"Is this where you wanted to bring me, Leader-nim?" Lan Yu glanced around the slightly bare room, puzzled. When Luke had first led him into a high-end apartment building, he'd assumed they were headed to Luke's place; but inside there were only a few paintings scattered across the walls and little else. It didn't feel like anyone lived here.

"Yeah." After closing the door, Luke led him to the only piece of furniture in the middle of the room—an armchair—and sat down. "This is my home."

"Huh?" Knowing Luke's background, Lan Yu wasn't surprised he had a place like this—if anything, it felt a little cramped for someone like Luke. He was just thrown by how unlived-in it looked. "If I'm remembering right, Leader-nim, you live with us in the dorms."

"Mm. I don't usually stay here. You feel it too, right, Yu? It doesn't look lived in." Luke said, looking around the empty room.

"So this is your whole 'home' setup, Leader-nim?" Lan Yu tried to joke.

Luke only shrugged. "You could say that. That guy thought I should have a place to crash in Seoul and handed me this unit. MEG has money in the building anyway, so to him it's no big deal."

The way Luke said "that guy" told Lan Yu it wasn't a topic worth pressing. He switched gears. "So why bring me here, Leader-nim? It doesn't seem like you come here to eat or rest."

"Honestly," Luke turned his head toward him, "when I'm in a bad mood, I come here alone to think."

He turned so suddenly their faces were far too close, the tips of their noses almost brushing. As Luke spoke, his breath warmed Lan Yu's cheek in little gusts. Lan Yu's face flushed; he turned away on reflex. "L-Leader-nim, what... what do you think about when you're here?"

Luke didn't seem to notice what was on Lan Yu's mind or his shy little dodge. On hearing the question, he simply turned his gaze to the painting on the wall. "I come here and just look at them until my head clears."

Lan Yu followed his gaze. Hanging in the center of the living room was an oil painting in a huge gilt frame. The canvas was nothing but colored lines and indistinct breaks—countless free strokes and flecks whose intention was impossible to be sure of. Presented as a privately owned Jackson Pollock, it would arouse no suspicion.

After quietly studying the painting for quite a while, Lan Yu finally asked, "Leader-nim, are you into modern art?"

Luke, still facing Lan Yu and looking at him the way he had looked at the painting moments earlier, spaced out and didn't hear his question. Noticing his absent-mindedness, Lan Yu waved a hand in front of his eyes. "Leader-nim, what are you thinking about? You look so serious."

Luke came back to himself and smiled. "Sorry. I haven't seen anyone look at this painting as seriously as you just did, Yu."

"So Leader-nim brings people here often?" Lan Yu teased.

"No. You're the first, Yu." Luke shook his head. "I ran into it at a show right after I got back to Korea. They'd put it on an unremarkable corner. The second I saw it, I was gone—stood there for an hour, maybe more. People passed by, but almost no one stopped. On the rare occasion someone did, their eyes were really on me—curious what I was looking at. No one looked at it the way you just did. Later, when that guy asked what I needed to furnish the place, the first thing out of my mouth was that I wanted this painting. So... now it's here."

Lan Yu listened quietly and smiled when he finished. "I'm surprised, honestly—that Leader-nim turns out to be into this kind of thing."

"Why does that surprise Yu? Do I not look like someone who'd like modern art?" Luke leaned in, wearing the same innocent eyes that had already made Lan Yu surrender more than once.

"Mm—" To keep from getting swayed, Lan Yu had to pull back a little, then decided to just be honest. "It's my stereotype, I guess. I tend to think this kind of art has nothing to do with idols churned out on an assembly line. Seeing Leader-nim like it this much caught me off guard. I mean, the fact Leader-nim put it here kind of says it all."

"So, Yu—you like it too, don't you?" Luke laughed softly.

Lan Yu lifted his shoulders the way Luke had. "I guess even now I don't feel like a qualified assembly-line product."

"Is that why you're always thinking about leaving?"

Luke cut so suddenly there was no time for Lan Yu to prep a neat answer. He had to speak from the gut. "It's less that I'd leave and more that I'd be eliminated."

"Why do you see yourself that way, Yu? You're already a good idol." Luke's tone made it hard for Lan Yu to tell whether he was frustrated at wasted potential or simply couldn't understand Lan Yu's mindset—maybe a bit of both.

