Insu watched, wide-eyed, as Shihwan’s tongue gently lapped up the blood from his thumb.

Badump. Badump.

He was killing him.

Was Shihwan sick? Why did he keep doing things that were unlike him?

In the years Insu had known him, the guy had never even hinted at having any sexual desire. He was the guy who didn’t even blink when girls pressed their chest against his arm, naively, blissfully unaware of the invitation. 

So then, where did all this sexual energy suddenly come from?

The way Shihwan was licking his finger was slow and charged with meaning. His eyes were narrowed, softly gazing into Insu’s as his tongue gently flicked over Insu’s thumb.

A shudder spread throughout Insu’s body.

Badump. Badump.

Had he eaten something bad? 

Had some sexy fairy come and imbued him with some sexy fairy dust that made him sexy???

It was all wrong. And yet Insu didn’t dare stop him.

He knew that he was a bastard, taking advantage of his friend like this, knowing that Shihwan had a broken heart.

Dammit.

“What the hell are you doing?” Insu asked, but made no move to pull away.

Shihwan, who had closed his eyes, turned his head to gaze up at him, his lips pressed against Inus’s thumb.

Insu felt something hot unfurl in his stomach.

For a tense moment, during which Insu felt like his heart would burst out of his chest, Shihwan simply stared at him with an intense gaze. His eyes glinted, and again, Insu had the strange feeling that something was different about him. 

Then, even as his eyes remained on Insu’s, Shihwan licked his finger in one long, slow lick.

Insu shivered.

Shihwan was drunk, he reminded himself. He had gotten himself drunk to ease his broken heart.

But this drunken Shihwan was nothing like the ones from before. Normally, he was a calm drunk. Perhaps, he smiled a little too much, giving some unlucky soul the wrong impression, but he certainly didn’t become a seductive casanova.

He was driving him insane.

“Insu,” he said in a tone that Insu had always imagined his bedroom voice would sound like.

“Wh-What?” Insu stammered, his heart hammering so fast in his chest he almost felt like throwing up.

“Insu,” Shihwan said his name again, his eyes closing as he pressed another kiss on Insu’s thumb. “Why do you smell so good?”

Insu jerked at the words. “What?”

Without warning, Shihwan leaned over him.

Insu instinctively pulled back. But having forgotten that he had moved away from the sofa on which he had been leaning, his back hit the floor.

Insu winced. But then a shadow fell over him, and he opened his eyes to see Shihwan leaning over him, his intense eyes assessing.

Insu closed his eyes, preparing himself for what he knew was coming.

Shihwan was going to kiss him.

And while he didn’t know the reason why—it might have been the rejection Shihwan had faced earlier, it might have been the alcohol, or maybe Shihwan was simply feeling lonely.

But, at that moment, Insu realized that it didn’t matter. Because he wanted it. Just once. Just a little taste…

He could just blame the alcohol, a voice inside him said.

Damn, but could he really do it?

Could he throw away sixteen years of silent longing?

He began to panic as he warred with himself.

Insu, you idiot. What are you doing—taking advantage of the situation like this? But then, when would he get such an opportunity like this again?

As Insu argued with himself, he didn’t notice Shihwan moving in until it was too late.

The first touch of Shihwan’s lips froze him. It was soft, gentle, almost innocent.

Shihwan lifted his head and stared down at him, a touch of surprise in his expression, before lowering his head once again.

The second touch wiped all thoughts from Insu’s mind.

Wordlessly, Insu found himself reaching out and wrapping his arms around Shihwan’s neck.

It was just as he had expected — tender, kind, and wholesome.

Wholesome?? His mind nearly choked on the last word when he felt Shihwan’s large hand suddenly snake its way into his shirt.

Immediately, Shihwan began caressing him, moving his hand over his skin carefully but in measured, controlled movements, each touch lingering, barely grazing. All while his mouth moved languidly over his, his tongue gently pushing against the opening of Insu’s lips, quietly demanding entry.

It was a seduction. There was no other word to describe it.

Insu moaned when he felt Shihwan’s finger gently flick a sensitive nub, and Shihwan took that moment to run his tongue fully over his.

Insu shivered even as he bemoaned himself.

Has he always been so easy?

“Insu,” Shihwan whispered, and Insu opened his eyes to meet his best friend’s gaze.

“Insu,” Shihwan repeated. “God, you taste so good.”

Insu stared at him for a long moment before he felt something within him snap. And he pulled Shihwan back down on top of him, taking his mouth in another searing kiss.

For long moments, Insu could only taste, smell, and feel Shihwan. Everything — all his desires, all his dreams were within reach, and he reveled in them.

Until the ringing of a phone broke through the haze.

Insu froze as reality struck him.

What are we doing?

Shihwan had just gotten rejected. He had been heartbroken enough to get drunk, which he rarely did. Insu was simply a source of comfort for him. Shihwan didn’t see him in the same way Insu did.

He was just a rebound. This was nothing more than a well-timed but unfortunate situation. 

Dammit. Self-hatred rose within him.

Taking the last bit of self-will and self-esteem he had left, Insu placed his hand on Shihwan’s chest and pushed.

For a moment, Shihwan didn’t budge as he blinked down at him. His pink lips were glistening and slightly swollen, his eyes glazed from alcohol and something Insu didn’t care to recognize.

But then something seemed to register within him, and Shihwan blinked and quickly moved off of him.

Insu could see the exact moment when reasoning returned as Shihwan’s eyes regained focus, and he immediately sat down beside him.

“Damn,” Shihwan muttered as he rubbed the back of his neck. “What the hell am I doing?”

Insu’s heart throbbed as he watched Shihwan berate himself.

It was a natural response. After all, he hadn’t meant to kiss Insu.

Shihwan turned to him, grimacing once more, regret clear on his face.

Insu took a deep breath to settle himself.

“I'm sorry,” Shiwahn began, then winced and rubbed the back of his neck once more. “Damn, Insu—I… didn’t mean to. How can I possibly tell you how sorry I am?”

Insu took another deep breath, staving away the hurt. He wanted to run and hide, but, at the same time, he couldn’t help but feel sympathy for his friend. After all, who better than himself would know exactly what Shihwan was going through?

“Don’t worry about it,” Insu said, glad that his voice was still steady. He didn’t want to hear Shihwan’s regret; he didn’t want to hear any more excuses or =apologies. And the best way to do that was to just shut him up and fast. “We were both drunk.”

But Shihwan seemed not to have heard him. “I really can’t apologize enough. It must have been gross having a guy kiss you and stroke your chest.”

Irritated, Insu gritted his teeth. “It wasn’t,” he said thoughtlessly, then immediately closed his mouth.

Shihwan turned to him with a surprised expression.

“I mean,” Insu stumbled, trying hard to come up with something to fix his words. “It’s not that big a deal. It’s you. We’ve been friends forever.”

Shihwan stared at him for a long moment, blinking.

Insu turned away, a change of topic on the tip of his tongue when he heard Shihwan say something that made his blood run cold.

He laughed softly. “You truly are a good guy,” Shihwan said before a sigh escaped his lips. “Why couldn’t I have just fallen in love with you instead?”

And Insu, whose heart had finally begun to settle in his chest, felt it break into a million pieces.

.