Desperation. That's what I felt. Throughout my life, every second, every drop of sweat and blood, everything I gained and lost—I have never felt as desperate as I do now. I never truly understood my will to live until my back was against the wall with no way out.

...earlier that day...

I'd already split off from Nace and Ennahon. Nace muttered something about "class rep duties," and Ennahon just gave me this unreadable look before taking off. Ennanhon also excused himself...though the way he looked at me was a bit puzzling.

Since there is a bit of time before my next class, I decided to research magic, if I am ever to survive. 

And what better way to do that? 

The Library.

I found it on the southern edge of campus. It looked… strange. Like a shard of black coal wedged into the earth, stretched and slanted like someone had kicked it sideways.

The building was made of some kind of charred darkwood, warm to the touch even from a distance.

My first thought?

Why?

It looked utterly impractical. Unbalanced. Crude. Like a giant had tried to draw a triangle and given up halfway.

Well, who am I to judge?

I went ahead and walked up the stairs leading up to the building's entrance, noticing a faint pulse of orange light at the edges of the building.

It is a piece of charcoal, after all.

However, as soon as I walked in, I was in awe.

How?

The inside feels endless—literally endless—stretching far in every direction from the ceiling to my left and right, with books flying everywhere—some even perched like real birds. 

I approached the front desk, where a young woman sat sipping tea with her pinky up, a book in her other hand.

That's when it hit me. Again, literally.

A book came hurtling out of nowhere, slamming into my nose with a wet, awful crunch. Pain exploded in my skull. Blood surged down my lips and chin. I staggered back, gasping, tasting metal. My knees hit the floor. Dizzy. Cold.

I groaned, almost cursing out loud.

I heard laughter, not loud or mean, just laughter...with the sound of paper. I looked up only to see that I am surrounded by a swarm of books flapping their pages at me. 

Now I'm on my knees, bleeding, humiliated in front of flying literature, feeling like a bug trying to understand quantum physics.

Every second I spend here reminds me I'm not just in over my head— I'm in a place that doesn't care if I drown.

And worse… It might even enjoy it. 

I forgot how cruel this game could be.

Before I could continue wallowing in my pain, a voice dispersed the books.

"Enough of that," she said. Still, I glared at her as she continued sipping tea.

I got up from my knees, "Was that necessary?" I asked her.

She looked at me, her eyes like slit, "It wasn't my own doing. The books themselves attack foreign...things stumbling upon the library."

"Things?!" 

"I am merely jesting. They attack when they feel threatened or sense negative thoughts about the library.

So this is my fault?! At the auto-attacking feature because I critiqued the design?!

"So, what can I help you with?"

"Books on magic," I said with a muffled voice as I held my bleeding nose.

"Certainly," she said as she walked back toward the front desk, "Anything specific?"

"Yes, specifically casting magic...the basics of it, please." 

She looked back at me as if I had asked her for something so ridiculous, but nevertheless, she waved her hand; a book came flying towards us at breakneck speed. I flinched, covering myself with my arms, scared that it would hit me again and actually kill me this time.

"This is the rudimentary manual for casting magic," she handed the book to me, "Anything else?"

"Uh, yes. I would also need a book on Practical Mana Applications."

Again, she waved her hand and the book came flying towards us...and again, I flinched, not as hard though.

"Here, and be sure to bring it back after you are finished with it since it might hit you if you don't."

I shuddered at the thought and made a mental note to bring it as soon as I am done with it.

Tch.

Fifth-ring my ass! Even a book could topple me. 

I'd just bring one of these books with me to defend myself from monsters next time.

...

I made my way back to the dorm rooms to study.

Opening the book about casting magic, I found out that you can't just wizz out words from your mouth, and magic comes out. Nah, it's—"Why is it so complicated?!"

I banged on my desk, crashing out from all the specific instructions on how to cast magic. 

Here's the gist:

If it's not already engraved in your body, a spell may not be cast unless you follow the rules of magic casting: 

1. Channel your mana in a specific burst of sequences that depend on the element of the spell you want to cast.

For example, a fire-attribute mana would require you to rapidly concentrate mana at a specific area where you want it to manifest, and then let it "pop"...or so the books say. 

On the contrary, casting a wind-attribute magic would require you to spread your mana thinly on where you want it to manifest and then concentrating it and "waving it"...or so the books say.

2. Casting a specific spell would require you to follow a sequence of channeling an element while simultaneously trying to manifest it in a shape you want. If you wanted to fire it, of course, that is another painstaking step of moving your manifested spell according to your will.

3. Skip steps one and two and just engrave your spell on your body instead. 

By manifesting a spell, the mana will flow in our body in a "shape" that we call a "score". This score is often transcribed into tools, or most commonly, the body.

An engraved score only needs a mana supply to work—no need for the tedious steps of channeling, manifesting, molding, and firing. It's almost like a code.

With all this information, I realized that my spell [Inventroy] has been engraved in me. If that's the case, then I should be able to use my other spells from my game avatar.

"[Dash]," I muttered and immediately regretted it as I found myself outside the building, only I was on the fifth floor. I plummeted down.

"[Float]!!" I was able to cast, suspending myself midair.

Though I remember another point in the book, you'd still have to "Fire" a spell even if it's engraved. This is because an engraved spell cannot pinpoint your enemies. 

Also, in cases of spells like [Float], "Firing" means more like directing yourself on where to go.

I tried willing myself to go down slowly, only to head straight towards a tree with orange leaves.

I shouted as I hit my head on a branch.

Another point in the book was that spells can be disrupted, either by a loss of focus or by outside interference, cutting the mana supply.

And that's precisely what happened. 

I fell to the ground. Luckily, I fell on top of dry, raked leaves, cushioning my fall.

This is gonna take a while.

...

Taking leaves out of my robe and hair, I made my way back to the campus for my next class.

Combat and Warfare.

I was confused as to why a school would teach kids about warfare, but then I remembered that, yes, they probably should. Just thinking about the wasteland south of Halueun, they should start by educating mages about the Geneva Convention--or the equivalent of that in this world. 

I mean...that was incredibly stupid of the people back then.

The class had two parts: a combat instruction and a warfare discussion. 

The first part will be held here at the colosseum I saw on the way to Aaron Leyser's office.

It seems that we're not the only class holding its session here. I see other students in robes and vests in different colors practicing martial arts and spell casting.

"Alright, people! Gather 'round!" a man with a broadsword on his back shouted, instantly getting the student's attention, including mine.

I assume he's our instructor. He ruggedly wore a tunic over a red shirt, clearly not a sophisticated pillar mage like Sashi or our other professors. 

And the stench on this man. Jeez.

"Here's the thing. Lots of ya'll already can fight," hic, "So just duke it out over there."

He was met with mixed reactions. Ennahon sighed and shook his head while Nace chuckled. Others weren't as friendly, verbally expressing their frustration at the man, while others like me just stood still as I felt...something off about the guy.

"Bah! Complain all ye want! I've already got the list, so listen up!

Nace vs. Grud

Samantha vs. Viola

Ennahon... vs. ...Ji-Yeong?" He had trouble pronouncing the name, "Oh, would you look at this, two fifth-ring adventurers gon' square up! Bahahaha!"

Ennahon has five rings? I glanced at him, already feeling quite tense. I still haven't got the hang of my spells yet, and my body just moves on its own....

He was similarly looking at me. He was smirking.