Chapter 181: If It Works, Let Me Know!

Xu Yi surreptitiously rubbed his aching knees. His gaze drifted past Emperor Jing to the pair of poems framed behind the throne:

"With brush, he rules the realm in peace,
On steed, commands the battlefield."

He’d penned those flattering lines himself to curry favor with the Emperor. To his astonishment, the Emperor had them framed and hung here. Suddenly, Xu Yi squinted at the inscription at the bottom – was that his own name?

"Respectfully Presented by Xu Yi on Knees to His Imperial Majesty, Emperor of Great Jing..."

Xu Yi stared, dumbfounded. When did I ever present this... on my knees?!
Bloody hell! he cursed silently. The sheer audacity!

Emperor Jing appeared engrossed in a memorial, but his peripheral vision never left Xu Yi. Noticing the young man's knee-rubbing, a faint smirk touched the Emperor's lips.

Eunuch Quan stood nearby, head bowed. A flicker of malicious glee lit his eyes. For some reason, Xu Yi's aggrieved expression was deeply satisfying.

After a while, the pain became unbearable. "Your Majesty," Xu Yi ventured, "may I rise? My legs have gone quite numb."

Eunuch Quan stiffened in shock. The audacity!

The Emperor glanced up. "Rise if you wish. I never commanded you to kneel."
"Oh," Xu Yi mumbled. He wobbled to his feet, massaging his knees and thighs. "Your Majesty, might I trouble you for a chair? Standing is... difficult."

Eunuch Quan's eye twitched. What next?
"Quansheng," the Emperor ordered calmly, "provide him a seat."
Quansheng was speechless. Such indulgence! "At once, Your Majesty!"
He quickly brought a chair.
"Thank you for Your Majesty's boundless grace!" Xu Yi bowed hastily and collapsed onto the seat. His knees throbbed.

The Emperor set down his brush. "Next time you undertake some... enterprise," he said pointedly, "inform your superior first."
Xu Yi bowed his head submissively. "This humble servant obeys!"
"Xu Yi, I intend for you to oversee the reception of the Southern Yue envoy. Do not disappoint me."
"Ah?" Xu Yi blinked.
The Emperor's voice hardened. "Southern Yue is our vassal state, yet its rapid growth has fostered arrogance. These past years, they've repeatedly tested our boundaries. Border disputes have multiplied, and our forces have suffered setbacks, emboldening them further. This envoy comes demanding we cede the Hundred Li Corridor south of the border. The court is divided: some advocate appeasement, others war. What is your counsel?"

Xu Yi frowned, then sneered. "This isn't mere insolence, Your Majesty. It's Southern Yue trying to defecate upon Great Jing's very head."
"I have a plan to resolve this!"
The Emperor's eyes sharpened. "Speak."
With utmost seriousness, Xu Yi declared, "Send the appeasers to fight on the southern front. Let the hawks rejoice... once the appeasers are dead, send the hawks in. Their battle fervor will be unmatched."

The Emperor's expression froze. His lip twitched.
"Be serious," the Emperor growled. "This is a matter of state."
"I am serious!"
The Emperor snapped. "Quansheng! Take him out and administer thirty strokes!"
Xu Yi paled.
"Your Majesty! I have another plan!" he blurted.
A ghost of a smile touched the Emperor's lips. "Let's hear it."
"Southern Yue wants to be master? Then we fight! We beat them back into submission."
The Emperor frowned. "That's your plan? Southern Yue is strong now. War would be costly for Great Jing."
"A mere speck of a kingdom!" Xu Yi scoffed. "Great Jing teems with talent, commands vast armies, and utterly dwarfs their economy. Our forces outnumber theirs many times over! Our southern troops have merely lost heart after a few defeats. Win one significant battle, and their spirit will rally. Southern Yue relies on infantry; their cavalry and archers are mediocre. And..." Xu Yi leaned forward conspiratorially, "I've developed a new weapon. A cannon. A hundred times more powerful than an arquebus. It obliterates infantry formations. Range: over a mile. Those who dare offend Great Jing shall be punished, no matter how far they flee!" His words rang with steel.

The Emperor's eyes blazed. He stared intently at Xu Yi. "Truth? You've truly built this... cannon?"
Xu Yi nodded. "A prototype. Testing remains."
"Excellent! Excellent!" The Emperor surged to his feet, elated. "Xu Yi, you have my full support! Spare no expense!"
"Thank you, Your Majesty!"
"Those who dare offend..." the Emperor murmured, visibly moved. "If all in Great Jing possessed such spine, no bandit would dare touch our soil! Xu Yi, truly, you are Heaven-sent!" Beaming, the Emperor added, "Resolve the Southern Yue matter... and I shall bestow upon you the hand of the Ninth Princess in marriage."

Xu Yi's face went rigid. Reward? This feels like punishment!
"Ah... Your Majesty," he stammered, "I am still young. The Ninth Princess is but fourteen. My sole desire is to serve Your Majesty and build merit for the realm. Marriage... is not currently in my thoughts."

