My face twitch as I open my eyes. Things are as it always have been; my body is enveloped by an ever expanding darkness, and sensations are lost upon my body. My breathing continues, yet sometimes I wish it would just stop so that everything would just fade away to nothingness. Alas, my wishes were never granted; why would it change now? And thus, I resign my body to this never ending weightlessness, wishing for the coming of the day where my suffering may finally end.

I rouse from my sleep as small rays of sunlight pass through my curtain and land on my eyes. The world seems to be silent as I try to collect my consciousness, only to find my head feeling heavier than usual. I lift my body to a sitting position and stay seated on top of the bed for a few minutes before I finally feel awake enough a few minutes later. 

"Heavy..." I murmur. Even though some time has passed, my head feels as heavy as when I first woke up, and my mind is still as cloudy. 

I reach for my phone to check for the time, and it takes a few seconds for me to register the fact that I woke up way later than I was supposed to, and I am, by all accounts and purposes, late for school. I let out a sigh before unlocking my phone and making a call to the homeroom teacher. Not long afterwards, the connecting tone is interrupted by a sudden sound of light static.

"Hello, Kusakabe. Before you begin, where were you this morning?" Sasaki's voice is heard the moment the call connects.

"Good morning, teach. Sorry, I just woke up and I'm not feeling too good, so I won't be coming to school today," I reply.

"Is that so? Is your parents aware of this?"

"I'll tell them after this."

"Hmm. Okay then, if you say so. Get well soon," Sasaki replies before cutting the call. I could only sit there in silence while pondering is it really alright to just finish the call like that, but in the end decided that if he says it's fine then it should be fine.

As I put my phone back on top of the bedside table, I hear footsteps going up the stairs, which eventually stops in front of my room. Not long after, my door knob twists and the door swings open, and in front of it stands my mother.

"Yuu? You're still here? I thought you went to school?" She asks, seemingly confused.

"Good morning, mom. I just woke up," I reply as a matter of factly. "Rather, what makes you think I've gone to school?"

"It's just, it was so quiet when I woke up this morning, you know? Usually you make a lot of noise when you're about to wake up, so I assumed you just went earlier today," she replies, still sounding a bit confused. "Are you feeling better?"

"Well... Maybe just a bit," I reply, trying to sound as neutral as possible.

"I see. That's good to hear," Mom replies while showing a thin smile. "So I assume you're not going to school today? Seeing that you're still here."

"I think so."

"Are you going to stay home?"

"I'm not sure yet. Do you mind if I go outside for a bit later?"

"I don't mind," Mom replies while shaking her head, "as long as you don't do this too often."

"I'll try not to. Thanks, mom," I reply as the conversation ends with mom heading back down the stairs. I extend my gaze towards the place where mom stood just seconds earlier.

"Why do I feel so... hollow?" I mumble, experiencing a new feeling that I haven't felt before. "Is this the effect of the medicine?" I ponder. 

"Anyhow, I better do something for the day. It's a rare day off after all," I sigh as the thought grows in my head. I grab my smartphone and put on my hoodie, as well as my jeans, and head out of the house. The air, much like yesterday, feels cold and bites my skin, although the feeling is abated by the abundant rays of sunlight. The hovering clouds are still grey, although it is nowhere near as numerous as yesterday. I lock the doors behind me and start to walk towards the bus stop.

As the bus comes and stops, I board it and I sit down on one of the chairs. I feel myself sinking into the chair as the bus accelerates, and before long I'm on my way as the bus starts to run along the street. As stops go by, the passengers disembark one by one until I am the only one left on the bus. However, the bus continues to move towards its final destination, marching through the empty bus stops along the way. 

After some time, the announcement bell rings, and a voice can be heard from the speakers of the bus. "Next stop, Mount Kouan Entrance. This is the final stop for the bus. Please prepare to disembark. Next stop, Mount Kouan Entrance." Hearing this, I prepare myself to disembark, and I wait until the bus reaches its stop. When the wheels finally grind into a halt, the doors open, and I disembark from the bus, and I watch as the door closes and it moves to the bus stop not far away, preparing to go back to where it came from.

Turning back, a single hiking trail, covered in snow, invites me to explore. I look for a few seconds before I take a step towards the trail, before I start to immerse myself as I start to walk in the hiking trail, carefully following the route without straying even a single step. I look at the white world around me, and I listen as every step I take makes a crunching sound as the pile of snow gets compressed under my boots. I continue to walk, and before long, a cabin can be seen, a sanctuary for people who are in need of respite. I open the door and walk in, and the shop exposes itself as soon as I do. The store is deserted save for the sole keeper, and when she notices me, she smiles and nods at me.

