The Assyrian countryside had all vanished into the night. Only the groaning, winding caravan remained, a lone spark amid the overwhelming dark. 

Deep inside the cramped cart, Shobai jostled with yet another foe – his nightmares. Bone-chilling terrors that had claimed his sleep since childhood, night after agonizing night.

In this dream, Shobai saw a barbarian shackled between two cold stone pillars in a grand cathedral. His muscles strained against the chains which carved into his wrists.

The Lion Slayer reduced to a blind fool! One voice said. Where is your Lord now?

Surrounding him, hundreds of richly adorned aristocrats laughed and cheered. The malice beneath their words burned like embers in the night.

Execute him! The crowd shouted. 

The barbarian remained silent as a massive scythe glided into the room–its sharp edge sparking with blood from its last kill. Even as the blade fell, his eyes were fixed not on the crowd, but up to the heavens. In that moment, there was a peace about him that transcended understanding.

ROARRRRR. 

When suddenly, the barbarian struck. With unimaginable strength, he threw his hands against the pillars, shattering them like twigs. Bricks and mortar rained down from the sky in fiery fury. The once-proud aristocrats cried out in terror as the cathedral burned. 

The barbarian turned to Shobai, his eyes ablaze and courageous. And within seconds, the entire cathedral collapsed–erupting in a cloud of smoke and ash.

 Shobai. A voice called out.

A strangled, dry cough tore from Shobai’s throat as he came to. He tried to move, but his limbs refused, trapped in a waking nightmare more real than the one he'd left. 

It’s just a dream. He reassured himself. One that would end with him on campus in his tiny bed. But the creaking cart reminded him of the truth.

Shobai! A woman said, her shrill voice snapping him from paralysis. Are you still asleep?

His head sunk deeper into the ground beneath him. He would recognize that horrid voice anywhere.

Don’t you ignore me! She said.

But he did. Just a few more minutes? He hadn’t thought about it before, but the caravan was awfully comfortable. The spot below his head was amazing–so squishy and soft. It almost felt like a pillow. Wait a minute…

A cold dread began to set in. How could a wooden cart be so soft? Even with hay, the warmth felt too realistic. The squish, too squishy. Shobai slowly opened his eyes. 

AHHHH!!  Shobai clapped a hand over his mouth, stifling the scream. His soft, squishy spot was actually… another prisoner's butt!

It was an accident. Shobai said, his voice waking several of the other travelers in the caravan.

You slept six hours! Tiana said. Do you know how bored I was? And now I’m thirsty. I demand–

Will you shut up! A lizardman thundered from the back of the caravan. His bloodshot eyes leered at Tiana. The tension was palpable. Just as fearlessly, she stared back, her face aglow with reckless abandon.

Water. Tiana said. And a cardamom bun, too. 

There’s no water and you ate all our food! The lizardman said.

Then you should have packed more!

What are you doing? Shobai said.

Don’t worry. Tiana winked. I read his stats. We can take him. 

Oh, yeah? The lizardman marched towards Tiana and Shobai. Come on, then! 

Shobai trembled with each caravan-rattling step. Would they really be strong enough to fend off a lizardman? And what if the driver stopped the caravan? Bazi said this caravan was the only way to reach the human-territory of Behemoth without an adventurer party. The town was safe, and it was on the way to the Citadel. If they got thrown off now…

Get away from him! Another traveler said. That human… is cursed. 

The lizardman pulled back, his eyes wide and horrified. Cursed? What are you saying?

The woman continued, her voice frantic and hysterical. I saw him shouting all night like someone possessed. And then he did the unthinkable… He grabbed Vivek’s butt while pretending to sleep!

Shobai’s face burned bright red. No, that was an accident! I thought–

He’s a pervert! She said. The crowd erupted in gasps of horror, even Shobai. 

That’s right. Tiana said, her grin widening. And he’ll grab your butt next if you don’t hand over all the sweets!

That’s not… He tried to explain, but it was too late–the damage was done. Soon, a tower of pastries piled at Tiana’s feet.

How could this moment get any worse? Shobai thought.

SLAM. 

The caravan grinded to an abrupt, shuddering stop and the rear gate bucked open. 

There, in the morning light, stood absolute horror. Muscles like twisted bronze over oily, green skin. Pointy ears and sharp yellow teeth. And a smell that could kill a skunk. 

Welcome to hell, ladies and monsters. The ogre said.