The Emperor's face darkened. He glanced around, visibly restraining himself, then snatched a memorial and hurled it at Xu Yi. "Wretch! How many times?! Is my daughter so repugnant to you?! And after Huai'an pleaded for your brothers' lives! Quansheng! Drag him out! Thirty strokes!"

Xu Yi dodged the flying scroll, thinking bitterly, I'm grateful the Princess helped my brothers, but I beg her brother, the Emperor, to relent!
"You DARE dodge?!" the Emperor roared.
Xu Yi forced a pained smile. "Your Majesty, please! I meant no disrespect to the Princess! She is noble, peerlessly beautiful, spirited, and charming... What am I? How could I dare find fault? I am but a crude country lad, ill-suited to courtly graces. Married to a Princess, my boorishness would surely offend her. Harmony at home is essential for serving the realm. If my household were a battlefield... how could I focus on Your Majesty's burdens? I am unworthy! The Princess deserves better!" He bowed deeply.

The Emperor studied him silently. Xu Yi's reasoning sounded plausible, yet suspicion lingered – was this still rejection? Truthfully, Xu Yi didn't dislike the Princess; he detested the suffocating rituals and endless rules of the imperial family. Everything was a potential offense.

"Sincere?" the Emperor asked flatly.
"Utterly sincere, Your Majesty," Xu Yi swore solemnly. "Without Your Majesty's grace, my head would have rolled a thousand times over. Should I marry the Princess and later incur Your Majesty's wrath... my death would be meaningless, but to implicate her? I could not rest in peace."

The Emperor's expression softened slightly, a flicker of smugness crossing his face. So the boy knows he lives by my indulgence?
"Since you recognize your temperament," the Emperor said sternly, "strive for humility and restraint. Cease provoking me. However... your concern for Huai'an is noted. Perhaps I misjudged. Huai'an is lively and unburdened by excessive ceremony. Enough. These are troubled times. We shall revisit this later." He waved a dismissive hand. "Xu Yi, expedite the cannon. The Minister of War will provide full support. Remember – like the arquebus – manufacture parts separately, assemble later."
Xu Yi bowed. "Your servant obeys!"
"Go. Prepare for the Southern Yue envoy's arrival. The Head of the Hanlin Academy, Li Hanru, and Vice-Minister of Rites, Shen Min, will assist you. Consult them if needed."
"Yes, Your Majesty. I take my leave." Xu Yi took a few steps, then paused. "Your Majesty... might I impose on Eunuch Quan for a small favor?"
"What favor?"
"Well..."
"Speak plainly!"
"I... I need help finding certain medicinal herbs. I've searched many apothecaries without success. Surely the palace has them?"
"Herbs? Are you injured? Unwell? I shall summon the Imperial Physician."
"Thank you for Your Majesty's concern. I am unhurt and well."
The Emperor nodded. "Quansheng, fetch them for him."
"At your command, Your Majesty!" Eunuch Quan turned to Xu Yi. "Young Master Xu, if you provide a list..."
Xu Yi produced a paper. "I have it here. Please procure, say... eighty or a hundred doses? Not too many."
Eunuch Quan's eye twitched violently. A hundred doses?! Does he plan to eat them?! Taking the paper, he scanned it and froze. A few herbs?! This list has dozens!

The Emperor, curious, demanded, "Bring it here."
Eunuch Quan hurriedly handed over the list.
The Emperor glanced at it, then at Xu Yi. "What ailment does this remedy?"
Xu Yi grinned. "None, Your Majesty! I obtained it from a... wandering practitioner. For internal and external use. Promises abundant vigor, boundless energy... robust vitality."
"I shall test it. If effective, Your Majesty might also benefit."
The Emperor chuckled derisively. "You trust the words of a charlatan?"
"Not a charlatan, Your Majesty! The Madam at the Pleasure House swore this man stayed ten days without leaving his bed, exhausting over a dozen girls. His... endurance... was legendary, fueled solely by this formula. When he couldn't pay..." Xu Yi was warming to his tale when Eunuch Quan cleared his throat sharply. The sheer impropriety!
Xu Yi flushed. "Your Majesty, forgive my coarse words!"
The Emperor studied the list, a faint gleam in his eyes. Middle age brought its burdens. Where once he could nightly attend a consort, the demands of state and passing years had taken their toll. His last visit to the inner palace was over ten days ago.
"Quansheng, procure the herbs for Xu Yi."
"Yes!"
As Eunuch Quan departed, the Emperor cleared his throat. "Ahem... Xu Yi. If this remedy proves... effective... do inform me."
Xu Yi blinked, then broke into a wide, knowing grin.
The Emperor's cheeks flushed. "Silence!"
Xu Yi bowed, schooling his features. "Should it prove efficacious, Your Majesty shall be the first to know."
The Emperor gave a curt nod.