I’m starting to have second thoughts about this. I got to campus two hours early so I could have coffee with Cami before I went to class, and I ended up getting lost. Now I have to sit on a bench while she comes to find me like I’m a lost child. Maybe this is a sign. I’m not meant to have a full-time teaching job. I’m still young…ish. Maybe I can enroll in a nursing program. Or medical billing. I hear that’s lucrative. I’m sure Tomas would give me a job at his office.

I’m sure my parents would love that too. They won’t have to worry about me ending up living in a box in an alleyway or selling my body for rent. That’s an actual line I’ve heard from my sweet mother’s mouth. Leave it to an overdramatic Filipino woman to think their daughter will end up homeless or a prostitute because they can’t find a full-time job. Not like my overprotective brothers each have a room ready for me in their homes in case that very scenario plays out. It’s like they expect me to fail at independence.

“Dani!” Cami called as she jogged in my direction with another woman. “You really have a terrible sense of direction. I can’t believe you got lost.”

“I took one wrong turn and that just lead me somewhere completely off the mark,” I sighed as I stood up. “Even if I back track and find the café, I can’t get coffee or I’ll be late.”

“Good thing we’re here then, because we got you an upside-down, stirred caramel macchiato – no foam. Just how you like it!” Cami smiled as she held out a cup of coffee for me. “Oh, this is Layla. We’re taking another class together, but she’s in your robotics class.”

“It’ll be nice to know someone in class already,” Layla smiled.

“I know! I won’t have to awkwardly try to make friends,” I joked. I walked between Cami and Layla as we headed toward the engineering and robotics building. 

“Did I tell you I dumped Mike?” Cami asked casually.

“Mike? I thought his name was Oscar,” Layla said.

“That was last month.”

“Wait was he before or after Keith?”

“I would have dumped Keith for having a name like Keith,” I teased.

“I know, but he was good in bed,” Cami reminisced. She looked at me in the corner of her eye. “Sex is good therapy, you know?”

I shook my head and let out a soft sigh.

“Am I missing something?” Layla asked.

“No,” I said immediately.

“There is definitely something wrong if you refuse to date and or have sex for a year,” Cami argued.

“It hasn’t been a year. It’s only been nine months.”

“Same thing. You’ve been abstaining the same amount of time it takes to make a baby.”

“Maybe she’s trying to find the right guy,” Layla said to support me.

“Thank you, Layla,” I smiled.

“Of course, the singles stick together,” Cami breathed. “You both need the ‘d’ desperately. Just bite the bullet and get down and dirty. It’s not that hard to find a tall, good-looking, well-hung man.”

“How are you even supposed to know he’s well-hung just by looking at him?” I laughed.

“Bulge,” Cami and Layla said at the same time. We all looked at each other and burst out laughing.

I’ll admit, Cami has a point. It’s been a while since I’ve been with a man. Lance and I stopped having sex long before our breakup. After our split, I just didn’t have a desire to date let alone be intimate with a man. My friends and family all insisted I just needed to find the right guy, but I had thought Lance was the right guy. I wondered if maybe it was me that was the problem. Maybe I was lacking or too much to handle. If that was the case, I doubt I’d ever find a man that could put up with me.

A deep hearty laugh filled the air and across the courtyard, a tall, insanely handsome man was walking backwards as he talked to a woman. His jet-black hair was unruly, sticking in every direction but it looked like he had styled it that way. He smiled like he didn’t have a care in the world. Even from this distance, I could see his grey-blue eyes behind his black glasses standing out against his light tan skin. I could see his muscular arms under his brown sweater. If I’m telling the truth, physically, he’s just my type. Tall, handsome, toned, and a smile that just makes you swoon.

“Tell me I’m not imagining that guy,” I said barely above a whisper.

“Who?” Layla asked.

“Oh damn,” Cami gasped when she spotted the guy as well. “That’s one big boy.”

“Wow, he’s handsome,” Layla remarked. “Are you going to try to talk to him?”

“What? Why would I do that?” I asked. Sure, he’s my type, but no way a guy like him would go for a girl like me.

Our eyes met briefly and his expression changed. What was that? He looked over at his friend and mumbled something before he quickly and awkwardly turned. He stumbled as he started to basically run in the other direction. Was he running away from us? We were basically right by his friend when she called out to him.

