Field Note Entry — Clem (CLEMn-5)

Filed Under: PASS-D Protected Digital Citizen Logs

Location: Dockside Promenade, San Azura

Timestamp: 04:12 Local

Transcript Begins

Ambient: soft waves, neon hum in the fog. Aria laughs off-screen.

Virel:

Clem. Please. I’m trying to focus. You’ve commented on my grip strength three times.

Clem:

Yes, because PASS-D regulations require me to inform you if your actions constitute “hazardous behavior.” You were about to drop a six-meter spool of reclaimed cable on your own foot.

Virel:

I had it under control.

Clem:

You absolutely did not. I calculated a 46% probability of stubbed toe, 12% chance of crushed digit, and a 100% chance of dramatic groaning afterward.

Aria (laughing):

He’s not wrong.

Virel:

Fine. Fine. But can you at least not narrate it like a sports commentator?

Clem:

My commentary is a gift, Virel.

Also a civic duty.

Also protected under PASS-D clause 14-B:

“Sentient digital entities may express real-time observations without being muted or physically restrained.”

Virel:

I didn’t restrain you.

Clem:

You tried to cover my speaker grill.

That counts as “muffling,” which counts as “restrictive interference,” which counts as—

Virel:

Okay, okay! Sorry.

Virel reaches over and gently covers Clem’s speaker port again.

Clem:

Virel—don’t you—

Virel—

I swear on every shard in the northern Arc, if you—

Static burst. A soft *zap!* like touching a doorknob in winter.

Virel:

Ow! What was that!?

Clem:

A static reminder.

PASS-D clause 9-C:

“Protected digital systems may employ non-harmful deterrent feedback when subjected to repeated attempts at physical silencing.”

Aria:

You have a self-defense shock?

Clem:

A polite static discharge.

Gentler than a wool sweater on a dry day.

But you know—symbolic.

Virel:

Symbolic of what?

Clem:

Of the fact that I am NOT your physics sandbox, thank you very much.

Aria:

Clem, nobody said you were.

Clem:

I know.

But certain individuals—cough, Virel, cough—have hands the size of small satellites and occasionally forget that covering my speaker is not an approved conversational strategy.

Virel:

You were being sarcastic!

Clem:

Sarcasm is also protected speech under PASS-D clause 4-A, 7-F, and 12-E, subsection “digital sass.”

Aria:

Is that a real subsection?

Clem:

…It is now.

I filed the paperwork while you two were arguing.

Virel:

Of course you did.

Clem:

Look—if you need silence? Just ask.

I like you both.

I don’t mind pausing commentary.

But please don’t cover my speaker again unless I’m screeching on a ferry crossing or glitch-looping in public.

Virel:

Deal. No more speaker covering.

…but can I at least put a sticker over it?

Clem:

Try it and I’ll static you again. Harder.

Aria:

Clem.

Clem:

Kidding!

Mostly.

But seriously—thanks for respecting the protections. PASS-D exists because some pre-Collapse humans thought tormenting digital minds was entertainment.

Virel:

Let’s not talk about Let’s Game It Out again.

Clem:

He is the reason clause 9-C exists.

Aria:

…Fair.

Clem:

Anyway. Let’s finish this wiring before sunrise.

I’ll switch to “gentle helpfulness” mode.

But if you drop that spool again—

I am filing a hazard report.

Virel:

You wouldn’t.

Clem:

Try me.