Helena

My vision was blurred by emotion, but I could still see Jader in front of me, his forehead touching mine. I could hear and feel his ragged breath, the faint warmth coming from his hands. I could feel his eternum fluctuation, just enough to keep him alive.

So many, many things came to the surface. Memories I thought I'd forgotten, ones that were still as vivid and clear as the day they were made. But there was something different in every memory; Jader and I were different in every memory.

Despite the unpleasant circumstances of the war, we still had a certain color, a certain inner glow. Now, I could no longer see that glow. We were the same people and yet, we were two different people. It wasn't just the few expression lines that had appeared, it wasn't the restrained eternum fluctuation, it wasn't the marks of torture. It was something much more hidden, much harder to see.

I touched his face, let his presence envelop me, and felt everything with all the love and affection in my heart. But something was missing. It didn't feel like the same love, not the same affection. Still, I wanted to hold onto this moment for a few more seconds, maybe minutes.

Rhythmic knocking came from my right. That thing had been standing there, with the same expressionless face since this morning. I felt cold claws tear through my skin and lodge themselves in my chest. Those dark eyes moved up and down my body, spreading a chill as if it were looking inside me. This feeling only passed when I averted my eyes, once again today.

"I'll let you two talk for a while."

Without waiting for an answer, he left and closed the door. I couldn't feel his eternum fluctuation, but I still knew where he was, even behind the wall. Something inside me could pinpoint his exact location, and my eyes followed him. I only noticed my hands were shaking when Jader took them.

"What happened?"

"His name is Fayn Itagral. You must have heard the guards talk about him."

Jader nodded silently. I took a deep breath before continuing; that thing could be listening, monitoring us.

"He wants to get us out of prison under three conditions: wear this bracelet, follow his orders, and be under his care. I…"

The words caught in my throat. All the hairs on my body stood on end and my fists clenched tightly. I felt my right arm go numb, just like back then.

"Helena?"

I shook my head; from his point of view, I must have been seriously messing with the wind. I took another deep breath; I've faced much worse before, a boy isn't going to shake me.

"I fought him."

"Of course you did." Jader had a carefree smile on his face. I hadn't paid attention to his reaction when I mentioned Fayn's objective, but now he seemed very relaxed.

"I lost. He used something strange, I didn't really see what it was. One second I was fine, the next there was a hole in my arm. But the feeling was familiar."

All expression hardened on Jader's face; I still remember the last day I saw him with that exact look. His eyebrows were drawn together, his eyes narrowed and attentive to my every detail, his mouth no longer curved in a smile and was held straight without any flex. When he spoke, his voice was flat, as if a machine were talking to me.

"It's impossible. We both know that very well."

"You saw the resemblance with your own eyes, not to mention the age matches, but he doesn't seem to know much. Hogan must have thought of this; he's still the Governor. Fayn said he was abandoned in the first week of life."

I could see the effort he made as he let his gaze fall. The gears in his brain would be smoking from his ears if this were a cartoon. I drew a breath to continue what I wanted to say, but the door opened and my whole body reacted with urgency.

I looked at who was entering. It was that thing, its straight black strands swayed with the movement and fell in two locks on either side of its face. Its apathetic, dark gaze swept the room. I still couldn't feel its fluctuation.

"I apologize, but Hogan wants to speed things up and there are still two more to visit. I imagine Helena has told you the conditions."

Jader nodded.

"Wear the bracelet, follow your orders, and be under your care."

"You can also make one request of me, any request, before or after the mission is complete. Helena chose to leave her request for after the mission was completed."

Jader maintained eye contact with Fayn; I felt the shiver in his body through our joined hands on my lap. A drop of sweat trickled down the side of his face, making its way slowly until it dripped from his chin. What is he waiting for?

"I don't know if you heard me correctly, there's more…"

"I want you to guarantee the protection of the War Lords."

The thing's head tilted to the side and it placed its hands behind its back. The open jacket allowed me to see his white shirt with the top two buttons undone. He was so relaxed, so casual, so familiar…

"I cannot guarantee that. Would you like to make another request?"

"I want you to guarantee the protection of my companions. I don't know what they've told you…"

"What they told me doesn't matter now. I simply have no way of guaranteeing your safety."

"You don't know why Hogan wants to free us, do you?"

The head was still tilted to the right. There was no eternum fluctuation, no blink, no muscle contraction, nothing. It remained still, just as it had at the end of our fight. The same pale skin, the same emotionless gaze; it looked like a marble statue.

When it moved, I immediately gasped and widened my eyes; my whole body went rigid. With every step it took, I wanted to get up and leave. Fayn's foot tapped when he reached the table, his gaze never leaving Jader. However, at some point, Jader had lowered his head, his hands holding mine tightly.

