ELEVEN

–

We have dinner, not just because of me but because Mikey says it will be best to stay hidden for a while longer, in case the security sweeps that part of the road again. Once we’re refueled, and nearly bone dry of water, he checks his phone to recalculate our position, and given how deep into the forest we fled, decides it will be safer to continue through the trees, cutting across to the train tracks we had been aiming for previously.

It’s a harder trek over uneven ground, roots, and stones, but luckily it’s not too far until the trees open up to the railroad. Somehow, even after all these years of being unused, the foliage has not yet overtaken the tracks, so hiking between the rails is a much needed relief to my exhausted legs. It’s four more kilometers until we get to the outskirts of Pripyat, and hearing the update is the only thing keeping me from collapsing. About an hour left; we’ll make it before sunset, if we don’t stop walking.

After another kilometer - my body was starting to recognize the distance subconsciously now - we stumble across an abandoned crane hidden amongst the trees, completely out of sight until we are nearly directly under it. And Lex throws a cog in my will power by stopping to shed his bag. 

“Eu îl urc.” Whatever he says, it’s flat and matter of fact, and he immediately heads towards the crane. 

It hurts just to stop, my legs burning with pain from standing still.

Mikey is exasperated as he pauses also. “Lex, budʹ laska…”

“Cinci minute,” Lex responds, before picking up to a jog, out of talking range.

Clearly there was no arguing, either because Lex was too stubborn or Mikey was too exhausted. He threw his head back in frustration, before abandoning his bag also and taking off, calling after Lex, “chekay na mene.”

Nico collapses, and I can’t resist anymore either, so I crumble under the weight of mine and just let it prop me up as I catch my breath on the ground. When I can speak without panting too hard, I ask, “What are they doing?”

Nico is still winded, his face vibrant red. So he points to the crane, and says one word. “Climb.”

I gawk, at him, then the crane, watching the boys as they begin maneuvering the bottom of the old machine, up to the base of the crane neck. 

I rise without my rucksack, but take my camera and chase after them. I manage to get there when Lex is finding his footing, a first attempt at scaling the rusty machinery. When I reach them, they both glance, so I call in the same playfully scolding tone Lex had used with me. “Are you crazy?” 

Lex laughs, for what I think might be the first time. It’s little more than an indignant chortle, but I can’t help but smile when I hear it. “You joining us, Vulpiță?”

Mikey offers a hand to help me up to the base of the crane neck with him, but I hesitate while looking straight up at the peak. I take a step back, chickening out. “I think I’ll keep my feet on the ground, thanks.”

Mikey smirks, but nods, then starts up the neck after Lex. There’s no place for their feet, and the angle is too steep, so the climb is a careful mix of crawling and scooting up the neck.

Lex doesn’t let me off the hook as easily though. He stops to catch a breath, saying, “You’ll never truly see the world by keeping your feet on the soil.” 

I counter, needing to shout now but trying not to let my voice carry too far. “Icarus flew too close to the sun and look what happened to him.”

I got him to laugh again. This time, more of a bark. I picture him like the Chernobyl dogs; not the ones that begged for belly rubs, but the ones that lingered in the buildings and watched, that seemed to traverse the landscape like they were part monkey. Born in the rumble and home amongst the dilapidation. Thriving.

“I don’t need wings. I can climb to the sun,” Lex answers finally, as he nears the top. The crane’s peak reached above the trees surrounding us, and given their towering height, I guess they are at least 100 feet up. When Lex reaches the top platform he rises to his feet, and the wind that I can’t feel from down in the forest blows his cap off and he squints at Mikey, obviously grinning under the mask. 

Then, a moment of boldness in his elation, he rips his mask down and howls, starting bright like his barking laugh but damping to a long call like a wolf. 

Mikey grabs Lex’s leg once he gets to the top also, to mess with him but mostly to shut him up, and Lex turns. I catch a glimpse of the edge of his mouth, smirking down at Mikey as he shakes him off. He’s so far away though, I can’t make out anything about his features. 

I instantly grapple for my camera and aim it up at them, zooming in as much as I can, then adjusting the focus. But I’m too slow. When I find him in frame, Lex has just pulled the mask back up over his face, and he’s looking at me. His eyes squint with another grin, winking as I snap a shot. 

My heart pounds through my chest to my fingertips with disappointment, feeling once again like a hunter just missing their target. I shake it off by moving to retrieve Lex’s hat.

As promised, they take five minutes and their boots are on the ground with me again. Heading back to our bags, Lex falls into step with me, putting the hat back on his head when I hand it to him, and says, “Next time, you’re climbing.”

