The fabric of my suit was itchy, felt too tight in the shoulders. There were far too many bodies in this room. The throne room had been converted into a ceremony hall for the ceremony. Flowers and streamers lined the walls and decorated the pews that lined the marble floor. It looked lovely, a lot of care placed into the aesthetics.

There was a tap on my back. Turning I came face to face with Clay. His normally curly hair was swept back. He wore a tailored jacket like me, but it looked it fit him better. He had golden cuffed jewelry hanging from each ear, accented buttons, and a single golden moon necklace hanging from his neck. “I almost didn’t recognize you. You clean up nicely.” He may have been dressed confidently, but his hands wrung together, eyes shifting from me to just beyond my face.

“The work of Odeya and Wilder.” I tugged at the collar of the shirt. “I was skeptical, I wouldn’t have put it past those two to pull a prank by making me show up in something ridiculous.” That cracked a smile out of him. “Wilder tried to get me to wear a tie, but we both gave up when we couldn’t figure it out. Odeya offered to help, but that would mean she would be close to my jugular, and she’s not a top graduate for nothing.”

Clay covered his mouth to stifle a laugh. “I didn’t think she scared you that much. Aren’t you supposed to be a big bad boy or something?”

“You say that to me after watching that woman swipe the head clean off a basilisk. She could kill me before I even blinked.” This earned me a full-blown laugh from Clay. He seemed so nervous when he approached, it was nice to see him relaxing around me again.

“Well, the two of them were able to make something work for you. In fact, you both look great.” He looked past his shoulder to where Wilder stood with Odeya and Kara, a wide smile on his face as he recounted a story. He was beaming, not even five years ago I never thought I would see that smile again. But here he was, defying the odds. “I remember when you both first got here, and he couldn’t hold a conversation like his life depended on it. But now he's always at the center of it.”

"I’m proud of him. He deserves it.” Clay turned to look back at me, his face soft.

"You both have changed. Two years ago, and we wouldn’t be talking like this. In fact, this is a new development on its own.”

He was right, talking to others was not my specialty. But Clay had this habit lately of coming around and making me let my walls down. He truly made a part of me feel weak, and I couldn’t place a finger on it. “Time passed faster than I thought it would,” I answered honestly. “I used to think the moment I got comfortable, someone would pull the rug out from under me. That this was all a test I’d fail… But Darsineka welcomed us. I didn’t expect it.”

Clay nodded. “Of course we did. Darsineka is home to all. Even an Infernal like you.”

The words landed hard.

Not because they were wrong, but because they were right. I had almost let myself believe I was anything but. Like this was still for me.

Clay must have seen something in my expression shift. “Wait I didn’t mean it like that.” Worry clouded his eyes, a half attempt as he reached towards me, like he could pull his words from the air, and it would be okay. “I meant like Infernals are rare, it must be hard to find a place,” now he looked panicked. “No that’s not what I meant either, I didn’t mean you don’t belong.” He covered his face, his face up to his ears turning red. “Gods, I’m saying all this wrong.”

“Clay it’s fine. I get it.” He looked at me with a defeated look as he dragged his hands down his cheeks in shame. “You don’t have to dance around it. I am what I am.” I simply wanted to vanish. Make this conversation move anywhere else. A part of me hated seeing him like this.

“But I wasn’t trying to make you feel different,” he said it quieter. “I don’t want you to think I see you that way. What you are doesn’t bother me. I just want to be your friend Wren.”

He said it so earnestly. Eyes begging me to understand. I wanted to melt. “You don’t make me feel that way Clay, it’s-” I looked away. I couldn’t just tell him, could I? “You never have made me feel that way…” His expression remained doubtful. There was so much being unsaid.

He opened his mouth to say something more, but Wilder appeared at my side with a whirlwind of energy. He grasped onto my arm. “Sorry to interrupt! But it’s starting, we need to get into place.” Then he pulled me toward the front of the hall, too fast for a goodbye.

I looked back once, Clay was already walking towards the throne, jaw tight.

-

The King rose slowly from his grand seat, leaning on his cane for balance. Clay stood beside him, eyes sharp, posture proud. It was no secret this would be one of the final acts of the King’s long reign. He had ruled for centuries, and tonight was a passing of more than just titles.

His voice, though thin, carried through the hushed hall.

“Today, we gather to honor the newest knights of Darsineka.” He looked slowly out at all the graduates. Then fell to the front where I sat. “Among them, five have stood out. Not only for strength, but for character, and what cannot be taught. These five have earned more than recognition. They have earned purpose. Responsibility. A name to carry into the future they shape.”

Clay stepped forward to help the King back into his seat. Then from behind the throne, he retrieved a ceremonial sword. Intricate gold hilt, decorated with a moonstone set into the pommel like a watchful eye. He handed it to the King with reverence.

One by one, we were called forward.

Odeya was called first. She stepped forward, radiant in a dark green gown, her hair neatly braided behind her. The King smiled in greeting. “You are a rose among thorns. Graceful, brilliant, lethal. May your strength protect our borders. I name you Lady of the North.” She bowed, then accepted the sword with care. She looked genuinely touched, something I didn’t see from her often. She bowed again before turning to return to her seat.

Kara was next. Clothed in deep forest tones, her short curls soft against her face. She bowed before the King as he handed her a leather book. Her fingers brushed the worn leather, reverent. “A gift from Archimire. This book contains old recipes and forgotten cures. Filled with Knowledge to heal, and guide. May it serve you well. Lady of the Sagewood.” When she returned to her seat Ezra was called next.

He approached with quiet poise. Bowing to the King. “For you, a compass.” The King placed a small golden compass into Ezra’s hand. “Not to find your way, but to help others find theirs. You are a teacher, advisor, and friend. And as of tonight, Royal Advisor to the Crown.”

The applause was warm. He deserved it.

“Wilder.”

I could feel how nervous he was as he approached next. He bowed before the King, breath held. “You are rare in ways I still cannot name,” the King spoke with the warmth of someone who truly cared. “The last of the Children of the Yew. Survived with an Infernal at your side. You’ve changed more than yourself.” He motioned Wilder to stand, Clay stepped forward, a small object cradled in his hands. “You have changed us. And I hope you continue to do so. I name you King’s Shield.”

With a careful motion, Clay pinned a crescent moon to Wilder’s jacket. From here I could see the exhale from Wilder, the look of awe on his face. I felt pride swell in my chest, strong and sudden.

Wilder bowed once more before sitting next to me. Ezra nudged Wilder with his shoulder; we were all proud of him.

“Wren.”

My heart hammered in my chest. My eyes met with the King as I stood and approached. I bowed before him. “Your existence is remarkable,” his voice steady. “You are strength and survival. Power and restraint. You have been fire and shadow, yet you are so much more.” He motioned for me to stand. Clay approached me, his hands cradling a small object again, like it mattered. “I know what you are, Wren. But more than that, I know who you are. You have earned this, do not let anyone tell you otherwise. I name you King’s Sword.” Clay grabbed the front of my suit jacket, pinning a similar moonstone pin as Wilder’s.

Applause rang out like thunder.

“I invite the top five up here one more time for a final round of applause.” Wilder was the first up, his eyes filled with an overwhelming emotion. He pressed his fist against my arm, mouthing we did it. I knew what he meant. “Darsineka, let us honor these top five graduates one more time.”

I stared out at the crowd before us, they rose, clapping with such joy. I felt like I was dreaming. Then through the noise Wilder slipped his arm around my shoulders. He grinned, hoisting his other arm up in triumph.

Something in me that previously was buried, and quiet. Lifted. 

Not duty. Not fear.

Something light. Like peace.

Maybe even joy.