(Matt's POV)

She’s perfect.

Everything about Madison makes me drawn to her. I watch as she looks through the books in an aisle. I couldn’t even care enough to know the genre she’s looking through. I just want to focus on her.

To be sure she’s okay at least. That’s why I’m watching her, to make sure she’s safe. That’s why he wants me on this mission, for intel and to guard her.

I could just-

“You know that he would kill you for stepping out of line like that.”

…

Maybe he wouldn’t? I messed up before.

“And you remember what happened then. You were locked up for about a week. No food, barely any water, and nothing but stone around you. Do you really want to go back there?”

Of course not!

I just…

One more month.

“And what? You're waiting for what?”

No, you're right.

I don’t understand what's wrong with me lately.

Straighten it up, then.

“I just don’t want to see you get hurt again. I hate how he treats you. It’s not okay, Matty.”

I’m not usually this sloppy, and I’m not usually this, Stupid either. I know better than to let someone get into my head like this. I can’t explain it, but something about this assignment… about her, has me slipping when I know better than that.

“Maybe you should ask for another assignment.”

NO!

I might not be at my best right now, but I still know better than to ask for that. If he thinks I can’t handle this, then he’s likely not to trust me with anything, and then, what do I do? What would I be worth to him then? Nothing. I wouldn't even be worth keeping around at that point.

I’m not risking it.

“You mean like you are now?”

I realize the point she’s getting at and know that I need to shut it off again before things slip too far.

Okay, you’re right.

Madison starts to slip down another aisle, and I do the same across from her, being sure to limit how often I look her way which I can do now with a distance that I’m supposed to.