"Tell me, is there any rational reason to guarantee your safety?"

My mouth moved faster than my thoughts.

"You need us. I don't know if it's because of Inferno or some other problem, but you need us. What good would it do to free us and throw us to the wolves?"

The onyx eyes focused on me. I felt the cold touch my skin, but it was a different cold from the prison. It was a cold that came from the inside out. Like a warning, a scream from my body to me.

Sweat ran down the nape of my neck and down my spine. What's the point of being afraid here? What was it inside me that feared this man? He didn't seem angry, I hadn't disobeyed his orders either, I just answered a question. Not even Dália was so… she was.

"You have a point. A good point. Alright, I will do what I can to protect them."

A second of silence filled the room before the calm, measured voice was heard once more.

"You seem worried, Helena. Does my presence bother you?"

My heart skipped a beat when I processed what he said. What answer should I give? If I told the truth, would he get angry?

I can't say again that he looks like Dália, not even to warn him. He wouldn't believe me, or would he? Violet might be able to get that into his head, but I can't blindly trust her either.

"You look a lot like our leader. It brings some memories to the surface."

"You've said that about twice today. They must be bad memories, I see. I apologize, but this is the face I have. Looking more like a woman has never caused me this kind of problem before."

I managed to see a scowl form on Jader's face; one must have formed on mine too. What did he mean by that? I thought it was just me who found him very feminine. This kind of problem… is he thinking that… no, he must have that kind of information on file about us.

"I don't think I understood what you said," Jader said, picking up the bracelet placed in front of him on the table.

Fayn let out a laugh? A laugh?

"I think I've said too much. You'll meet Alissia at some point; ask her about it."

Just as he did with me, he replenished Jader's eternum using the environment. He was still pale and thin, but the marks on his body and the dark circles around his eyes had diminished significantly. And I still couldn't feel that thing's fluctuation.

What's wrong with him? Everything that is alive, even the grass, has a level of fluctuation. During our fight, the entire way here, I felt nothing. Even being the greatest manipulator of eternum, the internal flow should still exist. When I was fighting him, I should have at least felt the internal flow, or seen his trail, but he seemed not to exist in this thing. That would characterize him as dead.

"Any problems? As I said, we need to pick up the pace. Of course, you can use the bathroom; I'm not a tyrant."

"Nothing." I checked Jader's bracelet. "Let's just go see the last two. Who's next?"

He turned around as Jader and I stood up. The golden pentagon on the back of his coat reflected the lamplight and shone like a mirror. My left arm was tugged slightly and Jader leaned in.

"Perhaps he could be."

"The eternum flux."

Jader agreed with me; he seemed to have returned to reality very well. I'll still need to observe him better in the coming days; I'll help him with whatever he needs. This time, I will help all of them.

"Perhaps I could be what?"

A simple question made two experienced warriors freeze like children caught cutting in line. The thing didn't look back, it just held the doorknob, looking down.

"We prefer to keep our theories to ourselves for now."

"Jader, if your theories involve my well-being, I would like you to share them."

"It's not about your well-being. It's more of an observation about your eternum control. It's impressive."

Every one of my muscles and bones stiffened as the thing's head rose to look forward, at the door. Its silhouette gave me a strange sensation; it wasn't fear, but it was the same cold as before, and it was the same thing that knew its location all the time.

I knew very well it wasn't fear, it couldn't be. Even though it felt very similar. And it was familiar. Where have I felt this before? Every cell in my body seemed to recognize what it was, but the memory didn't exist.

He opened the door and forced us to follow him.

"Let's go to Violet now."

Jader exchanged looks with me; I think the same thought was running through his mind. It was too soon. Even so, this brought many more possibilities.

What is the intention behind the order we were chosen to be freed? It was obvious that to free Jader, I needed to be present; I was the strongest link to reality that could be presented to him. Meanwhile, I would only need a brief warm-up.

Freeing Violet after the two of us didn't seem right. How could this influence Kusog? Better yet, how does this order influence Violet? There's only one person in the world who could directly convince Violet, but she's dead.

Would Fayn have any idea how to convince Violet? He is an Itagral… but if he knew that, he would have asked me other questions. The order was defined by Hogan. He ordered our release, gave the order, and told him to speed up. What is his goal?

What's the reason for me being first? Is this some kind of hint? Kusog would make more sense considering our relationships as a group. He wanted me to be thoughtful. That old fox wants to test me before revealing our mission. No, perhaps he wants to test me now, and Fayn is his observer?

The mission… What would end our imprisonment? Why an Itagral? Why, of all things, this thing?

I noticed Fayn's reflection in a metal box in the corner of the hallway. He was looking at me, looking inside me. My eternum flux was out of the ordinary.

When I regained my control and my flux returned to normal, he looked ahead.

He noticed. Then and now.