I have two problems:

First, my beloved grandmother, who is now in her 90s, just recently called to announce she's "terminally ill" (those were her words, not mine). She told me that I've been single for far too long, and according to her, it's time for me to "touch the grass." I didn't understand what that meant at first, but in Grandma Vale's language, it basically translates to: 'Go get a love life, you stubborn child. '

And then comes the second problem:

Grandma Vale has already chosen the "perfect person" for me, and the only person he wants me to end up with is none other than my trusted, personal assistant, Emil Weiss.

Yes! You heard it right! She wanted Emil, my very reliable and loyal personal assistant slash head butler, who has been managing the Vale household (and, honestly, my entire life) for the past twenty years.

I'm sure many who would hear this will be surprised.

Doesn't your grandma know she's trying to set you up with a guy?

Oh, she knows. She's perfectly aware Emil is a man.

And does she care?

No, not in the slightest. Absolutely not.

My grandma honestly doesn't care about the whole "gender" thing. All she cares about is someone who can "fix my life." She's totally convinced that once Emil becomes my life partner, everything will finally have direction, mainly because, you know, he's been expertly managing my bad temper for nearly two decades, something that even my ex-wife, Margarette, couldn't handle.

So when Grandma announced her grand request, my first reaction was:

"Seriously, Grandma? I love you, but I'm not gay!"

But of course, telling her that would definitely break her heart, possibly even kill her before her terminal illness gets the chance, and that is the last thing I want. So instead, here I am, sulking at my desk while she happily plots my "happily ever after" with Emil. And honestly? The more I think about it, the more it feels like karma finally cashing in, because you see, I did force my own son into an arranged marriage that nearly killed him in the process.

So apparently, the universe decided it was my turn.

So the first thing I did was text Emil, saying:

Robert V.

I need you here now, Emil. Come to me right after you drop off Eric.

And after I sent the text, I immediately grabbed a pen and paper, went into problem-solving mode, and started outlining my alternatives. I mean, I'm a businessman for Pete's sake! I've handled several challenging business crises in the past, even those hostile takeovers, you name it. Complicated problems are basically my thing.

But this?

This was the first time in my life I stared at a blank page and ended up writing absolutely nothing.

Who was I kidding? I said to myself. This is Grandma Vale we're talking about. The woman who once convinced an entire hospital staff she was the Queen simply because she wanted a soup with corn in it. I have never won a battle against her, even as a child. No, not even once.

So finally, I just sighed in defeat. I leaned back in my office chair and told myself, "You know what? Fine! Whatever! Let the universe do whatever it wants with me. If this is my karma, then so be it!"

And that's when it hit me.

I just realized, it's actually dangerous to challenge the universe because sometimes, when it really wants something, it will drag you by the ankles until you cooperate. And judging by how today was going? The universe had already rolled up its sleeves and cracked its knuckles.

So I just sat there in my office chair, waiting for Emil to show up, while mentally preparing myself for whatever chaos was coming next.

Whether I liked it or not, my fate was already in motion.

And that's how I realized, this would be the first time I'd lose a fight I never even agreed to start in the first place.