Emilio Francine De Ramos

My cellphone didn’t ring, and I ended up being fifteen minutes late for my first period. Luckily, our professor was also late. My first subject was Ethics and Morality, our professor here was pretty strict, so I dodged a bullet with his sermon this time. When I arrived in the classroom, the first person I looked for was Yuwan. When I finally spotted him, I made my way to the empty seat next to him.

“Good morning, Mr. Emilio ‘I am never late to class’ De Ramos,” he joked, a playful smirk on his face.

“Shut up, I’m not in the mood right now,” I snapped back. To be honest, I just didn’t have the energy to talk to him or anyone at the moment. I hadn’t even had breakfast and I’d barely had any sleep last night, preoccupied with thoughts about the annoying guy sitting next to me.

“Oh, bad mood? Are you on your period or something?” he teased, but I remained silent, just as our professor walked in.

Throughout the class, I ignored Yuwan completely. I was listening to the lesson, though not really absorbing it; I just wanted to steer clear of him for now. I must have looked angry because it was obvious I was avoiding him.

I couldn’t bring myself to talk to him, and I was still replaying what happened yesterday in my mind. Why was I so affected by it when we didn’t even have a label in the first place? When the subject ended, I rushed out of the classroom. I was almost out the door when Yuwan stopped me.

“Emil, wait! Are you mad at me?” he asked softly. Damn it, why did he have to be so cute?

“No, why would you say that?”

“Well, you weren’t paying attention to me earlier. I thought maybe I did something to upset you,” he said, looking genuinely concerned, his brows furrowing adorably.

“I’m not mad, I just wasn’t in the mood. I didn’t get to have breakfast,” I explained.

“In that case, here,” he handed me a chocolate bun. “This is for you.”

“Yuwan, no, that’s yours,” I said shyly, refusing to take it.

“I insist, Emil. You said you haven’t had breakfast, so eat this,” he urged, his expression serious yet warm.

“Thank you.” I unwrapped the bread and took a bite. “It’s good,” I said simply, savoring the chocolatey sweetness.

“I know it’s your favorite,” he said, and honestly, I was blushing at how much he noticed me. “What’s your next class?”

“My next class was supposed to be History of Architecture, but my professor is absent today. I have five hours till my next at four.”

“If that’s the case, why don’t we hang out at the mall for a bit?” he suggested enthusiastically.

“Don’t you have Engineering Management at 10? Hey, are you skipping class again?” I asked in a serious but I gave his arm a playful smack.

“Ouch! What’s with that? And it’s fine. Nothing is going on in that class anyway; it’s just a new lesson. I’ll just ask my classmates for some notes later. Let’s go!” he insisted, pulling me toward the exit.

The mall was close to our school, just a short 20 minute walk, so a lot of students from St. James would hang out there daily. It was kind of marked as a St. James students’ hangout place.

Surprisingly, Yuwan didn’t complain about the walk. I had thought we’d take a cab or drive there because of his laziness, but when it came to ditching and hangouts, Yuwan was all about getting there, whether on foot or with a car. He might be a bit lazy when it came to studying, but his grades were decent enough to pass.

“Let’s hit the arcade, Emil!” he said, excitement bubbling in his voice as we neared the mall.

“Wait, Yuwan, are you sure it’s okay for you to skip that class?” I asked, worried that he might get in trouble with his professor again.

“It’s fine! I’m pretty sure I can handle it, piece of cake!” he laughed, confidence shining in his eyes.

“And how are you sure about that?” I raised an eyebrow, skeptical.

“Well, the professor is our buddy on the basketball team. We always play together at the basketball court. So I know he won’t call me out,” he said, chuckling.

“You’re really something else Yuwan,” I said, giving him a playful nudge. “Also, don’t treat your professor like that; he’s still someone you need to respect.”

“Yes, ma’am!” he joked, pretending to salute before taking off running.

“You!” I shouted, chasing after him. He really knew how to get on my nerves. As I ran after him, I didn’t even notice we had reached the entrance of the mall.

“We’re here! Argh!” he yelled, clutching his head. I had lightly smacked the back of his neck, thinking he wouldn’t expect a comeback.

“That’s for making me run here. You jerk!” I said, trying to catch my breath.

