Nathalie slightly hesitated before she stepped back into the store. Looking back at Tobias I Immediately recognised that there was something more to their relationship than I originally thought. Tobias and Philip did apparently fight because of her, but in his look towards her I saw something completely different than when he looked at Philip. Instead of resentment there was this sadness and grief in his eyes. At the time I didn't know enough to recognize what it exactly was, but I knew it was something a quick chat couldn't explain.

After a moment he looked back at me again. The annoyance and carelessness returning in a flash. Without saying another word to each other I just walked back into the store. Something told me no matter what I said to him I wouldn't be able to convince him leave.

We finished up by going into other stores and like Lola said, bought some coffee and tea while we did the rest of the shopping. Unlike Jules wanted, Nathalie and I didn't speak much the whole time. After it was all done it was time to get back home.

Although at the time I didn't really admit it to myself a part of me hoped Nathalie would suddenly turn around at the last minute and ask me to talk… or at least give me her phone number. But nothing. She just said goodbye like she did to anyone else and… left.

So, I was all alone standing in the town square holding a few shopping bags I didn't really care for. As much as I was used to it, I didn't really like being alone. It felt too quiet, too intimate, too empty.

To my relief I spotted someone dragging their bike along like they usually did. Rudoslav. But that time his bike wasn't empty, it was filled with small boxes of flowers. Huh, maybe a normal person would think that the flower problem solved itself, but not me. For me it seemed really convenient that just as I wanted to start looking into things flowers suddenly show up in town. I quickly walked up to Rudoslav. He did a double take, his eyes locking in on the shopping bags in my hands.

"You went shopping?", he wondered.

"Lola.", I quickly added, "What are you doing?"

He glanced at his bike filled with flowers and back at me. "Working."

That was the day I found out about Rudoslav's new after school job. During the weekend he would delivery flowers to people in town. What I found the most weird about it was that there were people ordering flowers in a small town. Is this town really so flower obsessed?

"Do you need any help?", I wondered while still trying to get on his good side.

He thought for a moment before sighing and looking down at his watch. Oh, he definitely did need help.

He explained: "I just need to bring the rest of this to the addresses listed on the box-"

I immediately took one of the boxes and threw my bags in its place. Looking at the addresses listed on it I quickly knew who ordered them.

"I'll be right back!", I called out while I was already half way there.

Getting all the flowers to all the different houses was actually kind of fun. While Rudoslav slowly made his way to each house I made it my mission to deliver more flowers than he would. The first box was easy, it was to Mr. James' home not too far away from the town square. The second was a bit further away and third even further. After a while I didn't really walk anymore, I was running. Making sure Rudoslav couldn't even keep up with his bike.

Finally, when it started to get dark there were only 2 boxes left. The score for the day was 4 - 3. I just needed to deliver those two and I would have achieved my mission.

I huffed for air as I made it to him. The cold air stinking my lungs as my leg cramped from all the running with heavy boxes I did, but I tried my best to hide it all… apparently not well enough.

"I can do the rest. You should get home and rest.", he tried to reassure.

I quickly disagreed while trying to get out the second box. "No, no. I'm fine! I just need to walk it off!"

Walk off a leg cramp caused by running. Great idea, Fifi. He obviously saw through my stupid remark and tried to reassure me once again: "Fifi, I'm serious. I don't need your help anymore. It's just two more deliveries."

"Perfect! Two more. I can do that.", I smiled as I got the box of flowers out of his bike.

"No, you can't.", he swiftly stopped me.

"I just need to-", he cut me off while trying to get the box out of my hands: "Fifi! Seriously, what's up with you?!"

I tried my best to pull the box away from him. He wasn't going to stop me. No way. Not when I was so close.

"I'm not doing anything!", I scoffed while still trying to get the box out of his grip. Although I tried to hide it I was clearly beginning to panic a little. At the time I didn't really understand why.

He didn't back down. "You've been acting weird every since winter break ended!"

At that moment I began to really panic. He was really close to getting the box away from me and now he called me weird. It was like at that moment something snapped within me.

I raised my voice: "No, I haven't! Just let me help-!"

"No! Just back off already!", he hissed as he snapped the box out of my hands.

The force from our struggle made him stumble back enough for him to drop the box to the ground, making all the flowers fly out. I didn't waste even a single second to breath before continuing to dig my own grave.

"I just don't want you to hate me anymore!", I yelled out.