"Welcome. Come on in." 

"Excuse me," I reply as I take off my shoes and I take a seat by the window. "May I have a cup of hot chocolate please?"

"Most certainly. Please wait for a moment." She replies, retreating to the kitchen before some clanging sound can be heard. I take a look outside the window, towards the snowy white world outside.

"I must say, it's quite uncommon for someone as young as you to be here at this day and weather." The keeper says as she approaches with my chocolate, her elderly face blossoming into a slight smile as she does.

"Thank you," I say as I take the cup of chocolate. "Well... Let's just say I'm in the middle of searching myself." I reply as I blow the cup of hot chocolate, hoping to cool it down a bit.

"Ah, that's why. I understand." The old shopkeeper nods. "It's not getting any easier for you young folks, is it? It seems like with each passing year, life just keeps getting harder and harder for everyone."

"So it seems," I reply with a smile as sincere as I can muster.

"Well, everyone have their own problems and issues. Here's to hoping that you can find a solution for yours, and that everyone can be happy once it's done." She says as she bows. "Please tell me if you need anything else." She says before she retreats back to her table. I nod back, thanking her silently before I turn my gaze back to the scenery outside of the window. 

I see the trees sway with the wind, their snow-laden branches threatening to snap with every move. Yet, with every gust of wind, some snow continues to fall, only to be replaced by the one falling from the higher branches. I look on as time continues to flow, and the constant yet vain changes keep happening to the world outside. Unlike before, I feel my head clearing up, and I feel something like a small semblance of joy infiltrating my head. As I look at the time, I down the remainder of my drink, and I bring the cup back to the keeper as I pay for my drink.

"Thank you very much."

"Thank you as well, dear. Hopefully you got some respite from your issues." She replies while smiling.

In response, I can't help but smile back as I nod at her. Putting my shoes back on, I leave the cabin back to the unforgiving world outside, the winter's wind starting to bite me as the temperature starts to drop. I start walking back down towards the bus stop, and the snow continues to crunch beneath me as I walk. As the sun starts to set, I arrive at the bus stop, and I see a bus parked, waiting for passengers before it inevitably departs empty-handed. I walk towards the bus, and it opens its doors for me, and I quickly board it and I tap my card before I take a seat. As the scheduled time arrives, the bus roars into life and it starts to make its way back to town, bringing me as its sole passenger.

I look as the bus continues to move through the dense forest area as it makes its way back into town, and before long the sun sets, bringing darkness to the scenery around me. I disembark once the bus reaches the promenade before I walk towards the shopping street. Stopping at the small ramen stall, I go in, taking a seat between the other customers. 

"Small chashu ramen, please. Extra garlic, hard noodles." I say to the cook, who replies with an energetic shout. The surrounding voices reverberates inside the store, creating the illusion that the store is way livelier than it actually is. Before long, my order arrive, and I dig in. I try to ignore the creeping sounds, and I start to feel fear inside as I feel so emotionless. I eat hastily, and I end up coughing when a strand of noodle enters the wrong pipe. 

"Oi, oi, that won't do," The cook says as he hastily gives me a glass of water. Thankful, I down it instantly, feeling my coughing subside.

"I don't know what you're experiencing, but at least try to enjoy it when you eat, alright?" He says, visibly a bit irritated before he responds to another customer. I simply nod, and I resume eating, slurping the noodles silently as the remaining seats slowly but surely becomes occupied. Out of noodles, I ask for the mini fried rice, and it comes out almost instantly. I dunk the rice inside the remaining broth before I finish everything. I pay for the meal, thank the cook, and go out to the cold winter night's air. Still feeling a bit hollow, I decide to go back home, and I quickly board the bus as it arrives at the stop.

The familiar roads and scenery feels so foreign as the bus continues to run. I start to question whether or not I'm even awake or if this is all just a dream, but the crunching sound and feel of snow as I disembark at my stop seems too real for this to be a dream. I hurrily walk home, closing the door instantly the moment I enter.

"I'm home," I say as I take off my shoes.

"Welcome back. Have you had dinner?" Mom's voice comes out from the kitchen, along with the smell of food.

"I did, I'm sorry. I didn't think I'll be home this quick. And mom? I'll be at my room." I say as I head towards the ladder, my step reverberating loudly on the stairs. I close the door behind me, and I throw myself onto the bed, foregoing shower or a bath. Suddenly feeling extremely exhausted, I down the nightmare suppressing pill before I fall asleep, my vision quickly fades into black as my consciousness wanes.