“At least you got some exercise; now let’s head inside!” he said, beaming.

Once we entered the mall, our first stop was our favorite ice cream shop. Yuwan and I had been obsessed with this ice cream shop since we were kids. We always ordered the same thing: I got an ice cream sandwich, and he got a chocolate soft serve.

Yuwan always bought the large size because we would share his ice cream, even though I never insisted he share his soft serve with me since I had my ice cream but you know Yuwan; he wouldn’t take no for an answer.

After ordering, I noticed he hadn’t gotten a soft serve this time but an ice cream on a stick instead. I ignored it, thinking maybe he just wanted something different. We sat down in the seating area to enjoy our ice cream. I noticed Yuwan was busy typing on his cell phone while eating his ice cream. I felt a bit off about it because this wasn’t how Yuwan used to be.

Back when we were freshmen, we made a promise to each other that whenever we went out or he invited me somewhere, we shouldn’t get distracted by our phones so we could bond properly. Had he forgotten that?

“Hey Yuwan, I thought no phones allowed?” I called out, half-joking.

“Oh right, sorry!” he said, quickly shoving his phone into his pocket.

“Is it important? It’s okay if you want to entertain it first,” I added, thinking maybe it was a message from a professor.

“No, it’s just Heather. I told her I was at the mall. Turns out she’s here too,” he said casually, and my heart sank a little at the mention of her name.

“Oh, well, where is she?” I asked as if I was interested, even though I felt a pang of disappointment knowing she was here.

“She’s at the clothing store, buying something. Let’s go see her before we hit the arcade!” He didn’t give me a chance to object and started walking toward the clothing store.

When we arrived, we found Heather waiting by the side of the store.

“Heather!” Yuwan called out.

“Yuwan!” she replied, running to hug him. Wow, she had the right to embrace him.

“Hi Emil, you’re here too?” she smiled at me, and I returned a smile, masking my annoyance at her presence.

“Oh, Yuwan, here,” she said, rummaging through the paper bag she was carrying.

“Here, for you,” she said, handing him a black bucket hat. I rolled my eyes, chuckling inwardly. Yuwan doesn’t like wearing hats.

“Wow! This is nice!” Yuwan exaggerated, putting on the bucket hat. To be fair, it did look good on him.

“It suits you, Yuwan!” Heather exclaimed.

“Really? Do I look more handsome?” he asked, winking at her. She didn’t respond but turned her face away, embarrassed.

“What about you, Emil? Do I look cooler?” he asked, directing the question at me.

“You look like a monkey with a hat,” I shot back, of course, not wanting to admit he actually looked good.

“You’re so mean,” he pouted, sticking his tongue out at me. He shifted his gaze to her.

“So, what’s your plan, Heather?” Yuwan asked her.

“I was about to head to the bookstore to buy a new book,” she replied, excitement in her voice.

“Do you want us to join you?” The fuck? When did I agree to wanting to join too?

“Oh you don’t have to Yuwan, I wouldn’t want to bother you or Emil. You might have other plans,” she said shyly.

“It’s fine, we’re just going to the arcade to pass the time. Let Emil and I tag along, right?” He glanced at me with pleading eyes.

“Of course, sure. Let’s go with you to the bookstore,” I relented, knowing I couldn’t refuse.

“Really? Let’s go then!” she cheered.

“You really like these kinds of books, Heather?” Yuwan asked casually while watching her juggle a pile of books.

“Oh yes, I’m actually in love with this genre, so I buy whatever fits,” she explained. I couldn’t blame her; as a communication student, it made sense she’d enjoy reading.

But I couldn’t help but wonder why all her book covers were black. Was the genre horror? The covers looked a bit scary. I picked up one of the books she chose from the shelf and read the blurb. After reading it, all I could say was, Why was it so explicit? Why was it about sex? And what was this about a mafia kidnapper? Is this even normal? I questioned Heather’s taste in literature.

Yuwan was looking at me, and we shared a look of terror. I guessed he read the blurb too.

“It’s an interesting genre, I must say,” I remarked and returned the book to the shelf, trying to mask my shock.

“Well, dark romance isn’t for everyone, so I get why you guys are looking at me like I’m a freak,” she laughed.

“We’re not judging you; we were just surprised, I guess,” Yuwan said, attempting to ease the tension.