We both stared at each other for a moment. That was the first time in a while I let my anger get a hold of me and it didn't feel great. It definitely didn't feel great to see Rudoslav flinch away from me before staring at me like I was a complete weirdo.

He took a breath before replying in a gentle tone: "I don't hate you."

His words just flew passed me. Maybe I was still filled with anger or my brain just didn't want to understand what he was saying, but the reason doesn't really matter, what matters is that I snapped in that moment. I pulled on my jacket, desperate to find something to ground me.

I was a mumbling, stuttering, hissing mess. "But I put you all in danger! You hate me for it! I know you do! People got hurt because I was reckless and you didn't want to be there!" That's what I at least could somewhat understand from my own ramblings. Rudoslav was probably struggling to understand anything I was saying.

"Fifi!", his voice snapped me out of my thoughts.

He slowly nodded for a moment before he noted: "You're right. You were reckless and you did put us all in danger. You dragged me into that place.", he paused, "But I don't hate you for it. You made a mistake. Anyone could do that."

A mistake. Is that what getting a person killed and others injured is called? A mistake? I always knew Rudoslav had a strong moral compass, but I didn't think he would apply it like that. I wasn't even sure how to respond.

All I could think to say was: "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. I never should've had brought you with me."

My voice cracked a little. I apologized a bunch of times before. Especially after what happened it felt like I've done it a million times, but it was always for what I did overall, never for one single action. The images of him being scared that night, him telling me to get back up, him warning me, repeated in my mind over and over again. I felt so stupid for not listening to him, and I couldn't imagine what he felt like about it all.

Suddenly, I felt arms around me. I never really liked to be hugged, I didn't even liked being touched, but that time it felt… warm, comforting even. I couldn't believe he would give me a chance to explain myself, let alone hug me. I imagined it all going differently, I thought I would have to comfort him. But I guess life is full of surprises.

After a moment I sniffled while still not letting go: "I'll do anything to make it up to you. If it's even possible."

He pulled away and looked at his almost empty bike and back at me. "This is definitely a start.", he chuckled.

I couldn't help but laugh with him. Yeah, maybe I overdid it that day. I took my shopping bags out of his bike and just before I was going to say goodbye he cut in.

"You know, you should also talk to Nathalie."

I froze. Did… did he knew what happened? No, no way! He would immediately tell Philip and that would mean…

The only noise I was able to let out was: "Huh?"

He smiled, clearly believing I knew exactly what he was talking about, which made my heart skip a beat.

He explained: "You two have been really cold to each other lately. Basically everyone has noticed it. Even Philip and he is practically blind to social cues."

I let out a breathy giggle from relief. He didn't know, thank goodness. I tried my best to seem as none suspicious as possible. "Oh, Nathalie is just being Nathalie."

"You're also acting weird. You've been more hostile to her.", he cut in.

Okay, maybe I've been overdoing it a little bit, but it's not like she hasn't done anything wrong.

Before I could say anything back he already started pushing. "What's going on?"

"Uh… Nothing. We just had… a small fight." I shrugged while trying not to cringe at myself trying to lie. I was still awful at it.

Rudoslav stared at me for a moment. Yeah, he was definitely not buying it. But then he showed me another one of his principles.

"Alright. You don't want to talk about it, I get it.", he noted.

Right. When he didn't know what was going on between Nathalie and Philip he acted the same way. Just accepting someone else's business was not his. I should have thought of that before starting to panic.

He still added: "But I think you should talk it out with her. Philip and I fight a lot but we're always able to reconcile over a short conversation."

I don't think we can reconcile this.

"Thanks for the advice.", I smiled sarcastically.

He immediately got my sarcasm and instead tried to give me another piece of advice: "Okay, at least stop being so rude to her, unless you want to make her hate you."

Hate me? I scoffed in my mind. It was Nathalie North we were talking about. That girl had a huge crush on me, there was no way she could start hating me…

Right?

I had been so focused on her trying to forget about her feelings that I didn't even consider her trying to change her feelings… and I was acting complicit in it all. If acting rude to her didn't work maybe trying to do the same thing I did with Rudoslav would, which would mean being… nice to her.

Suddenly I felt something at the back of my neck, a sort of chill. I instinctively started looking around but didn't see anything weird. Strange, I could have sworn I felt like someone was watching me.

Rudoslav's look told me everything, he felt it too. So, we proceeded to act like two seven year olds and we ran out of there as fast as possible. Although we both couldn't help but laugh together as we ran.