Out on the table next to us was the rune I had chosen. Ezra held a wand like tool, but it harbored a small red stone at the tip like a pen. He called it an engraver. Used by witches in Archmire, the stone from Noctharis. They imbued magic into whatever it touched. Red symbolized the magic that came from Immortality. Something forever, brave. Something not quite like me. I waited as he studied what the rune looked like, twirling the engraver between his fingers absent-mindedly. 

This was natural for him. He was comfortable. He had practiced this, knew its origin. Lived in its world. Helped humans carve runes into their skin like it was normal.

I didn’t know a single person back in the Bramble who bore these runes. We didn’t need them because each one of us eventually opened that door within us. But I wasn’t like them. And I didn’t have that opportunity anymore.

My palms were slick with sweat, my leg tapping in time with the waves of nerves crashing through me. I felt like if I stood, then I would just run. So, I pulled my hair up into a bun to keep my hands busy and distract myself. Anything but focusing on the flighty feeling settling into my bones.

Am I doing the right thing?

“Deep breaths Wilder.” Ezra looked at me from the corner of his eye. 

“Sorry Ezra.” I wasn’t afraid of the pain, quite frankly there were only rare times I felt it due to the Infernals curse. My nerve endings were fried after years of continuous pain. 

I was more afraid of letting him see what lay beneath. Something I never showed unless necessary. Something that made it so I couldn’t even look in a mirror.

“We don’t have to do this. It was only suggestion.” He gave me his full attention now, concern furrowing in his brows.

“No, I want this.” I let out a nervous puff of breath. I turned around on the stool so that I faced away from him. Reaching with shaking hands to pull my shirt over my head. Slowly, carefully. Like I was undressing a wound.

The cool air of the room kissed my skin. He should see it now.

The scars. 

The map of agony they drew into my skin. Like tree rings, you could see the age, the battlefield I had become over the years as they stacked, marring my skin, making it unrecognizable. From the wrists, up and over the shoulders towards the heart. Like I had been burned, over and over again. The fresh wound from just days ago already scabbed over, adding to the absolute brutality of it all. It was my history wrapped in a painful package.

Ezra didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to look at him. I didn’t know what was worse. If he chose to say something, or if he kept looking at me like this. The silence felt like it was growing teeth.

For a long painful moment, we didn’t say anything. I waited for him to say something; tell me I was disgusting or ask what it all meant.

I braced for it.

Then I felt a hand touch my back. “You’ve lived through a lot.” His fingers traced old scars, gingerly watching the newer ones. Something about the soft tone of his voice, at how genuinely he meant it, made my stomach flip. I wanted to say something back, but what could I say? There was a lot of life that I had lived through.

Always a survivor, even if I didn’t want to be.

My hand subconsciously went to the fresh wound from last night. Already scabbing over, they healed fast. But left ugly markings behind. 

Then I felt the oldest one on my chest. Right in the middle of my sternum, the oldest one of all. The one that should have killed me. But it didn’t. And sometimes, I hated it for that. Tears sprung into my eyes, haunting memories flooding behind my eyes.

“Are you ready?” Like a beacon, his voice guided me back into the present. I looked past his hand; he was looking directly at me. “I’ll need you to sit as still as possible, so I don’t make a wrong line.” In his free hand, the wand he held began to glow, almost like it was catching fire.

I barely managed a nod, then I looked away as he started. The warmth curled into my skin like a breath. I could feel the itch as he began etching into my skin the rune I had chosen. I closed my eyes.

What if this doesn’t work? What if it doesn’t change anything?

I needed to refocus. Relax into this. If it didn’t work, at least I tried. Don’t fear failure. Simple as that. If I wanted to grow, get past the pain I felt, then I needed to try.

“It doesn’t hurt?”

I could feel a slight burn, like a match against my skin. It was warm, reminded me I was still here, despite everything. It didn’t hurt, at least not really. It felt like it was something opening.

Something gentle that my body didn’t quite know.

“No. It feels strangely comforting.”

Ezra stifled a laugh. “Quite a terrifying pain tolerance you have. I’m halfway done.” He continued to idly drag the wand across my skin with precision. I sat still, letting him trace a new truth into me.

Finally, the burn stopped all at once as he pulled the wand away. “Okay, you’re all done.” He set the wand aside. I pulled my shirt back over my head. “How do you feel?”

I stared down at my hands, nothing felt different. But was I supposed to feel different? My breath didn’t feel any different, nor the ache behind my ribs. 

Maybe I expected to feel new?

All I felt was the breath in my chest, heat clinging to my back as the rune sealed itself into my skin. I started to feel like it was familiar. Was that what he was asking? Like it hadn’t rejected me? “I don’t know. How do I know if it worked?”

“Well, it doesn’t make you feel much different, so just try channeling the energy around you and see if it lets you use the rune.”

I reached over to grab the book of which the rune was displayed. In big bold letters across the top of the page Shelter Rune. A shield mark. Protection. Not just of body, but of will. 

It had to be similar to how I used the infernal bond. I closed my eyes and concentrated on the formation of the shield. It had to be outward rather than inward like Infernal bond magic. 

Closing my eyes I swiped my hand out in front of me, really focused on what I wanted. A deep breath in. Draw it in. Shape it.

Then I opened my eyes and there shimmering in a soft blue hue, was a shield. It was faint, wavered with unease, like it was alive. It hovered, flickering like a candle trying to stay lit. 

Then it pulsed like a heartbeat, then it dissolved into the air. But for a moment, it was something all my own.

I stared in awe.

“With some practice you’ll get it in no time. Runes are powerful so use it wisely. But Wilder, you officially can make shields.”

“I really didn’t know if it was possible. But I did it Ezra.”