I sat on the couch, the dim light from outside lighting the room.

Skylar and Declan were debriefing at the table, talking in hushed tones over maps and relics.

Eventually, I gave up on reading and pulled out my journal. It was leather, worn in the corners, I’ve had to re-bind it multiple times. But it was mine. 

This was the reason I was sane at this point.

I opened it to a new page, it was getting full. I’d need to find a new one soon.

That’s when I heard footsteps, I looked up to see River stalking towards me. His dark eyes locked on mine, full of something I couldn’t name.

He sank down on to the couch next to me, our knees knocking into one another.

“You okay?” He whispered, a hand going to the back of my neck, fingers curling into my hair. His voice only ever went soft like this with me, it was…different.

I glared weakly at him, holding up my journal like evidence. “You interrupted journaling time.”

He huffed a small laugh, tilting my head to face him. “My dearest apologies.”

Then he kissed me.

Our silhouettes blurred as he leaned in, his nose brushing mine in a way that made my stomach tilt. Lips pressing perfectly soft in that way that made me lose my mind.

When he pulled back, I’m sure my face was twenty shades of red, face gawking like an idiot.

“You seem surprised.”

I rolled my eyes, scooting slightly away from him, dropping his gaze. “It’s still all so new.” I muttered.

And the fact that I’m not supposed to date anyone stands in the way. What would the Eternals think of this? River isn’t a Holder like the rest of us but…

No mingling of bloodlines.

I sighed deeply.

Feelings were things I wasn’t very great at.

Shooting a arrow? I never missed.

But feelings? Social cues? Relationships? 

Not my finest moments.

I’m not usually like this, boys being the only thing on my mind.

Usually my brain is more helpful. Battle strategies, preparing for patrol, mapping routes.

Usually romance was the last thing I was thinking about.

I didn’t know if I liked it.

~

The next morning I faded down the stairs in hopes of grabbing tea before the chaos started.

Chaos followed Ronan like a shadow. An annoying, impossible to get rid of shadow.

The chaos started earlier than usual.

Max sat with Ronan, gently checking his head for bumps from the concussion yesterday.

Declan was trying to scramble enough food for everyone to eat breakfast.

Skylar and River were bickering again. Something about who had the dishes shift.

I rolled my eyes and silently made my way to the tea. No one seemed to notice me. I tried to keep it that way.

I liked it like that. It was easier then getting dragged into every one of their problems. Which would be the inevitable if I chose to be nice.

So I chose to be a ghost to the people I probably trust most with my life.

I ducked under Skylar’s animated arms, sweeping around her and ignored the creaky floorboard just right of my foot.

Unfortunately, I didn’t have actual invisibility. Max asked me to come over and feel a bump on Ronan’s head.

The two were a recipe for contradicting disasters. 

Ronan - pyromaniac with no self control and too many emotions.

Max - healer boy too nice for a world like this, and Ronan.

Yet, somehow—Ronan was sitting there, clutching his dragon plush in front of Max, who had his hands buried in the dark curls and was patiently waiting as I walked over.

Ronan was so different when Declan first brought him home, like a stray dog he picked up from the street.

Except the dog had been a feral raccoon.

Declan came home with bite marks, a sprained wrist, and a very bruised stomach. He was holding a small, wiry, screaming fourteen year old hellspawn over his shoulder like it was just a normal Tuesday.

Now Max was assuring Ronan safety as my fingers felt where a bump was clearly formed on his scalp.

“Definitely a bump.” I murmured, pulling my hand away, clutching my tea tighter like Ronan would try to take it.

“I knew it.” Max shook his head, worry in his eyes. Giving me a small nod of thanks before going back to the Fire Holders mess of curls.

I didn’t expect much more. Max was a morning person. Oh how much we would all give to have that gift.

“The hit to the head explains a lot.” I sipped my tea, watching Ronan’s reaction.

