That night had been his new beginning. A night where everything changed for him in a mere hour, he’d gotten free. At least he hoped.

His body ached and waned, the stress he’d placed on it becoming prominent. The wind wasn’t helping, sending every drop of rain from the storm directly at him. His hair stuck to his face, as tears fell from his eyes.

The vessel lurched with the waves, gusts of wind billowing around him. They muffled the cries and screams of his anguish as he collapsed onto his knees. His hands were stained with blood of those he barely knew. Faces he’d seen maybe once, twice even? The people who he’d craved to hurt the most, not among them.

His face reflected back at him in a small puddle formed on the ship’s quarterdeck. A trail of crimson trailing from his lip to his chin. Dried blood stuck pieces of his hair in place on his face. He hadn’t seen himself in so many years, he couldn’t even recognize the face that stared back at him. The boy he had been when this all started, had not even a trace left behind. How long has it been? All time had been stripped from him.

He reached out to the reflection, his sharp nails scratching at the water. That wasn’t him, couldn’t be him. There was no way for him to accept it then.

The hatred that burned within him was all encompassing. If only I’d been stronger. If only I’d tried to escape sooner. His thoughts plagued him. Maybe then…

He could’ve been happy.

Varian shoots up with a jolt, clutching the bandana around his neck. He is covered in a cold sweat, his jet black hair obscuring his vision partially. His breath is uneven and staggering whilst his body is trembling. That dream again. Sleep is never a pleasant experience, always leaving dark circles beneath his eyes. That bandanna is the reminder that always grounds him.

Varian steadies himself, that memory is a decade old but it haunts him nonetheless. The guilt that coils itself in his stomach, a constant. He pulls his bedding to the side before pulling himself from them to his feet.

He reaches beside his bedside to the stool nearby to grab a tie, his hair unruly and unkempt. His finger brushes through the waves of it, catching on every knot within. The mere length of it being a burden every night, falling just below his collar. He ties it back with the assistance of a mirror just behind the stool. 

His eyes stare back at him, an unnatural yellow serving as a permanent reminder that he is no longer human.

He had not been for a very long time.

Tearing his gaze from the mirror, he wanders to grab his gloves, he casts a glance at his hands. Another thing to cover.

The room sways to the tide. It is one of the only things that soothed Varian, they had always been there even before… 

He shakes his head, thinking of such times would only make him weak.

“Azeral,” he calls as he exits the room and the hall beyond it out onto the deck. No moonlight could be seen, blocked by dark clouds. His gaze scans the deck looking for the familiar figure in the darkness of which he was accustomed.

A hand places itself on his shoulder from behind drawing tension into Varian’s back, “Finally awake?”

Varian turns to face him, his body relaxing at the familiar face. “Yes, how are the preparations?”

“All work focused, I wish you’d loosen up from time to time,” Azeral withdraws their hand, sporting a small grin. “Marquette has finally gotten a location on it.”

“And?”

Azeral’s face falls, their eyes dropping to the ground, “we may be too late.”

Fury bubbles up in Varian’s throat as his teeth clench, “How far?” Azeral hesitates to answer, a wave of gloom encapsulating their face. Varian grabs Azeral’s shoulders, his sharp nails digging into them,“HOW FAR AZERAL?” Azeral winces, he could smell the blood he drew. His eyes grow wide before dropping his hands by his sides, regret stinging his insides.

“Varian I-” They reach a hand out before pulling it back, Varian’s eyes cast to the ground, teeth still clenching. “I’ll go ahead, I’ll go off course on my own to find it.”

Varian snarls, “Don’t be foolish.”

“What’s foolish is wasting time, I’ll wake Jackal to take over my duties for now,” Azeral turns their back to Varian heading towards where the rest of the crew slept.

Varian folds his arms, “Fine, but don’t blame any injuries on me.” Azeral disappears into the crew quarters without another word. 

He glances down at his gloves, and curses under his breath. His nails had torn holes through them, his temper is growing worse these days. Everytime bad news trailed him, his composure would slip just like it had this time. Damn it. Varian pounds his fist against the wall next to him.

