“You curled your hair today. How sweet.” Thomas’ words brought heat up into my face. To greet me with those words as he entered the bar, with no hesitation whatsoever … Instinctively, my fingers rushed up to my curls as I looked up at him, only the counter separating him and me, and with that charming smile of his, he completely robbed me of everything all at once.

He noticed I curled my hair. Called it ... sweet. 

I'd done it for Vince, whom I had lunch with at university, but he hadn't even noticed it. Even though I thought I looked so cute today.

The situation between Vince and I was … awkward, to say the least. That last time we’d shared had told me I wasn’t in love with him anymore, but Vince had insisted on me unblocking him, and he followed me around whenever he could around campus, but only when his friends weren’t around. I didn’t like it at all, but I didn’t know how to get rid of him. 

“T-Thank you,” I stuttered up at Thomas as he sat down at the counter, and I already reached for a glass to prepare his Old Fashioned in. 

“Aren’t you hot in that turtleneck?” Thomas wondered as he slipped his suit’s jacket off his shoulders, and threw it over the back rest of the stool beside him. He loosened his tie right after, and my eyes flickered over at him as he did so more often than not, mouth filling with ridiculous, uncalled-for drool. 

“It’s cold in the classrooms, and in here, too, s-so it’s fine,” I whispered, but the reason I wore the turtleneck was the huge hickey Vince had forced on me. I’d tried covering it with makeup, but somehow, it always poked through, and it was simply too noticeable. 

And even though I’d come up with an excuse rather quickly, Thomas gazed at me with a slight chuckle and darkening eyes all the same, just before turning his head away.

His voice had deepened into a tone I wasn’t used to. 

“I suppose I have reason to be jealous,” he buzzed, and I immediately broke out into a cold sweat, blushing from head to toe as his eyes met mine in an intense confrontation. My hand rushed to my neck, hiding what already hid beneath the fabric of my turtleneck.

“I-I’m sorry—“

Now, Thomas laughed all the friendlier. “Goodness, what are you apologizing for? You have no obligations towards me.” 

I gulped. “But … b-because you’re pursuing me, and I’m …”

“My interest in you changes nothing, darling. You can do whatever you want, and if you wish for me to stop, of course, I’ll respect your decision.”

“Do you only come here to see me?” I wondered in a silent voice, and I didn’t know what came over me.

Instead of sliding his drink over across the counter, I walked over, halting right beside him to personally hand him his drink, which he accepted with an incredibly handsome smile, and all the more attending eyes. He took a little sip of his Old Fashioned, stared down at his glass, and only then did he answer me. 

“Your smile is definitely what motivates me to come by,” he admitted outright, bringing me to a blush, and before I could flee, Thomas’ arm had already wrapped around my waist, but he barely touched me, and simply kept me from leaving while asking the next question. “Do you mind it? Should I stop?”

From his seated position, he looked up at me, and I chewed on the inside of my cheek, trying my hardest to avoid his eyes, but something always drew me back into them. 

“N-No,” I stuttered. “I … I don’t mind it.” 

“You don’t, hm?” Goosebumps crawled all over me when his large fingers tugged at my turtleneck, slipping it ever so lower around my neck, revealing what I’d desperately tried to hide. “And here I thought my efforts were in vain, and you found yourself a new boyfriend to play with.” 

His fingers tickled the sensitive skin atop my hickey, and my body overheated completely. 

“I-It’s nothing like that,” I stuttered, clenching my eyes shut, but that only intensified his gentle touch around my skin. I turned completely dizzy, and I could barely handle it at all! 

“I thought I’d let you pick the pace, so you don’t get scared,” Thomas whispered. “But maybe I was wrong.” 

“I … N-No,” I gulped, and didn’t know what to say. He totally got the wrong idea! “It wasn’t … anyone new.” 

“Hm.” In a quiet sigh, Thomas slipped my turtleneck back up, hiding my skin once again, and his fingers tickled along my jaw, instead, all the way back to my ear, where he played with my earlobe for barely a second. 

“Now, that disappoints me.” 

