“I suppose that depends on the topic.” I say slowly, giving the response some thought. I don’t want to sound rude, but I would hate to be over eager in my answer only to regret it later. Kenji’s shoulders seem to relax almost imperceptibly, but there’s still a tense stiffness that seems to be ever present in the way he holds himself.

“I know it’s an uncomfortable topic, but we should discuss our plans for parenting.” Kenji’s voice has resumed that flat tone, and I get the feeling that he’s intentionally hiding his feelings.

“Ah,” I reply. He’s right, in fact I had honestly been putting it aside this entire time. It’s not something I’ve been thinking about with all of the preparations I’ve been making for the museum. It’s been what, a week since I received the notification for all of this? The approval for and the construction itself has been pushed up rather quickly, taking up all of my time and mind.

Kenji turns to look at me when I don’t say anything more. I’m not sure what to say, so I shrug. It’s a simple gesture but it’s the best I can do as I take a moment to continue processing the information. I shift in my seat as the silence stretches. Kenji doesn’t look at me, but I can see that he’s finishing whatever he’s been cooking.

“I want to reiterate that I will stay as long as you need me,” Kenji starts as he begins to dish out food. I suppose it is normal for the male to provide in relationships, but I still felt oddly guilty.

“That also means I could stay for as little time as you deem necessary.” Kenji continues. I look up in momentary surprise. He was offering to just go as soon as I asked? Or to stay however long I wanted him to?

“Would you stay indefinitely?” I tentatively asked, pushing to see where his boundary lies. He didn’t answer right away, which made me a little nervous. It shouldn’t, because maybe he was actually processing what he had to say, but I was still worried either way.

“I can’t promise that,” his reply gives me heart a weird and twisted feeling of hurt. Of course he couldn’t stay forever, why would I want him to anyway?

“All I can say is that I can stay for at least five years, as recognized by the council.” Kenji tells me, a hint of something I don’t recognize in his voice. Distaste? Regret maybe?

“That would be nice.” I say before I can entirely process it. Of course it would be nice, I wouldn’t like taking care of a child all on my own. However, I’m not sure what he takes ‘nice’ to mean since he gives me an odd look, though he says nothing on it.

“You’re welcome to change your mind until then, but the heart of the matter is preparation. I know it’s still early, but I would like to have at least the logistics laid out.” Kenji explains. It makes sense, it’s something both humans and dragons do. Preparing for children was a big deal, and just the thought of it made me nervous. If I had paid more attention, I might not have accepted taking on both a work assignment and this parenting assignment. The weight of it all was starting to get to me.

“I expect you’ll be busy, so I’ll see to the execution. With your assignment, it’s understandable you won’t be home often.” Kenji says softly. There even seems to be a hint of pity in his eyes, but I don’t want it.

“No, I’ll be fine.” I say quickly. “I don’t expect you to do everything for me.” I say this as he’s handing me food, which looks incredible and far better than what I would have been able to make for myself. There’s a hint of a smirk again, and this time it lingers as Kenji sits down across from me.

“Alright, well, the first thing would be to prepare a nursery.” His words don’t necessarily sink in at first, as if the reality of this situation was still taking it’s time to settle in. “Given there’s only one spare room, I could find somewhere else to stay if that makes you more comfortable.” I nod reflexively before I process what he’s proposing.

“Wait, no, I think… I think I’d feel safer having you here.” I stumble around my words almost carelessly, a direct opposite to Kenji. I feel bad for it, because he clearly puts a lot of thought and weight into his words while I’m left grasping for something coherent. Kenji shifted in his seat, quiet for a moment.

“That’s fine with me,” he started slowly. “But I don’t think sleeping on the couch would be sustainable long-term.” I scrunched my eyebrows in consternation at his words until I realized what he meant. Of course he would need somewhere to sleep, and of course he wouldn’t be so presumptions to assume that we would automatically share a bed.

I didn’t say anything for a moment as I thought about my options. I didn’t like the idea of being alone when the possibility of dragon hunters hung over my head, especially with a child in the picture. Just the thought of it sent my nerves on end, my hand clenching my fork a little too tight.

“It’s fine,” I say with a shake of my head. “Sharing my bed is better than the alternative.” I shoot a glance at Kenji, who seems contemplative. He’s looking at me like he’s not quite sure what to do with me. He said he was here to keep me safe though, so I don’t imagine he’ll complain about it.

“Right.” Kenji said with a nod of his head after a moment. “If that’s all worked out, then I’ll get started tomorrow.” I give a quiet response, not sure of what else to really say on the matter. Things were moving quickly, and I was beginning to feel swept up by it all. I couldn’t help but recall the memories from when I was Turned. Flashes of time spent alone and fearful as a new dragon with unknown strength. I had felt shackled to my Maker, left with no one to turn to and nowhere to go.

“Hey,” Kenj brought my attention back to the present, my eyes snapping back up to him. “It’s going to be okay.” He told me, reaching over and placing his larger hand over mine in a firm yet comforting gesture.

While the situation with Kenji felt all too familiar, something about the male felt different. For a moment there, I felt safe.