He huffed out a laugh, stretching out slightly. The mask was already coming back in place. The same cocky grin and snarky comebacks lined up in his brain.

“Ha ha.” He said dryly, his words slurring still as he spoke.

I rolled my eyes, then turned to Declan.

“Is he coming on patrol?” I asked simply.

Declan turned to me and sighed. “Nope, he’s hanging out with Tessa.”

“Babysitting duty?” Ronan shrieked. “I don’t want to babysit.” 

Max shifted a bit closer to him, hand patting his head gently. “It’s okay. It’s not babysitting.”

“He needs a babysitter.” I muttered.

Max shot me a look before looking back at Ronan. “Just think of it as you two hanging out.”

Ro crossed his arms tight over his chest, slumping back against the healer with a pout on his face.

~

Patrol was a daily routine.

We always planned for it like it’d be different, because we always run into trouble. The Eternals want us to gather information before going for the big mission of overthrowing the current dictator from the throne.

Thornblade.

He had a huge army behind him that would do exactly as he ordered. No hesitation, no mercy.

And the Eternals think a bunch of teenagers can just do that…I guess?

I think somehow it worked out that Ronan wasn’t on patrolling today. We were going to break in and survey the army barracks.

Ronan had too many memories in that place.

Thanks Fate, you saved one of us from a mental breakdown today. 

We had to scale his building, up three stories then into the ventilator shaft. Once inside, I was expected to crawl through, navigating the vents to get to the back of the building where the group would be waiting for me to unlock it.

“You’re the smallest.” Skylar said matter-of-factly.

I looked at myself compared to the others. I was just a bit taller than Ronan (who was the shortest. Don’t tell him I told you), and everyone else were skyscrapers by comparison.

I sighed, but gripped the hook and rope we’d prepared and tossed it up. It latched with a small clink into place between the vent shaft opening and the metal of the building.

My stomach twisted, I was never the best with heights, not that anyone knew that.

“Just make sure to be quiet.” Declan muttered, handing me a backpack with everything I’d need.

“You’re telling Eliot to be quiet?” River huffed. 

Ronan definitely got his humor from copying River. They were so much alike it scared me sometimes.

I rolled my eyes but grabbed onto the rope, testing it gently with my weight. My leather gloves squeaking against the braid of the rope.

Then I planted my feet on the building and started the climb.

One foot in front of the other. I told myself. Don’t you dare look down.

My hands shook slightly but I kept going, making sure one foot was firmly planted before I let my weight off the other.

I was out of my element. There was no earth beneath my feet, just cold, thick metal. No plants or dirt or trees. Just wind blowing through my hair and the sun shining in my face as I swept up from the horizon.

My breathing stuttered, but I forced myself to hold my ground.

One foot. Another foot. Another foot. Another foot.

I prayed to the Eternals that the group just left to continue their part in the mission so they didn’t see me freaking out.

I wasn’t freaking out.

I was calm.

So calm.

I finally got up to two stories. How slow was I going? Is the group just standing around waiting for me?

I was high enough that I could almost see over the wall now. The wall between the last city and a forest infested with monsters. The forest that never stopped breathing.

I swallowed hard. I could see the vent above me. Just a bit further.

Hand. Foot. Hand. Foot.

I had a system.

I could do this.

I heard a gunshot. The bullet whizzed past me and sparked off the metal building inches from my palm.

Someone was watching us.

My breath caught but I forced myself to keep moving. 

My hands were sweating now, my legs shaking with each step.

Another bullet grazed the side of my face, my skin hissing in pain. Bad aim. I thought. Good to know.

I planted both feet on the building for a moment. Gripped the rope with one hand like it held my life, grabbed my handgun with the other.

Declan said not to shoot unless I had to.

But I had a clear shot. And I never miss.

I spun my body around and pointed the gun. Another shot rang out towards me, barely missing the rope.

I didn’t panic about the rope or falling to my death.

I just took the shot.

Breathe in.

Hold.

Finger on the trigger.

Pull.