"Leader-nim really loves to speak in absolutes. We don't even have official activities yet. How can you say I've done well?" Lan Yu tried to keep his tone from sinking as he spoke, yet as the words left his mouth he could feel the room cool by a few degrees, and Luke's face looked a shade more sorrowful.

After a moment's silence, Luke said slowly, "Because you keep holding yourself to being a good idol, Yu. The stage just gives people a chance to see your strengths; not having one doesn't erase the parts of you that shine. Like today's recording—it doesn't mean you aren't qualified to be an idol. It just means you need more time to figure out how to show what you've trained all these years, inside a studio. If people don't receive the work, it doesn't mean the one who worked is the problem."

Lan Yu was at a loss for words. He knew Luke would comfort him, but he hadn't expected comfort that wasn't just pretty filler. It was so straightforwardly sincere he couldn't brush it off with a joke. This wasn't a scene he knew how to play. He couldn't find a stock response, so he fell into a long silence.

Faced with the quiet, Luke thought back to what Kaede had said to him earlier—"Maybe Yu isn't the person you imagine needs help"—and wondered if he'd said the wrong thing. The silence stretched. When Lan Yu still didn't speak, Luke broke it first. "Did I make you uncomfortable, Yu?"

"No." Lan Yu shook his head and sighed. "I just don't know how to respond to Leader-nim."

"I'm not asking you to respond, Yu." Luke met his eyes. "I just don't want these words to feel like a burden."

Lan Yu shook his head again. "I'm used to handling this stuff on my own. niisan has always known that about me and doesn't say much either. So when Leader-nim you care like this, I don't know what the 'right' response is. If I make Leader-nim feel hurt like last time, I'll feel like I failed Leader-nim's good intentions. And to be honest, I don't want us to drift apart again. Once was enough."

Luke's eyes lit up at that last line. "So that's how you feel, Yu!"

"What? Am I not allowed to say it?" Lan Yu laughed, thinking Luke really did love to fixate on the most random points.

"It's not that." Smiling from ear to ear, Luke reached out to hug him. "I'm just happy to hear Yu say it."

"That hardly counts as anything." Lan Yu sounded like he was complaining, but he didn't dodge. Luke held him tight. "You're a really good leader. Being on your team is something to be happy about."

"Then don't quit the group, okay, Yu?" As he said it, Luke tightened his arms around him, holding him noticeably harder.

Lan Yu could barely breathe for a second, but truthfully, he didn't dislike being held like this. "I'm not quitting, so please don't misunderstand, Leader-nim. I just mean we don't have a real stage yet. If the company decides I'm not strong enough, replacing me isn't impossible."

"No, Yu—I won't have you thinking like that." Luke loosened his hold only to frame Yu's face with both hands, their eyes meeting and holding. "Yu, you're part of collAGE. This group won't—can't—be without you. It's because you're here that this group has any meaning at all."

Being looked at like that left Lan Yu flustered, and with Luke's hands on his face he couldn't even turn away. "Leader-nim, you really love putting a crown on my head. I can't even feel those special things you're talking about in myself."

"That's why I need to keep telling you, Yu. You shove that part of you so far down you can't even see your own strengths. It's a real waste." Luke met his eyes, sincere.

"Alright, alright." Another second under that gaze and Luke would see straight through him. "Thanks, Leader-nim—you think too highly of me. I'll try my best." He could hear it as he said it: his mouth was running ahead of his brain, just spilling polite filler.

Maybe sensing the politeness, Luke answered right over him. "I'm not telling Yu to do your best. You already are. What you should do is see it—really see what's different about you. That's what's brought you this far." With that, he pulled Lan Yu into a fierce hug.

Lan Yu could barely remember the last time he'd been held this tightly—if ever. At first the heat of it startled him, left him a little at a loss. But he didn't dislike it. He knew this was something only Luke would do—an experience that existed only with him.

"포기하지마." Luke rested his head on Lan Yu's shoulder and murmured it at his ear.

He didn't know why, but even though Luke had spoken in Korean, it made him think of Kaede's "諦めたいの？" One was a question; the other, a plea.

Lan Yu slid his hands up Luke's back and hugged him in return.

"네."