He said he liked me.

Was I worthy of him liking me? Is it possible for someone to like me?

Those were the questions that kept me up all night. They were swimming in my head, making themselves at home.

Well, they were not the ones keeping me up. What was really keeping me up was my insomnia. I hadn't taken my sleeping pills yet, that's why I was still awake at midnight. The light was off and my eyes had adjusted to the darkness.

If I was a cloud, I'd know where I belonged. They had their place in the sky. They knew where they belonged, in the sky. Even though sometimes they just mindlessly floated from place to place, some fading, they belonged in the sky.

I don't know where I belong. Yes, I live on Earth. Yes, I live in my apartment. Yes, I once lived with my parents and sister.

That's not where I belong. In this planet called Earth, I don't know where I belong. It's a big world, but I don't know where I fit in. Do I fit in with the misfits? Or the pretenders and the haters? Do I fit in with the perfect people, who want perfection in everything they do?

The fact of the matter is that I don't know where I belong. This thought came to me when I went back to the office after having lunch with Chance. He told me a lot about himself. He was engaged, had a loving family and an amazing job. He was a satisfied man and he said if he died, he'd die a happy man.

I on the other hand, was a lost cause. Was I going to spend the rest of my life alone, or I'd someday find someone special?

To be honest, I wasn't getting any younger. I was getting old and I was going to have no legacy. I will have nothing that my family will remember me with when I'm gone. I had to get over what happened a few years ago and try to move on. And sleep was still not coming.

Maybe Chance wasn't asleep yet. Maybe he's struggling to fall asleep just like me.

I picked up my phone from the nightstand and dialed Chance's number. He gave them to me yesterday when we went back to the office.

He didn't pick up. Was he avoiding me or he's asleep?

I called again and again until I lost count. The phone kept on going straight to voicemail. Sighing with frustration, I put the phone down beside me on the bed and crossed my arms, glaring at it.

Time passed by and I was still glaring at the object on the bed. When I was about to pick it up and try to call again, it gave me a scare by lighting up and Chance's name flashing across the screen.

My heart skipped a beat in excitement that he wasn't ignoring me. Before he could hang up, I answered.

"Hello?" His voice was hoarse and groggy. It was buttered with heavy sleep. I even felt a bit guilty for waking him up.

"Hey," I said, my voice in contrast with his. Mine was fully awake and enthusiastic.

"Someone's energetic today. What's up?" He really tried to match my tone, but it was futile. Sleep was still so ever present in his tone and mind.

"Nothing. I just wanted to check up on you. How are you doing?" I mentally face-palmed. I knew that he was asleep, yet I went and asked that.

He had the audacity to chuckle, his voice sending chills down my spine. It was that kind that rumbled and vibrated in your ear.

"Hey, Chance. Tell me more about your fiancée," I don't know why I said that. Maybe it was curiosity. Do you know that curiosity was not the one that killed the cat? Ignorance did. They said that ignorance is bliss, hence the cat enjoyed it and it murdered the cat. It lured the cat with its blissful moments. Am I rambling? Yes I am.

His side was quiet. I thought he'd hung up, but he didn't as he replied, "Why are you asking?"

What surprised me was how awake he was compared to a few minutes ago. He sounded more defensive and protective.

Is it a sore subject for him? Maybe I hit a nerve. But when he told me yesterday that he had a fiancée, excitement was all that he radiated. Or maybe he was pretending. I squinted my eyes, straining to see beyond the darkness because I momentarily closed them. "Never mind. So, wha-"

"I'm sorry. I'm just a little uneasy talking about my fiancée. I feel like I'm gossiping about her. I'll tell you about her in a bit," he said.

Why didn't he want to tell me about his fiancée? I tried to rake my brain, but nothing surfaced. I cleared my throat because it was a bit tense on my part. Do I apologize or what?

"I-it's okay. I get what you mean," I didn't get what he meant at all. How is that gossiping when you are telling someone about your loved one? He could just ask me about my mother and I'd tell him everything without feeling shame or guilt.

That's just an excuse to cover up the fact that he didn't want to tell me. But he said he was going to tell me in a bit.

That bit turned into a few seconds and then minutes. I wanted to ask if he was still there, but I didn't want to disturb his train of thoughts.

The silence was too much that I wondered if he fell asleep on me.

"Chance? Are you still there?"

There was no reply. Tell me he wasn't sleeping.

"Chance? Stop playing with me. Talk to me, man! Chance?" I felt like I could scream his name or shake him up. I couldn't do that when we were kilometers away from each other.

I heard soft breaths coming from his side. What the hell? Is my voice that boring that it made Chance sleep?

I hung up and put the phone down on the nightstand. I stood up and got out of bed, lighting the light. It blinded me for a moment. I squinted my eyes until they adjusted to the light.

Maybe it's time I took my pills because tomorrow I had work. I had a presentation that I needed to present to my seniors. I asked Chance a while ago if he was going to be present in that meeting. He said he wasn't and I was relieved. Since I felt like I personally knew Chance, I would be embarrassed if I messed up the presentation. I wouldn't live my embarrassment down.

I exited my bedroom and went into the bathroom. I forgot to turn off the light in the bathroom. I went to the cabinet and picked out the bottle of zolpidem. Taking out two pills, I popped them in my mouth and closed the bottle. I put the bottle back in the cabinet and went to the washbasin to drink water to swallow the pills easily.

I splashed water on my face, releasing a long sigh. I could feel my eyes drooping, the drowsiness taking over. When I looked myself on the mirror, I saw double figures. My vision was blurring and my hands were getting heavy. I felt like my head was getting bigger than my body, crushing my neck because the neck couldn't handle the increased weight.

What's wrong with me? The pills usually took about five minutes to work, but now they were working immediately?

No, no. That's not right. I shook my head a little, trying to rid the sudden headache that had attacked me. I balanced myself against the bathroom wall, gripping the edge of the washbasin tightly.

Those were the same pills I took for a couple of weeks now and never reacted to them negatively. It was only the first few days that I felt nauseous and had loss of appetite. What's happening with me? This is torture at its finest.

I had my eyes closed tightly, afraid to even open them for a millisecond. I slid down the wall and onto the floor, sitting down. Even a slight movement worsened my headache. Why did I leave my phone in the bedroom?

Slowly but surely, I opened my eyes. The light pierced my eyes. It was like needles were injected into my eyes. I didn't close my eyes, but I wished I had.

I started to see black spots, my vision darkening. The headache increased tenfold and I was losing consciousness. I was slipping into a dark abyss, slowly sinking until I couldn't feel my senses. Until I became unconscious.