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MIRAGIA

The Self I Once Was [2]

The Self I Once Was [2]

Apr 11, 2026

“Ugh… my head…” I groaned, clutching it tightly. “Damn it… what did I just hit…?”

By reflex, I glanced forward… then fell silent.

Right, I forgot. I can’t see anything here. Haaah… why do I never learn from my own mistakes?

Annoyed? Of course I was. And since I couldn’t tell what I had just collided with, I could only guess.

Did I… hit the boundary of this place? Or… something? Or… wait, could it be that I ran into someone?!

I don’t know, maybe I’ll never know—and I don’t want to know.

I tried to stand up. But before I could fully straighten myself. I swear on my life, I heard footsteps. Soft and faint, yet unmistakably clear in my ears. My body instantly tensed. My eyes widened to their limits. My face went rigid from the shock.

…Footsteps…? But… but how is that possible?! Weren’t all my senses supposed to be completely shut off in here?!

Curious, I slowly straightened from my lowered stance and fixed my gaze toward the direction the sound had come from. Not long after, that footsteps came again…

And again…
Once more…
And once again…

Until, at last, it stopped right in front of me.

I could feel the presence of something before me, but I didn’t know what form it took, the darkness completely blocked my sight. I could only remain still, unwilling to make a single reckless move. Slowly, I stepped back, one step at a time, clinging to what little calm I had left as my chest tightened with fear. But just as I was about to turn—

My back… touched something.

It wasn’t a wall.
Nor was it an inanimate object.

At once, a chill crawled from the nape of my neck down my spine, like unseen fingers tracing along my skin. My breath caught. My body trembled beyond my control.

I wanted to scream. I wanted to run. But my legs felt heavy, as though the ground itself held me in place. Trapped between two presences I couldn’t comprehend—one before me, one behind me, keeping me from escaping. At that moment, I knew one thing for certain:

I… was not alone.

Damn it! Why does it always have to be like this!

And it didn’t even stop there—my misfortune only continued.

Suddenly, my body refused to move. Not because of fear, or the storm of negative emotions within me. No… it was something else. It was more like some mysterious force had locked every movement I had. I couldn’t even move my head. The only parts of my body that could still move freely... were my mouth and my eyes.

I thought my misfortune would end there. But, it turned out… I was wrong.

A moment later, I felt something sharp touch my forehead, right at the center. That unknown sharp object began to press slowly into my skin, piercing through and entering my head. The sensation was freezing—unnaturally so—like a shard of ice being driven into my skull. The cold spread inward, seeping deeper and deeper.

Strangely, there was no pain at all. Even though I was certain that object was now inside my head—perhaps already touching my brain.

And yet?

All I felt was cold.

After reaching a certain point, the mysterious object suddenly stopped. For a brief moment, I thought it was over, that the entity would pull it out and leave me in peace.

But once again… I was wrong.

Without warning, the object began to move again. But it wasn’t being pushed in or pulled out. It... was turning.

*CLICK!*

A sharp, metallic sound rang out—like a key unlocking a sealed door—and echoed clearly in my ears.

The instant it was pulled free, my body jolted violently. My eyes snapped open, my breath broke into ragged gasps, and my heart slammed wildly against my chest.

I immediately shouted, “W-what are you doing to me?! Damn it—let me go…! I said let me go, you bastard!!”

I screamed in desperation, struggling with everything I had to escape whatever was holding me. But my body wouldn’t budge. It remained completely still, rigid like a statue. I assumed this had to be the doing of the entity behind me.

"What do you want from me, huh?! Do you enjoy this?! Tormenting people like this!?"

But they remained silent. No answer, nor reaction, as if my existence meant nothing at all.

In that situation, with no way out, a possibility suddenly crossed my mind—one that might very well be true.

‘W-wait... don’t tell me… it’s you?! The ones who dragged me into this damn place!" I continued. "Damn it! What did I ever do to you?! Why are you doing this to me?!"

I forced my body to move, veins straining, pushing myself to the limit. I struggled with everything I had, trying to break free.

"Hey, answer me...! Don’t just stay silent…!!! I said answer my—"

Without any clear cause, my voice suddenly cut off, vanishing from my mouth. My consciousness began to slip away. My head spun violently, and the strength drained from my body as if it had been pulled out by force.

I was truly like someone on the verge of death. Unable to move. Unable to speak. Even my breathing slowed, growing weaker with each passing second, as though my body no longer had the strength to draw in air.

It could be said that I was now standing at the very boundary between life and death.

But suddenly, that cold sensation seeped back into my skull. And in the next instant, it twisted into an overwhelming, unbearable pain. It struck my head without mercy.

“Aaaaaaahhhh!!!”

I screamed at the top of my lungs as agony exploded inside my head. The voice I had lost moments ago now tore through the void, echoing without end. My limp body began to tense. The veins across my body bulged once more, as though they might burst at any second. My eyes flew wide open, as if they might pop out of their sockets.

My head felt as though it was being battered repeatedly by a blunt object. My body, which had been rigid until now, finally collapsed to the ground, writhing uncontrollably in agony, like a fish deprived of water.

The pain was utterly beyond reason, I could say it felt exactly the same as what I experienced in the room above.

And, it didn’t stop there. The pain in my head began to spread throughout my entire body without exception.

My consciousness began to fade again. Blood started seeping from my eyes, ears, nose, mouth—even from my fingernails and toenails. My condition… was far too bleak to be described with mere words.

Everything felt shattered, as though my mind and entire body were being torn apart, then pieced back together in the most brutal way possible. Even so, I continued to endure it with everything I had.

“This… hurts…!”
“It hurts! It hurts! It hurts! It hurts—!!”
“It… it fucking hurts…!!!”

After what felt like an eternity of unbearable suffering, my body went limp. I lost consciousness. And then, darkness took me.

Even within that fading consciousness, I felt... grateful. Relief. Because, at last, now I was free from that suffering.

Yes... even if only for a moment, it was a blessing beyond measure for me.

…

IFOman
IFOman

Creator

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MIRAGIA
MIRAGIA

129 views3 subscribers

Who am I, really?

Before all of this, I was just an ordinary man, with no remarkable talent and having only simple ambitions, living a peaceful life with Grandma, the only family I had.
Or at least, that’s what I had always believed.

Until fate… drew back the curtain of the stage for me.

I fell into a world that defies logic, where madness and absurdity walk side by side. The burden of suffering that was never mine was forced upon my shoulders, along with responsibilities I never chose. And yet, I chose to accept it, for the sake of obtaining one definitive answer: who am I, truly?

Together with three mysterious figures who call themselves my followers, I walk a world filled with distortions and hidden truths. Amid uncertainty and lurking danger, we must disguise ourselves, protect our identities, and face the reality that this journey is far deeper and far crueler than we ever imagined.
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11 episodes

The Self I Once Was [2]

The Self I Once Was [2]

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