It hit whoever had been hiding in the trees, they fell from their platform and onto the ground below. I smiled slightly, slipping my gun back into it’s place and going back to my climb.

Adrenaline buzzed through me by the time I finally made it to the top. I took in a quick breath of relief as I sat inside, my feet dangling of the edge as I scanned below.

Sure, I climbed three stories. But the building was also underground and from where I’d started lower into the moat, I probably climbed closer to five stories.

I took another deep breath, pulling up the rope and slipped inside the vent, notching the cover back into place before I started making my way through the most dangerous building in Ravenrock.

The vents were cool and cramped, as one thought of a ventilator shaft would be. 

I remembered what Declan had said about the vent system. How it was a complete puzzle, trying to get air in every room of this monstrous building-while also making it hard for anyone trying to break in like Jason Bourne.

I army crawled through the vents, careful to make as little noise as possible as the weak metal shifted beneath me.

Being the Earth Holder, and the vents being metal, I could will the minerals to hold my weight.

Sweat began to bead on my forehead but I kept moving. I remembered what the Eternals had told all of us. “Rest your powers. You’ll need them for greater causes down the road.” Which seemed pretty BS to me, considering they had all the power in the universe and couldn’t handle us using tiny pieces of it to keep us alive.

But, you know. I don’t make the laws of the universe. They’d be better if I did.

I sucked in a breath and paused, listening as people walking below me.

“We need to prep for the new recruits.” I heard one voice say.

Another responded. “Are they even recruits if they were brought against their will?”

“Thornblade likes to be optimistic, hoping they’ll come over themselves with time.” The first responded before they disappeared into a room that probably led to another hallway.

I exhaled quietly and kept crawling. My boots scraping against the shafts, my fingers gripping the metal connectors that held the vents into the concrete ceiling.

A few hard-to-navigate turns later and I made it to some fans built inside the vents.

I pulled out a screw driver and quietly got the two fans disarmed in minutes, setting them aside, and making it to the correct room. The security room.

“Remember, the control room is very sensitive.” I remember Declan telling me. “Just touch the buttons you need, we don’t need to alert the entire army that we’re here.”

I looked down into the room. Two guards sat inside, both straight postured and cups of coffee sat on the table.

They were watching the screens for movement, clicking buttons to rotate through the hundreds of cameras placed in probably every corner of the building. Ronan said there were only a few blind spots and they were too small for even twelve-year-old Ronan to fit in unseen.

This was going to be interesting.

I silently slipped the vent cover into the shaft across from me and slipped into the room. Both guards were faster than I expected. Within mere seconds I had two guns to my head and guards spitting and barking in my face, yelling at me with a whole bunch of questions and orders I couldn’t even process with the rage and panic over it.

I sighed. They were fast but they weren’t smart.

I used my small stature to duck under the barrels of their guns and snatched a baton from the first one’s waist belt. Hitting him in the groin and sending him toppling backward in pain. I willed the minerals in the ground to shake the concert floors as I grabbed the second ones’ gun, spun it around, and knocked him under the jaw with the butt of it.

And for good measure I knocked the first guy out too. They’d both be fine—waking up in about half an hour with headaches and sore faces.

I rolled my eyes, taking in their pathetic expressions.

Everyone should’ve known better than to underestimate me.

I turned around and scanned the cameras, hands going to the keyboard and clicking to see the other angles and rooms.

It was almost jarring to see how many cameras this man had.

The amount of money he had and was spending on protecting himself when he could be rebuilding the city—it was disgusting.

I finally spotted the door the group was waiting at. It looked like they’d knocked out the guards posted there and got their weapons.

I looked over the rows of buttons next. Lighting up panels of every color imaginable. I finally found the one that matched the color on the screen and pushed it. I heard a beep come from the screen and the group got inside.

I took a breath of relief.

I did my part.

Now they get the information on what Thornblade’s preparing for. And I didn’t trust that he would prepare for nothing.