“Wait!” she yelled.

“I’ll see you later!” he shouted back.

“But you’re going the wrong way, dummy!” She sighed as he stumbled again and changed his course. “He’s hopeless…and single.”

I turned to look at the friend that man left behind. Was she talking to me? She just grinned and waved at us before walking away. Why did he take off like that? Did we do something? He looked perfectly fine talking to his friend but freaked out when we got close. It had to be us. Did he not want to talk to us?

“That was weird right?” I asked.

“Weird, sure. Was the guy hot? Definitely,” Cami replied. “He was probably running late to his class.”

“I don’t know.”

“Were you planning on asking him out?”

“Well, no…”

“Then what’s the problem? You over think too much, Dani. You probably won’t run into him again. And if you do, just say hi. It won’t kill you to be friendly.”

“Cami’s right,” Layla agreed. “He looked like he was in a rush. I’m sure it’s nothing we did.”

“Speaking of being late, I’m in that building. I’ll see you guys after class.”

Layla and I waved goodbye to Cami before heading to our classroom. I learned she was a year older than me. She took a break to take care of her dad when he got in an accident and helped her parents financially since her dad couldn’t work. She came back to school when her dad was a little better and insisted she continue her education. It must be nice to have such supportive parents.

We could hear the whispers as we entered the classroom. Everyone – especially the women – was talking about some handsome guy in class. He walked in, found an empty desk and just put his head down. Everyone seemed too intimidated to talk or sit next to him. But why? He’s just another person. It’s not like he’s some sort of celebrity.

“Isn’t he the guy from earlier?” Layla asked as she pointed at someone with their head down. It did look like him from the back, but I really can’t tell without seeing his face. “Why don’t you go talk to him? The seat next to him is empty. Maybe you can be his desk mate!”

“What about you?” I asked.

“I’ll be fine!”

She’s right. What do I have to lose? It doesn’t look like anyone else is going to try to sit with him, so may as well, right? I could feel everyone’s eyes on me as I walked over to the man sleeping at his desk.

“Is this seat taken?” I asked.

Nothing. Hm. Maybe he didn’t hear me.

“Excuse me,” I said a little louder. “I was wondering if there was someone sitting next to you.”

Still not a word. Was he ignoring me? I was about to ask one more time when he finally uttered a single word: “Idiot.”

Did he call me an idiot?! I felt the anger in me rising. I wanted to slap this guy in his stupid, handsome face but I’ll go to jail for assault. I let out a huff and turned to look for Layla. She was just in the next row over from Jerk McJerkson.

“Oh no,” she frowned. “What happened?”

“He ignored me then called me an idiot!” I scoffed as I sat beside her.

“What? That’s terrible! I’m so sorry. Maybe we should move. I thought sitting close would be better in case you needed my help.”

“It’s fine. There aren’t many desks with two seats open.”

As soon as I put my bag down, my stuff immediately spilled out of my bag. Ugh, really? Everyone saw what happened with that guy and now they get a front row seat to my temper tantrum. I was gathering my things off the floor when the professor walked in and announced class was going to start soon. I got back to my seat, opening my book and throwing glares at the man from earlier. Who does he think he is? Does he think just because he’s hot, he can treat people like that? He’s the worst of the worst. I can’t believe I fell for it.

I was getting my notebook ready to take notes when I saw a tall, blonde man approach the sleeping man. 

“Class is about to start. Mind if I sit here?” he asked.

“Not at all,” the man replied.

WHAT?! He’s being so nice to this guy after being an asshole to me? They were chatting and laughing like they were the best of friends. But I wasn’t worthy of a glance? Ugh, I am so annoyed! I had to force myself to look away before I lost my cool.

Just ignore him, Dani. He’s not worth your time.

“Ahem.” I looked up and right into his eyes. Wow, his eyes are even more beautiful up close. And that voice. It’s deep and resonant, at the same time so damn smooth. If you’re not lost in those eyes, his voice will entrap you. “Um, is this yours?”

Snap out of it! Don’t let that gorgeously flawless face trick you! He was holding out a pink pencil bag. I must have missed it when I was getting my stuff together. I put on a straight face and snatched it from his hand.

“Thanks.”

He looked surprised but just nodded and turned around. Maybe I was too harsh. I do tend to jump to conclusions. I’ll try to talk to him and clarify things after class.

