Shihwan stood outside the theatre doors. There was no practice schedule for the day, so he knew that Boram, who had volunteered to sign for the prop deliveries, would be alone.

He took a deep breath and looked down at his hands.

His palms glistened faintly in the sunlight.

This was a first, he mused. He had never been so nervous.

He cleared his throat as he mentally went over what he had planned to say.

It had been a few days since the night they had gone to dinner with Insu and Hajoon. And every day since that night, Shihwan had regularly met up with Boram.

They had gotten closer as they worked together preparing for the play, helping the cast practice their lines, painting props, assisting the fashion department tailor the costumes, etc.

Those days had been fun. All sadness from that night seemed to have disappeared from Boram, and Shihwan didn’t think it was too arrogant to think of himself as the reason why.

He also couldn’t help but wonder if this meant that Boram had ended that painful relationship he had alluded to that night.

Which was the reason why Shihwan was at the theatre that day.

He was going to confess his feelings to Boram. And though Shihwan did not think he would accept his feelings right away, at least Boram would know that he had options, that he wasn’t stuck in his toxic relationship.

At least, he hoped.

Shihwan grimaced. He also knew that it was possible that his confession would have the opposite effect of making Boram feel cornered.

He sighed. Then shook his head.

He had never felt this way for anyone before. And Shihwan wanted to be with him as more than just friends or, at least, plant that seed in while he could.

It was a chance he simply had to take.

He cleared his throat and returned his attention to the door in front of him. He braced himself as he placed his hand on the wood leading into the back rooms of the theater.

He took a deep breath, gathering his courage, and pushed the door open.

~

Well, he did say that he hadn’t exactly expected everything to go well the first time around.

Not when Boram was so obviously embroiled in what sounded like a complicated, unrequited love.

But he hadn’t exactly expected who the other party was or even the fact that said party was seemingly pushing an angry Boram against the wall, his hand pinned against Boram’s wrist, their lips pressed together in a forceful kiss.

Shihwan cursed softly before his feet bounded.

He grabbed the man’s arm and yanked it away from Boram.

He forcefully turned the man around. Then froze, surprised to find Hajoon staring at him with nothing more than a questioning arch of his brows.

“What are you doing?” Shihwan hissed when he found his words again.

Hajoon did not respond, instead staring down at the hand that still grabbed his wrist.

But Shihwan did not release him. He knew that his hold was likely painful, but with the display he had seen earlier, he simply couldn’t risk releasing him.

“Shihwan!” Boram said from behind them as a hand grabbed Shihwan’s arm. “What are you doing?” he asked frantically as he tried to loosen Shihwan’s grip.

“He was forcing himself on you, hyung,” Shihwan replied, not taking his eyes off the sunbae.

“No, he wasn’t!”

“I saw it. You were struggling; he was pinning you to the wall.”

“I– I–,” fumbled Boram as he vainly tried to separate them. “You’re wrong! You misread it!”

“Then explain it to me,” Shihwan responded through gritted teeth, trying to keep his calm.

Boram grew quiet.

“Why don’t you just tell him?” Hajoon said to Boram, breaking the silence.

Shihwan met the sunbae’s eyes and paused. For a moment, it looked like Hajoon’s eyes were gleaming in the dim light, but it came and went so quickly that Shihwan had no choice but to think that he had been mistaken.

“He–He wasn’t forcing himself on me,” Boram said finally in a soft voice. “We’re—” he paused and averted his gaze. “We’re sleeping together.”

Shihwan finally turned to look at him.

Boram was blushing furiously.

“Sleeping together?” Shihwan repeated to himself, his mouth moving but no words coming out.

It was confirmation that Hajoon was the guy Boram had spoken of that night. He was the guy using Boram to warm his bed.

He grimaced, disliking the image it brought to his mind.

He moved to release the sunbae when he stopped. His grip suddenly tightened on Hajoon’s arms.

“You,” he hissed, more viciously than he had intended, as he took a step forward. “You were hitting on Insu. You—You were trying to cheat with Boram on Insu.”

“What?” Boram exclaimed, his eyes wide. “No! We’re not— We’re not together.”

This time his entire face was bright, cherry red. “We’re just sleeping together to help—uh, blow off steam and we… we agreed to stop when either of us found someone we care about.”

Shihwan opened his mouth, then closed it again as he looked at the expression on Boram’s face. He was attempting to smile, but the smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.

He looked up and met Hajoon’s gaze.

The sunbae was watching Boram with an almost blank expression.

And again, Shihwan found that he did not like this man.

He took a deep breath, then finally released his arm.

Boram released a sigh of relief, but before he could diffuse the situation even further, Shihwan turned to him and gently grabbed his hand.

“Hyung, I want to talk to you,” he said.

Boram looked at him with confusion. He then glanced at Hajoon only to see that expressionless face staring back at them.

Boram turned back to him, trying but failing to hide his disappointment in not finding what he was searching for on Hajoon’s face. He nodded. “Okay.”

Shihwan led him to the back of the stage where the cast normally gathered.

Boram turned for one last glance in Hajoon’s direction.

Shihwan did the same despite somehow knowing that the man had not followed. If he had, Shihwan would have been able to smell him.

He froze. He wasn’t sure why he was suddenly so certain of that. Hajoon did not have a noticeable smell—

He shook his head to force himself back into the moment. Now was not the time.

“Hyung,” he said when Boram did not turn back right away.

Boram jumped, having been lost in his thoughts and turned in surprise to face Shihwan.

Irritated, Shihwan placed himself between Boram and the stage.

Boram looked at him questioningly.

“Is he the guy?” Shihwan asked.

“What?”

“The guy you were talking about that night.”

Shihwan watched Boram's face as he obviously struggled between telling him the truth or not.

And for some reason, that made all of Shihwan’s previous irritation disappear.

He didn’t want to corner him.

He liked him. This was not what he was here for.

Sighing, he gently held Boram’s hand. “Sorry, hyung. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. I was just really worked up back there. This isn’t why I am here.”

“No, I am sorry,” replied Boram in a quiet voice. “I should have been more careful. It must have been shocking for you to have seen something like that. As your sunbae, I should be the one apologizing.”

Boram smiled, this time the gesture meeting his eyes. “So what did you want to tell me?”

“I…” Shihwan began, then stopped. He knew now that this wouldn’t go well. Those glances Boram set Hajoon sunbae’s way was more than confirmation enough, but—

He looked into Boram’s large brown eyes. The hurt and the desperation he had seen in his eyes had been difficult to witness.

He didn’t like it. He didn’t like seeing the vibrant man being led astray by some asshole who was so obviously using him.

And that’s what drove him. Even if Boram did reject him, at least he would know that he had options, that he was desired, that he didn’t have to force himself to remain in such a situation.

“Hyung,” said Shihwan softly. “Can’t it be me?”

“What?” replied Boram, his brows scrunching up in confusion. “Can what… be you?”

Shihwan’s gaze bore into Boram’s eyes as he continued to hold onto the older man’s hand. “Can’t it be me?” Shihwan repeated gently. “Can’t you just date me?”