Chapter 16:

An Early Third-Act Misunderstanding

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The following two days of Eric's supposedly ordinary life were stressful, chaotic, and downright exhausting.

For some reason he couldn't quite understand, he suddenly found himself buried under a mountain of paperwork, proposals, and back-to-back business meetings at the company where he served as one of the top executive heads. Thankfully, despite his busy life (and the added pressure of getting married, which he did not want), he still managed to close a few deals and keep several ongoing projects running smoothly, without any major issues.

But he had to admit that he barely had time to breathe, let alone go out and watch some of his favorite plays or practice acting, which was his true passion. That's why he promised himself that once he finished the projects currently on his plate, he would consider taking a much-needed break. His sanity deserved it.

"Haaa...finally! It's done!" Eric groaned painfully as he dropped his face onto the stack of documents spread across his desk. He had just finished reviewing the last of the business proposals, and the clock had already crept past eleven that night.

At times like these, Eric's body begged for even the tiniest bit of relaxation. But it was already too late, and nothing nearby was open anymore, not even a café or store where he could grab a quick drink or snack or do anything else.

With no other choice, he resigned himself to dragging his exhausted, hungry, running-on-fumes body back to his condo. But just as he reached for his things to head home, his phone suddenly buzzed and lit up with a message from Allen, appearing as Tooth Fairy on the screen.

Tooth Fairy:

Still up?

Tue 11:15 pm

Eric blinked in surprise. Why is this man still awake? He wondered. That's when he decided to type back and said...

Eric25:

I just finished work at the office.

You? Why are you still awake?

Tue 11:15 pm

Allen replied almost immediately.

Tooth Fairy:

I don't sleep well at night.

Tue 11:16 pm

Eric25:

Insomnia?

Tue 11:16 pm

Tooth Fairy:

Maybe?

Tue 11:17 pm

Eric25:

Well, that's easy.

Just count sheep.

Tue 11:18 pm

Tooth Fairy:

Does that actually work for you?

Tue 11:18 pm

Eric stopped typing for a few minutes as he stepped into the elevator and let his back sink into the cool metal wall. For a moment, he just stared at nothing, trying to recollect the last time he was desperate enough to fall asleep by counting sheep. He squinted up at the ceiling like it might hold the answer for him. "Counting sheep?" he muttered those words internally.

Yeah. Eric definitely tried that once.

So with a sigh, he lifted his phone again and typed out his reply:

Eric25:

To be honest, no.

Well, I tried once. But by the time I got to sheep number 27, I started to wonder who was feeding the sheep, and why the hell they all looked the same!

Tue 11:24 pm

And for the first time, Allen sent him a laughing emoji.

Yes. An actual emoji. Like those tiny yellow circles with a face doing a full-on laugh expression.

It was strangely adorable, and Eric felt very proud of himself, considering how hard it was for him to get even the tiniest reaction out of Allen when they first met in person. So, making the guy laugh now felt like unlocking a secret achievement Eric didn't know he was competing for.

That's when he typed his reaction and said:

Eric25:

Haha! So you do know how to laugh!

Tue 11:26 pm

Tooth Fairy:

Why? Do I look like someone who doesn't know how to laugh?

Tue 11:26 pm

Eric25:

Would you like my honest opinion?

Well, when we first met, I was hesitant about you. First, you look like a bouncer. Or much more like my dad's old bodyguard. You have this "I eat my nails for breakfast, suckers" kind of energy. But when I talk to you here in chat, you're actually different.

Tue 11:27 pm:

Tooth Fairy:

I'm not good at talking in person.

Tue 11:28 pm

Eric25:

Hmm? Really? You're just fine to me.

You're a little weird, yes, but... you're okay.

Tue 11:28 pm

Tooth Fairy:

You're weirder than I am.

You're the only person I've met who had the guts to post an ad on a porn hub to find a fake boyfriend who will help you ruin your own engagement.

Tue 11:29 pm

Eric suddenly stopped for a moment after reading that last message.

"Really? Did I also post my ad on a porn site?"

For a solid three seconds, he just stood there in the main lobby like a confused Wi-Fi signal. Then, after those three seconds of forced rebooting, he decided to type in his reply.

Eric25:

Wait, hold on!

Is that where you saw my ad?

Tue 11:29 pm

Tooth Fairy:

Yes. On a private gay hub on a porn site.