I scoff. “No thanks.”

He gives me a pointed look, and I can’t help but hold it. Satisfied with my attention, he adds weight to the dare in his eyes. “If you want pictures for your story, you’re climbing. How else will anyone see Chernobyl like we do?”

I lift my chin a little, to show I’ve understood his meaning, the stipulation he’s secretly offered. Prove myself. But I don’t say anything further, too scared to actually accept it. 

It was almost impossible to get moving again, but Lex took to kicking my heels every time I let my feet drag, until my options were either to strangle him or pick up my pace, and I felt like strangling him might be marginally more exhausting. I definitely wasn’t too tired to glare though, which I did, often, getting nothing but his squinting eyes back. 

“Someone’s had a change in mood,” I comment finally, loftily so the rest of the group hears as well, mostly to avoid flat out screaming at him like I want to. 

“Lex just got his hit,” Mikey chirps playfully, a bit renewed in energy himself.

“You have a thing for danger?” I tease.

“It’s not dangerous when you know what you’re doing,” he knows he’s bragging because the tone he uses is sly. When I roll my eyes, he adds, “nothing like bursting out laughing after almost getting caught by militarized security.”

“It was nerves,” I jump to defend myself, but his eyes are still thin with a hidden smile, something devious slipping into the look, like that was exactly the response he was waiting for. I didn’t even want to imagine the ideas he was concocting, especially after seeing him climb a crane without so much as an unsteady hand. 

Maybe I should have just climbed the damn thing. I was cursing myself now for chickening out. The next thing he finds to climb could be even taller, then what? Well, nothing… I don’t have to agree to his dare. In fact, I hadn’t agreed. And I probably wouldn’t. Because I didn’t have a death wish.

But if I refused, he would be disappointed. That turns my stomach to think about. 

Pripyat doesn’t show itself until the sun has started to sink towards the horizon, and we’re suddenly at the base of the first apartment building. The foliage is so thick here, it completely consumes the concrete and hides the buildings like secret, lost temples in a jungle. Like it’s desperately trying to heal the dilapidation, branches and vines blanketing themselves over the ghostly city and making it rustle with life. 

I stop to stare breathlessly at the size of the first apartment, how buried in the forest it now was, and Lex pauses with me for another quip. “If you’d climbed, you’d have seen how close we were.”

“If I’d climbed, my fucking legs wouldn’t have made it here.” It’s a pretty good excuse, and he agrees with one of those chortles. I think he’s about to tease me further, but he surprises me instead. 

“You can rest soon now, Vulpiță. You did well.” 

It’s not frustration that stirs in my gut as he says it this time, and when I linger a little too long to try and figure out exactly what emotion was twisting up my insides, Mikey encourages us to keep moving. “We still need to go apartment shopping.”

I comply, getting my feet going again, keeping my eyes down as Lex follows after. 

We settle on a building, one of the tallest we can see from our position. Nine stories tall and nestled between some others in the same square, concrete Soviet-style, a barely there clearing that likely used to be a well-maintained courtyard circling the long-destroyed entrance. We scale the precarious staircase up to the top floor, then split up to find a room that isn’t infested with mold to live in for the next three days.

Mikey and Nico agree on a corner apartment that has windows to the west and south. It’s mostly bare save for some rubble that’s fallen off the walls over time. The bones of the building seem good and intact though, and the room is airy and as fresh as it can be. 

I’m so exhausted by the time we decide, I’m ready to forgo eating and just want to pass out. When I discard my bag like the others, and then shift to drop down with it, Lex catches me under my arm. “No resting yet. One more thing.”

I cannot help the whine I make in my throat. I’m jello though, and just like I could barely resist almost collapsing, I can’t fight him off when he leads me back out into the floor’s hallway. As I go, I give Nico and Mikey a look that screams at them to save me, but they just smirk at each other and return to unpacking their bags. 

“Can’t this wait. I’m going to die.” I finally manage an objection as he ushers me down to the end of the hall, up another staircase.

“I know. But it can’t wait.” He urges me forward with a hand between my shoulderblades, towards a questionably rusty ladder that leads to a hatch. 

“What could possibly be so important that it can’t wait for me to make a fucking meal first?” I complain, but comply, and start on the ladder. As I do, his hand lingers at the small of my back, and I’m thankful because I’m worried that if the ladder doesn’t give out on me, my legs will.

He helps me push the hatch open and the wind hits my face, making me flinch away from it first, before leaning closer for a inhale of the fresh air. We emerge onto the roof, and I sigh at the sight.

He answers finally, a satisfied smirk on his tone. “The sunset.”