“Don’t worry, I expected that reaction from you guys. I mean who wouldn’t be surprised to read something like that?” Heather laughed, carrying the five books to the cashier.

“Are you heading to the arcade after this?” Heather asked.

“Yep, and maybe we’ll grab lunch after a few games,” Yuwan replied enthusiastically.

“Can I join you, guys? I want to play some games too,” she asked.

“Sure! We have no issue if you join us, right bro?” Yuwan nudged me.

“Uh, yeah, the more, the merrier,” I replied, my tone not .

“Yes! Let’s hit the arcade!” Heather shouted.

“Let’s go!”

What was supposed to be a simple arcade outing between Yuwan and me turned into a fun day for him and Heather. They teamed up for a zombie apocalypse game, became dance partners in Dance Dance Revolution, and even had a duet in karaoke. While they enjoyed themselves, I stood off to the side, watching them.

They invited me to join their games, but I declined, knowing I would just feel out of place between them. So I stayed behind, keeping an eye on our stuff. On the outside, I appeared fine, but deep inside, my heart ached to see Yuwan so happy with Heather. I wanted to be that person who could make him smile and feel joyful, but it seemed someone had already taken that spot for me. 

The three of us headed outside before our 3 pm classes. Yuwan insisted that Heather should walk with us and I watched as they strolled ahead, still animated, exchanging inside jokes from the day’s games. I trailed behind, feeling like the third wheel.

As we were walking back to St. James, Heather playfully nudged Yuwan. “You better play Dance Dance Revolution with me next time. I need a rematch.”

Yuwan laughed. “Yeah, well unless you want to lose again,”

“Maybe we should let Emil join in next time. Can’t have him just standing on the sidelines again, right?” Heather said, glancing back at me with a grin.

I forced a smile, but before I could respond, Yuwan chimed in. “I mean, he doesn’t like dancing, he’s more like a chill person. Not everyone has our moves,” he teased, giving me a wink.

“Maybe,” I muttered, hoping my voice didn’t sound as hollow as I felt.

As we continued to walk, they continued chatting, their voices a soft murmur as they recounted highlights from the arcade.

When we reached the school, she turned around and shot me a friendly smile. “Thanks for tagging along, Emil. And next time, you’re joining for karaoke. No excuses.”

I managed a chuckle. Glancing back at me with a grin She entered her building to her next class, waving a quick goodbye to both of us. “See you, Yuwan. And thanks for today.”

Yuwan gave her a mock salute, and she laughed, shutting the door behind her. As she walked toward her building, I caught the way Yuwan’s gaze lingered a moment longer, a soft smile on his lips. An uncomfortable knot tightened in my chest.

As Yuwan and I walked toward our building, silence filled the air. The warmth from before seemed to dissipate, leaving behind a void I didn’t know how to fill. I focused on my phone, pretending to scroll on it even though I wasn’t looking at anything in an attempt to distract myself.

“Hey,” Yuwan said, breaking the silence. “You good?”

I looked over at him, managing a small nod. “Yeah, just… tired.”

He glanced at me briefly, a flicker of concern in his eyes. “You were really quiet today. I mean, you could’ve joined us. It would’ve been more fun.”

I hesitated, choosing my words carefully. “It looked like you and Heather were having a great time. I didn’t want to interrupt.”

Yuwan sighed. “You wouldn’t have been interrupting. You’re my best friend, Emil. You know that, right?”

There was something gentle in his tone that made my chest ache even more. I wanted to believe him, wanted to cling to the reassurance, but the image of him laughing and dancing with Heather replayed in my mind, taunting me.

“Yeah, I know,” I replied, my voice barely above a whisper.

Yuwan’s eyes were still on me, as if I could sense he wanted to say something more. Instead, he just nodded, his expression unreadable. “Alright. Just... next time, don’t hold back, okay?”

“Sure,” I lied, knowing full well that watching him with someone else felt like a wall between us that was only getting thicker.

The rest of the walk was in silence, the distance between us stretching wider than ever. And I wondered if Yuwan truly knew how I felt, or if he was just as oblivious as he seemed. I just hoped nothing would come between them, that this was just a temporary phase so that Yuwan and I could return to the bond we once shared.