Days had gone by, and I was still alone. No-one following me, not even from afar. I know it's weird of me to want someone to follow me, and honestly normally I wouldn't. However…There was something comforting with that angel following me…Was it just because they were an angel.. Or was it something else?

Classes were over, but instead of going back straight home, I went and took a detour. Near the university was a huge bridge over a river, I walked there to clear my thoughts.

When I arrived, I stood in front of the metal fence, staring off to the somewhat clear water. The day was depressing as usual with no-one to talk to. I wished there could be at least someone I could exchange some words with, but people usually give me disgusted looks. Is there something wrong with my looks? Or the way I talk? I wonder about those things often…Yet I am never given an answer to those.

The water looks so nice… So peaceful. I bet it would feel nice if I was swimming in it, letting the water embrace me whole….

It didn't take long for me to feel as if my vision was blurring and my reason thinning… I feel so tired…

"…."

"H-huh--!?"

I was brought back to senses when I felt someone clasp my hand tightly. I looked up to meet the angel from before wearing an angry expression.

"..You- Mortal…!" They yelled out. "Get a grip..!" They were pulling my hand and that's when I realised I was hanging by a thread, the river now directly under me. I was stunned, when did I jump off? Was I pushed down?

"Stop moving so much!" The angel yelled out once more and finally pulled me back to the ground.

The cold and dirty asphalt has never felt this good under my hands. I nervously looked back at the angel, all on their fours and heavily panting.

"Wh- what just happened..?" I couldn't control my shaky voice.

The angel looks at me, I couldn't tell if they were angry or worried. They put their hand on their chest while the other supports them as they get up. They seemed to ground themselves as they gently brush off the dirt off their off-white dress.  "I leave for a short while and you already mangaed this much…" They sigh. "Get up. How long are you going to stay sitting there?"

Their tone was harsh, but they extended their hand and helped me up. Their hand was cold, yet felt so warm. I can't remember the last time someone had ever helped me in any circumstance… Anyhow, despite turning their back at me when they guided me home, that was the most warmth I've felt in my twenty years of living. 

When we managed to get back home, it was quiet and awkward. They didn't wait for me to take my shoes off or anything, just headed to the living room. Next thing I knew, there we were, sitting across each other in silence in my messy living room. I was too nervous to speak first. Firstly I was in front of the person I liked, the person who also saved me, and that same person who currently had a murderous aura around them despite being an angel.

"Did…" I decided to break the silence. "Did I try to… um.. Commit-" The word was hard to get out. Yes, the thought has been ringing inside of my head… But I swear, I wasn't trying to do it there or then…

The angel sighs. "It seems like you were," Their were eyes dancing around my face as if trying to look for something, then they let out another sigh. "Yet it seems like that wasn't what you were trying to do?"

I blinked in surprise. Did they read my mind? I nodded.

"Well, there are some things we need to set straight now." They push back their hair, their cold eyes locked to mine. "I'm an Angel from the Heavens. God has bestowed the name 'Micah' onto me, so you may call me that."

'Micah..' 'Micah...' I kept repeating their name in my head. Despite all the bad that had happened until now, I couldn't help but feel a little happy knowing more about them after all this time.

"U-um, I am-" Micah put their finger up towards me and sushed me.

"As your guardian angel, I know of you already, Skyler. I've been watching you closely as of late,"

"S-should you be telling me all of this…?"

They raise an eyebrow at my question. "I wouldn't be if I didn't recieve permission from God… Your recent… behaviour and you being able to see me, has changed the circumstances."

Everything Micah seemed to tell me started making sense, except for one.

I look at them with slight suspicion. "Were… you the one who pushed me?"

They blinked at my question, as if I had said something stupid. "Oh my God. You did not. Did you just accuse me of doing something sinful?"

"…But I was only looking at the river, how could I fall down on my own?"

Micah raised their eyebrow, looking at me like the answer was obivous. We stayed silent for a moment but then my anxiety started to spark up from it.

"…Um s-someone else pushed me… and you helped me up…?"

They pinched the bridge of their nose. "If only things were that simple." Micah sighed then looked at me dead in the eye. "Your self-destructive thoughts have reached the demons and the other malicious spirits. They've quite literally been feeding on the negativity you're emmitting. And now? Now they want you-" Micah puts their finger above my heart. And now they were very close to me and while keeping the eye contact. I could honestly stare at them all day-. "They want you, your body, your mind- your soul. Do you understand what I'm getting at?"

What…negative thoughts? "A-are you saying that I- I'm dying…?"

They hummed, leaning backwards. "Well, if were speaking from a human's perspective, then yes, it might seem that way. But- More specifically, you have an army of beings that now want you dead. To posess you, that is." They rest their hand on their cheek. "So if we are speaking based on that, only if you get posessed, you die."

Micah said all that in a calm tone, no sense of danger or urgency in sight. I suppose that was what baffled me the most, I couldn't help but make a horrified expression. How many of these scenarios have they gone through to be this calm and collected?

Micah sighed and pushed back their short white hair. "No need to be so panicked. After all, I'm here to help you." They said in a cool but confident manner.
 

That sentence sparked something in me. Yeah, Micah was here for me. I felt more at ease. Enthusiastically I reached out to hold their hand. "R-really..? You'll s-stay here, with me? F-forever?"

They made a face and calmly pulled their hand away and stood up, hands on their waist. "Hah, forever? Of course not." Micah said bluntly. "You heard me say they fed off your negativity, yes?"

Ouch, that kind of hurt. "Y-yes.."

"Now we need to just get you," They pointed at me. "back on track, meaning I'm going to help you find structure in your life and help get you back in society."

"…" My shoulders slumped. I don't know what I was expecting. Is the way I'm living that bad. I mean, yes, I didn't have friends and talking to people was hard… But I got this far without anybody. Was what they really saying actually the answer to the problem…?

I looked at them meekly, I couldn't bring myself to ask all of that. "…C-can't you just stay with me?"

Arms still on the hips, Micah looked at me, raising their eyebrow. "What?"

The way they looked at me gave me the shivers. "I- I mean that… If you stay with me… I t-think that I'll be okay…" My voice started to falter. "U-um… I don't think what you said… is the answer.."

My gaze was now on the floor, though I hadn't noticed until Micah lifted my chin to meet their eyes. "…At least look at me when you're talking." A slight frown appeared on their face. "You questioning me is expected, but not needed." Their tone firm. "I need you to be able to trust me and my words if you desire to live."

Do I want to live…? My gaze goes elsewhere but Micah yanks my chin back to them.

"Answer me. Skyler."

":..I…"

"Skyler. I can only help you if that's what you want,"

'If that's I want…?' I don't know what I want. Have I ever wanted anything up until now? Even if I wanted something, could I really go out my way and ever reach my goal? All my life, I've believed, that I could never do anything, that what I wanted didn't matter…

But what if… Like Micah said… was I allowed to desire more out of my pathetic life…?

"Skyler?"'

I want to give this a proper try this time… "Y-yes..!" My voice came out a bit louder than intended.

The corner of their lips curved upwards and they let go of my chin. "Good boy."

I tensed up at the word that came out of their mouth. It made me feel excited at heart, maybe a little too excited…

They stood over me, looming above me with, looking taller than me despite being on the shorter side. Looking as heavenly as alway, a look as if plotting something.

"You have a lot to do now. Think only about your own growth, and forget about anything and anyone else." A slight smile apparing on their face.