A small pain emerges on his hand but he pays it no mind. He still had to pay a visit to the stowaway, figure out what to do with him. A stinging sensation hits his head, his head feeling suddenly foggy, shit.

When was the last time he drank blood again?

Doesn’t matter, Varian tells himself. He could go longer.

He thought back to the encounter he’d had with the stowaway. Even when the idiot's life was in direct danger.

“Did I hurt your feelings, Varian?” The stowaways' words replayed in his head along with idiotic smirk that splayed on his face. Varian clenches his teeth again at the memory, more questions for the stowaway propped up as he recalled it. How did the fool even know his name? What else did he know?

He adjusts his gloves and composes himself before strolling over to the door with the staircase waiting behind it. A frigid air greets him as he takes the steps down. It is surprisingly silent for how the stowaway had acted before. But Varian knows he is still there, the familiar oder of his blood still lingering in the air.

The smell isn’t as pungent this time, Howl must’ve given the fool some food as Varian told him to. 

As he rounds the final stair, he looks to the center of the room where no one resides. He sighs, placing a hand on his hip. “I know you’re still here fool, I can smell you.”

Just as he speaks, the smell grows closer as the stowaway tries to knock him off his feet by lunging at him from the right side of the wall towards the staircase opening but Varian simply bends his knees to elbow the fool in the stomach. The stowaway clutches his stomach, coughing as he reels back. His eyes were full of visceral hatred.

“Now let’s try this again,” his tone is cold and dark. “Fighting like this is such a waste of energy don’t you think?”

The stowaways eyes narrow, hand still clutching his stomach, “Excuse me for not desiring to stay here.”

“You chose to sneak here in the first place, and you blame me for reacting in kind? Truly ridiculous,” he shakes his head. “Should I leave you here another night or would you rather get this over with now?” He folds his arms and leans against the arch of the staircase.

The stowaway keeps his eyes training on Varian, his mouth twisted in a scowl, “Fine.”

“Good, now why did you sneak onto my ship?” The stowaways' eyes glance around the room, looking as if to find something. “I am not known for my patience.”

“I was looking for someone, but I seem to have taken a wrong turn.” The stowaway’s eyes dart around, there is no way he is telling the truth and Varian knows as much.

“Who?” The stowaway shifts a bit, clearly uncomfortable but his eyes remain narrowed and focused on Varian. “Whoever it is, maybe I could point you in the right direction.”

The tension in the stowaways muscles slips slightly with eyes widening, “Why would you do that?” 

Varian’s brows furrow. “My reasons are none of your concern.”

“Of course they are, the blood fiend helping someone?” Varian twitches at the nickname. “That’s unheard of.”

“So you know of me, and here I thought I’d kept myself so well hidden,” he glares at the stowaway. “Tell me, who is it that you’re searching for?” By the way the stowaway had addressed him earlier, it made sense the fool knew who he was, or at least the mockery of the title linked to him.

However, he’d been so careful to maintain merely a name without a face attached, yet this fool knew it was him with ease. Even if he were to help this stowaway, who’s to say he wouldn’t place a target on Varian’s back once let go? Varian can’t guarantee his anonymity would stay in tack.

“Why should I trust you to ‘help’? You threatened to feed me to the sirens, how should I know that this isn’t some trick to make me end up like all those you’ve run into in the past?” The stowaway barks.

Varian scowls, “You can’t, nor do I want your trust.” He steps closer to the stowaway, “I ask again, who are you looking for?”

The stowaway gulps and steps back, maintaining a cold expression. “Explain something to me-”

“You are on my ship, in my hold, under my discretion. And you dare try to question me after you snuck aboard? Preposterous,” Varian’s teeth clench. 

The stowaway doesn’t waiver, “Why do you kill them? You hesitated to kill me, what makes me different, I’d say I was worse, you don’t even know them.” Idiotic piece of- anger boils in his blood. He thinks he knows so much, how arrogant.

Varian takes a deep breath to quell his anger, if he were to get any info from this idiot, force wasn’t going to work. “You want to know why?” The stowaway nods. “Fine, but I expect something in exchange.”