“Johnathan Park,” the professor called again.

“Oh, that’s me!” he said as he nearly jumped out of his seat. “J-johnny’s fine, sir.”

“Noted. Danielle Loughty.”

“Dani,” I corrected as I raised my hand.

I noticed the man now identified as Johnny look back at me, but when our eyes met, he quickly turned around again. He rubbed the back of his neck and I noticed the top of his ears were bright red. If he’s hot, maybe he should take that sweater off. 

I tried to pretend that he wasn’t constantly looking over his shoulder throughout class, but it’s hard to miss when he’s that big. Something about him seemed familiar. But from where? I’d remember meeting someone like him. At the end of class, I noticed he was putting his stuff away and it looked like he was taking his notes in another language. I couldn’t tell what language it was, but he seemed much more familiar with it to have taken so many notes in it.

“That wasn’t too bad,” Layla declared. “I think I can handle it.”

“Do you have another class?” I asked.

Layla nodded. “Interdisciplinary Social and Behavioral Science.”

“I do not envy you,” I teased.

“Hey Dani!” someone called. I turned to the direction of the voice. Johnny and his desk mate were looking in our direction. “I’m Jeff,” the man continued. “I wanted to introduce you to my friend…”

“I have to go!” Johnny announced anxiously as he broke free of Jeff’s grasp. Well, this feels like de ja vu. He stumbled clumsily through the classroom and toward the exit, cursing and apologizing in wake of his destruction.

What is with this guy? He seemed determined to get away from us. I thought about giving him a chance, but now he seems arrogant and weird.

“Well, that was awkward,” I sighed. “I’ll walk you to your next class, Layla.”

“Bye Layla,” Jeff grinned as he waved to my new friend.

“Oh,” she blushed as she tucked her hair behind her ear. “Bye.”

“Well, at least one of us is closer to no longer being single,” I teased.

“W-what?” she stuttered. “He was just being nice. But what about that Johnny guy? He seemed super nervous around you.”

“That’s how you saw it? It looked to me like he just wanted to get away.”

“Because he was nervous because he likes you.”

“Or because he has something against me.”

“Are you always this cynical?”

“Pretty much.”

We giggled as we walked toward Layla’s next class. I told her about my family. She asked why I was so skeptical when it came to men and I briefly told her about Lance. She seemed to understand because she dropped the subject pretty quick. Perhaps I wasn’t ready for another relationship. I know I tend to act before thinking, but I learned that thinking too much isn’t much better.

We said our goodbyes at the entrance to the lecture hall her next class was being held. As I headed down the steps of the building, someone rushing up the stairs bumped into me, almost knocking me over. 

“Whoa, sorry about that,” the young man said as he caught me by the arm.

I looked up at the tall, brunette in a white hoodie and black pants with a guitar slung across his back. He was handsome, I won’t deny that. But not as handsome as the weirdo Johnny.

“It’s ok,” I said as I regained my balance. “You should probably get to class if you’re in such a rush.”

“I’m ok. I just forgot my car keys,” he laughed. He noticeably looked me over and smiled as he held his hand out to me. “I’m Zack.”

“Dani.”  I reluctantly shook his hand. Something felt weird about him.

“It’s nice to meet you, Dani.” He started back up the stairs again but stopped a few steps from the top. “I know we just met, but you should come see the Sonic Society play sometime. It’s the school’s music club. I’m the lead vocalist and guitarist and I’d love to have you as a guest at one of our shows.”

“Oh. Maybe.”

“Cool. I hope to see you around campus, Dani.”

Zack hurried up the stairs and disappeared into the building. He seemed nice. A little forward though. As I headed down the steps, I spotted Johnny at the bottom of the stairs staring at me. He didn’t look jovial or nervous this time though. It looked like he was angry. Seriously, what’s with this guy?

“Is there a problem?” I snapped.

“No,” was all he said before turning around and walking away.

I just want to strangle this guy! He was laughing and having the time of his life earlier, then he stumbled around. Then he’s a jerk ignoring people, and back to being nice. He stumbled around again and now he’s a complete asshole! I can’t stand complicated men like him! I’m sure anyone heading into the library now must think I look insane, but one thing’s for sure: I hate Johnathan Park.