I sat up, leaning slightly forward as the curtain began to lift revealing what looked like a cozy living room.

A robotic sounding voice suddenly spoke from the walls, “Ladies and Gentlemen, give it up for your host…. Milton Pheonix!”

I startled as everyone around me began to clap their hands. A sharp whistle blew out from the man sitting behind me making me whip my head around. He had a big smile on his face as he cheered. I gazed around seeing that everyone seemed to be cheering happily. I turned back in my seat and slowly brought my hands up to clap, unsure as to why just as a man in a burgundy suit stepped onto the stage, waving.

That’s not West, I thought to myself with a pout making its way on my face. I stopped clapping for this imposter.

The man flashed the audience a charming smile as he spoke, “Welcome! Welcome! To the Milton show! I’m your host Milton and tonight we have an extra special guest.” His voice seemed to be amplified but there wasn’t a microphone in sight.

“An actor who has been rapidly rising to fame this year and is starring in the most anticipated movie of the summer, please welcome…. West Klein, everybody!”

Again, people began to clap and this time I found myself easily joining in as I scooted to the edge of my seat.

West joined the man on stage, wearing, of course, a lilac suit. His curls bounced as he walked to shake Milton’s hand before they both settled onto two comfortable looking chairs.

“Thank you so much for having me on the show tonight. It’s truly an honor. I remember watching your show as a kid thinking, someday that’s going to be me,” West said.

Milton laughed, “you’re making me blush Mr. Klein! Quite the charmer you are.”

The audience laughed at that.

“Speaking of things that make us blush,” Milton reached down and pulled out two framed posters depicting West wearing a pair a grey, wet, skin-tight swimming trunks as he surfed a wave. His hair was damp and his muscled arms and chest were on display, shiny with sweat. The second poster was of a gorgeous woman I’ve never seen. She was posed lying on a beach towel in a wet white bikini that almost looked see-through. Nothing was left to the imagination in either of these pictures and it was clear what the photographer’s intentions were.

They made me feel disgusted.

The audience cheered and whistled when the posters were pulled out making a sheepish smile spread across West’s face.

Milton looked toward West with a what do you have to say for yourself  look. West just laughed quietly, covering his face.

The audience awed.

Milton spoke up, “these photos have blown up across every platform and have even made it to multiple billboards across the country! It’s dangerous because there’s one on my way to work and I get distracted and I have to… swerve and duck… it’s a disaster.” Milton does a swerving motion with his body as he explains and the room laughs again.

“Well, I’m told that my looks could kill so you ought to be careful,” West winks.

Milton fans himself as he looks at the audience and mouths, “oh my god.” Eliciting another burst of laughter from the room. “Lots of women love this photo of you, Mister Klein. And I can’t blame them. It tickles me too if you know what I mean. I mean look at those abs, ladies!”

Women in the audience cheer and whistle at that.

Looking at West I watch as he adjusts himself looking a little uncomfortable.

My skin crawls for him. I know what that feeling feels like. To be in a room full of people with all their attention on you as they objectify you in their heads.

My heart hurts for him. This isn’t what West was hoping it would be like and I know it.

Milton sets West’s poster down and brings everyone’s attention to the poster of the woman, “how do you feel working alongside America’s ideal woman, Daisy Heartstrung. In a steamy romance movie nonetheless.”

West stays professional, smiling at the question despite the obvious undertones, “well she’s certainly a joy to work with. Daisy is the kind of selfless where her first thought in the morning is, ‘how can I make someone else’s day better.’ She’s a ball of sunshine. No matter what kind of day you’re having it’s instantly better as soon as she walks in.”

The audience awes at this and I feel a sort of envy for Daisy. I wish I could bring that feeling out in West but instead I make his life harder.

“Those are very sweet words, are you sure she’s really just your co-star?” Milton pries with a charming smile on his face.

West takes it in stride, “well no….”

Everyone holds their breath, including Milton.

“She’s also become a very good friend of mine.” West flashes the audience a mischievous smile that has a cacophony of noises rising up.

“Always keeping us on the edge of our seats, West. I’m sick of you!” Milton jokes and he playfully shoves West making him laugh.

“So, for the people who don’t know, what’s High Tide all about,” Milton asks.

Finally we’re getting to stuff about the movie.

West straightens up and faces the audience, “High Tide is a captivating romance about a famous Olympic surfer and small town girl working in her father’s mechanic shop. She longs for a more adventurous life which leads her to go swimming at night. Coincidentally a charming, handsome, curly haired young fellow,” the audience giggles, “is there in case anyone may be in need of saving.” He winks at the audience.

Milton claps, “I can’t wait to see it! Ladies and Gentlemen, West Klein!”

The jazz band begins playing music as West stands up and waves. Milton and him shake hands again as the curtain begins to fall.

I furrow my eyebrows.

That’s it? Wasn’t this supposed to mainly be promo for the movie? Instead they talked about his looks and his relationships. Two things I know he doesn’t like because that’s all he’s been known for.

West’s aunt discreetly stands and urges me to as well. We quietly make our way to the side door and sneak out.

“There’s more guests that come on but I don’t have time for it.”

I nod but she doesn’t see it.

My heart aches for the disappointment West must be feeling right now.

I follow her fast stride around a bend and through a side door that leads to a long hallway with rooms. The first one labeled with West’s name.

His aunt knocks, “It’s Jane. Can we come in?”

“Yea.”

Jane turns the handle and steps in to a tired looking West who doesn’t even look up from the mirror he’s staring at. As soon as the door closes behind her she begins ranting, “how unprofessional! I mean honestly, the goddamn audacity to invite someone on the show just to tell him his abs tickle you?? Are you fucking for real? What a creep. Social media is going to tear him apart for it too. I mean it was so obviously creepy. Wasn’t it?” She turns to me and I silently nod. She rolls her eyes at me, “does he ever talk?”

West’s attention moves to us and he looks me over and then looks to Jane, and snaps “yea.” Daring her to say something else about it.

Jane stares at him for a moment before she breaks eye contact, “alright well, I’ll see you guys next time you have any obligations. Tootaloo!” She calls out before exiting the room.

West sighs and lets his head fall on the table in front of him.

I walk over to him and hesitantly give him an awkward hug.

I feel his shoulders shake as he huffs out a laugh before he turns his body toward me and wraps his arms around my waist, pressing his head into my stomach.

“I’m angry for you too.” I say.

West sighs, “It’s alright.”

I huff, “no it’s not. I know how that feels. To be up there knowing that every single person in that room is sexualizing you as they stare at you. It’s not a great feeling.”

West is quiet for a minute before he pulls away just enough to look up at me, “you’re right. it's not alright.”

Looking at West’s sad face makes my heart ache. I feel my cheeks flame in anger as I get the urge to yell at someone.

Instead I go for a quiet, “f-fuck that guy.”

Perfectly executed.

West’s eyes widen in amusement, “was that your first time saying fuck?”

“N-no.”

West laughs at me as he stands up and drags me into a playful headlock-hug.

“Thank you, Blue.”

I hum in acknowledgment.