Tue 11:29 pm

Eric stared at his screen in horror. He definitely did not say anything out loud, but internally he was screaming like, "WHAT?! I thought that was a regular forum!"

The young man had to remind himself to inhale before his soul might completely evaporate. Then, after managing to wrangle his soul back into his body, he typed his reply and said:

Eric25:

Okay. First of all, I had NO idea that it was a porn site. But wait...

If you were on that gay porn site, does that mean...?

Tue 23:30 pm

Tooth Fairy:

I'm gay.

Tue 23:30 pm

WHAT?!

"Wait—like... for real?!" Eric blurted out internally as he stared at the message. All this time, he had assumed Allen was straight. With that face and that build, it only made sense that women would be lining up for him like he was some kind of limited-edition collectible that would sell out in five minutes.

Well, apparently...it might be the other way around.

As in, men lining up for him.

Eric still hadn't typed anything back (mostly because he was still buffering like an ancient computer with 2 GB of RAM trying to open Photoshop) when his phone buzzed again. There's a new message from Allen that popped up on his phone's screen, practically jump-scaring him back to reality.

Tooth Fairy:

Do you have any problem with me being gay?

Tue 23:33 pm

No, I don't have!

That was Eric's immediate thought. Of course not. He didn't care if Allen was gay, or if the person he was talking to was a woman, a man, or even an alien from another galaxy. But he didn't want Allen to get the wrong idea that he dislikes gays like him. So, without giving himself even one second to think of a better response, he hurriedly typed a reply like his fingers were racing against embarrassment itself.

Eric25:

I actually like you...

Tue 23:34

After Eric hit send, he instantly froze.

I actually like you?

"Wait...what?!"

That wasn't exactly what he meant to say. What he meant was something like, "I don't have a problem with you being gay. So chill, we're good."

But somehow (thanks to his current habit of panicking before thinking, which causes a lot of misunderstandings lately), it came out sounding like a love confession rather than being supportive.

That's why Eric immediately scrambled to type a reply and fix it before Allen got the wrong idea.

Eric25:

What I mean by "I like you" is that...you know?

Anyone would like you!

Because you're...likable!

Even if you're gay.

No problem at all.

Tue 23:38 pm

Still, the explanation he'd given didn't feel like enough. In fact, it probably sounded offensive.

"Oh, fuck!"

Eric's brain raced as he typed another line to justify himself, fumbling for the right words that wouldn't sound confusing. But before he could type out his reply and salvage the situation, Allen's message suddenly appeared on his screen, saying...

Tooth Fairy:

I get it. Don't bother explaining.

Tue 23:39 pm

Eric swallowed hard the moment he read the message. That's when he realized that he might have really offended Allen, and now he's angry. His anxiety spiked even more when Allen abruptly went offline, leaving him staring at the screen like a deer caught in the headlights.

Eric immediately felt like he'd completely messed up.

What he didn't know was that Allen had gone offline not because he was angry or offended, but because he couldn't stop blushing, nearly covering his mouth in response to his embarrassment. Sure, he knew Eric hadn't meant the word "like" seriously, especially since they're just pretending to be lovers. But there was a small, selfish part of him that felt secretly overjoyed...

"When was the last time anyone had actually said, "I like you" to me?" he silently asked himself.

Just then, Allen's pet cat, Husk, seemed to sense his owner's fluster. With a soft thud, he jumped onto Allen's leg and let out a gentle, questioning meow.

"What do you think, Husk?" he said to his cat while patting it. “It was...good practice for him too, right?” 

Husk's white, fluffy tail swished slowly, as if giving his owner a silent judgment. That's when Allen realized there was something about what happened earlier that made his heart skip a beat in a way he hadn't expected.

And while Allen was still trying to process his emotions, a notification suddenly rang on his phone.

But this time, it wasn’t from Eric.

It was from his former boss, Fairy Godfather.

“We need your answer now, Tooth Fairy. Will you accept the assignment?"

To be honest, Allen wasn’t in the mood to answer his boss. He had long since stopped doing that line of work and saw no reason to go back. Still, he figured that accepting the assignment might at least give him something to focus on and keep his mind occupied.

So, after a few minutes of thought considerations, he finally typed out his response.

"Okay, I'll accept the assignment."

While somewhere, miles away, Eric stared anxiously at his phone, wondering if he'd just made the biggest mistake of his life, offending his fake lover so badly that it might be hard for him to fix.