Yep. It was definitely a pillow. Milo frowned at it as it hit the ground.

“Get your freaky ass bird away from him!” Someone shrieked and Milo jumped back as a- oh, what the fuck was that? Ran past them.

They turned to Apolonia, trying to gauge whether or not this was supposed to be happening and the set glare in her eyes had them stepping away further.

It was not supposed to be happening.

The bird in question seemed to be an ostrich, though they couldn’t really tell? The bottom half looked a bit more like a flamingo, and the wings were more like an eagle’s? Maybe? Milo wasn’t very up to date on bird wing knowledge. They leaned forward to get a closer look, eyes finding a pattern of stitches trailing across its body, and Milo could see that the stitches were what held its wings to its body. The neck was stitched to the flamingo’s body.

The source of the shrieking, a man roughly Milo’s age, was swatting at it, throwing pillows in its direction to deter it. He was tall, similarly to Apolonia, and he wore a black tee shirt that hugged his frame nicely in a way that Milo wasn’t ashamed to admit was nice to look at.

“Get back you stupid, freaky, little bird!” He shrieked and Milo pursed their lips. They would like to take that back, actually. They were very much ashamed to admit it.

“Ro, calm down, you're not helping by antagonizing it— Hey, hey fuck you!” A man a good few inches shorter, red hair sticking out in all directions— did he fight the bird himself, geez— had stepped forward and Milo watched with wide eyes as the ostrich snatched a small chain from around his neck, ripping it off of him.

Everything that happened next happened fast.

His body contorted, hunching forward as he fell to the ground. His skin became a deep blue, orange spikes clawing there way through the skin on his arms, ripping their way past his shirt. A tail, long and just as spiky took the place of where his legs used to be, the end of the tail being made of individual spikes.

Merfolk.

Merfolk of the pterois family. Milo stared, mouth hanging open, half in horror, half in awe. His hands reached up, clutching his throat, motioning at his gills.

Well, fuck.

“Calder?” Ronan reached for him just as the ostrich pummeled him in the stomach, sending him falling backwards.

Milo rushed forward, hand flying out a gentle wave of magic pulsing towards the ostrich, freezing it in place.

They probably should have done that sooner, but fuck it.

They crouched down next to Calder, hands digging through their satchel. Their irritation rose as they realized they weren’t exactly prepared for a merfolk on a random Tuesday, off duty.

If they had their medic bag-

If their bag wasn't such a mess.

They closed their bag, grabbing Calder’s chin and lifted it up, careful to avoid any of his, what he now realized to be spines. Venom.

Milo did not feel like calling the paramedics because they were injected with the venom of a merfolk. With their luck, Tobias would show up and they could only handle so much of him, and they preferred to get paid to do so.

Fuck.

Milo’s eyes flickered back to the ostrich where the necklace that it had taken was dangling from its beak. They reached for it now that it was frozen, snatching it away and tying the string back together. Carefully, they wrap it around Calder’s neck.

Calder took a deep breath, air finally making its way through his lungs.

“Slow breaths, breathe in fully for me,” Milo instructed and Calder listened well. Slowly, he was able to sit on his own, tail disappearing and body changing to a more human form. His hair, not only red, but glowing, was slowly fading back to it's human state. His skin was still blue, dark orange patterns trailing up the sides of his arms.

“How are you feeling?” They asked. Calder gave a nod as his response and after a moment, gave him a thumbs up.

“Better, thank you.” He spoke, voice deep and laced with what Milo thought might be an Australian accent. Calder winced. "Can I please have pants?" Milo turned, snatching the closest available blanket and passed it to Calder. "Thank you." He muttered. 

“Francis!” Milo turned to meet a newcomer who was running towards the ostrich… thing.... “What happened? How did you get out?” They were far shorter than any of the others and had similar stitches to the ostrich, almost frankenstein's monster-like. Sally, even. Her hair was long, falling to her ankles, and she wore a pair of safety goggles perched at the top of her head.

“How did you not know it got out?” Ronan stumbled to his feet, clutching his ribs.

“How’s your stomach?” Milo asked and Ronan glared. His face softened immediately, wincing in pain.

“Hurts.” He confirmed. Milo sighed.

“Sit down, please.” He did, taking a seat on the couch.

“I’m sorry, I-”

“You almost killed Calder, Freya.” Freya’s eyes widened, finding Calder’s who simply stared daggers back at Ronan. Ronan shrugged and Milo had to force his shoulders down.

“Stop moving.”

“Calder, are you-”

“It’s fine, I’m not dead. At least I don’t think I am.”

Milo worked diligently. Not broken, but bruised. He’d be fine. They patted his stomach once they were done, standing. Ronan glared at them. Milo grinned.

“Right, Ro?” Ronan mumbled an agreement despite his own personal beliefs.

“Well still.” Freya sighed. “I’m very sorry Francis got out and caused trouble.” She fell quiet. “Who is this?” Milo turned away from Ronan’s injuries and faced her.

“The only reason Calder is living and breathing right now, clearly.”

“Ro, I swear to god-” Calder snapped. “The bird did not almost kill me, now stop being an ass for 5 full minutes, will you?" 

The bird most definitely almost killed him, that Milo could agree on. Ronan huffed, flipping him off.

Heaven, help them.

Somehow, the room broke into laughter, Milo included. Because why the fuck not at this point? Right now, they were pretty sure they were delusional, and all they wanted was their bed. 

“As you can see-” Apolonia interrupted and everyone fell quiet. Calder straightened, Ronan fell back against the couch, and Freya rocked on their heels, hands clasped in front of the others. Apolonia looked between them. “We all get along nicely.”

They fell back into a fit of giggles.