“S-Sir—“ His chuckle made me correct myself immediately after. “Thomas. I'm so stupid, aren't I? I really, really regret it, but why is it so hard to get away? H-He came to my place, and I just didn’t know how to say no, like he's got a spell on me! But I should have, because of his poor ex-girlfriend, and because he's so horrible, but also ...” 

Was it okay to entrust myself to this man? To be so open about my thoughts? Thomas’ expression didn’t change, and he listened politely and lent me an ear as he cocked his head to the side, only intrigue to be found within his eyes. 

I blushed, nonetheless, just thinking about what I was about to say. But something about Thomas’ aura made me want to open up to him, even though I knew he saw me in a certain light, and even though he was interested in me. 

I didn’t mean to taunt him, nor was I provoking him. Honestly, I wanted some advice from a man with more experience than me, and since he was so confident about himself, I thought he was the best person to ask. To top it off, I didn’t know anyone else that could have enough experience to answer my questions. 

My voice shivered the entire time as I spoke, as if I was about to burst into tears because I was that embarrassed. 

“I didn’t enjoy it at all,” I admitted, and I wasn’t sure what came over me when I sought for support atop his shoulders, my fingers clinging to him. His arm guided me to balance by wrapping around my waist once more, and he simply held me as he listened. 

I absolutely avoided his eyes as I spoke, and stared at his loosened tie, instead. “W-With Vince, I don’t think I ever … enjoyed it. But, that’s weird, right? Because I really … liked him, but even then … it’s just so bad. Even with my exes before that, I don’t remember ever feeling good, I think. It hurts a lot, but they seem to love it a lot, so I thought I should like it too. But I don’t, at all, and I was wondering … if there’s something … wrong with me. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong.” 

Talking about these things with him was only possible because the bar was completely empty. Thomas came so late, and almost before closing, that all other customers had already left. And even then, I chewed on my shivering lower lip in embarrassment, and didn’t dare look at his face. I didn’t want to see his reaction at all.

He didn’t laugh, when I honestly thought he would. Wasn’t it ridiculous, some college kid begging him for advice to feel it more? 

Like he loved to do, he tickled me beneath my chin, and nudged it upwards, forcing me to look into his eyes. “Goodness,” he sighed, letting his thumb caress along my cheek. “There’s nothing wrong with you, darling. The fault definitely lies with the horrible men you’ve wasted your time with.” 

“I-It does?”

“That Vincent you’ve been seeing is still wet behind the ears. And on top of that, he seems quite selfish, doesn’t he? Someone like that, who only cares about himself, won’t know how to please you.” 

“I-I thought … maybe I’m expecting too much.” 

“Now, that’s impossible,” Thomas reassured me. “It’s alright to be disappointed. With the right partner, even the little things should feel great.” 

I sulked, and played with the collar of Thomas’ dressing shirt, all to avoid looking at him. “I think it showed me that I don’t like him anymore … like, at all. He said he was sorry and that he was going to be different, but he made no effort to make it enjoyable for me.” 

“I’m glad you’re finally seeing the obvious,” Thomas chuckled. “That he isn’t worth your time.”

I blushed. “I … I guess I had rose-tinted glasses on.” 

“You’re very sweet.” 

Now, I looked back up into his eyes, and I realized he had never once looked away. The whole time I had spoken in my shy, embarrassed voice, he had looked at me with a soft smile, and given me gentle advice without overstepping, and now, his gaze totally overwhelmed me. 

As if I already had alcohol in my system, my mind turned to a haze. “Do your partners … feel good with you?”

“I haven’t heard any complaints yet,” Thomas chuckled.

“So … even the little things … feel great?”

Thomas nodded, and he only watched as I lowered my lips to his Old Fashioned, never breaking our eye contact as I did so, and he helped me by tilting his glass towards me, and shared a little sip of his drink with me. The one drop that slithered down my chin, I was quick to wipe away, and his eyes had already turned darker into a shade I couldn’t decipher.

That drink, I had hoped, would give me confidence. Because my curiosity couldn’t take it any longer, and I began to wonder what exactly it was I had missed out on. I wanted to get over Vince for good.

“Can you … show me? The little, great things.” Immediately after, I regretted how ridiculous I sounded.