Chapter 43

It was difficult for Odin to stay awake to keep watch as the brutal sun crept behind the smokey haze that marred the summer sky. Even the insects incessantly buzzing the day before had stopped. He suspected their absence was due to Sprinkles having eaten them all but he wasn't about to ask. Odin was too worn out from his fights earlier in the day to bother solving that mystery. Walking in circles around the vehicles had gotten boring quickly. Going to the Armory to eat something would give him an excuse to move with purpose but also require him to leave his post. He settled down on top of one of the cars then opted to stretch each time he began to doze off. After an hour on top of one he hopped to the next, then the next, until finally he took up a position on the cool gravel beneath the little red pickup nearest the road. Birds flitted around the trees but none were foolish enough to come near him.

You awake? Freyja asked, startling him from sleep.

Yes!

Hemi said she wanted to talk to you about something, she said.

It's possible she has not overpowered her Host and has questions regarding managing such an arrangement, Odin explained.

A crunching noise at the other end of the truck made him jump, then crab walk four feet out from under the vehicle, ready for a fight. He arched his back, fur standing on end until he got a good view of Freyja with a plastic cat food cup in one hand and a bottle of water under her armpit. Her amused smirk stung like an insult.

"Do not sneak up on me. I could have killed you," Odin cautioned.

Freyja rolled her eyes and came around the truck to set the small orange bowl on the gravel. The light of the setting sun stretched under the truck more than Odin thought it should.

"I did not fall asleep," he said as he approached her.

"Ha, sure," she replied with a laugh before sitting on the gravel with her back to the driver's side door. "Eat. When you're done I'll put some water in there. Sorry I don't have another bowl. Kira-217 didn't bring your's from the yard when she stole the Armory."

He snorted.

He wasn't going to admit he was hungry. Granted, consuming a target to boost one's shapeshifting ability wasn't the same as properly feeding one's Host, it still served to fuel the Host body. Freyja had devoured Sherlock who had devoured Page. She likely wasn't feeling very hungry either.

He chirped with satisfaction while he ate gravy covered fish flakes from the little bowl. It was more satisfying than the hard food and more substantial than the liquid soup, though not as filling as the bearded Butcher Boy and his companions had been. He only stopped chewing when Freyja absentmindedly began gently rubbing his head behind his scarred ears.

"Brrp?"

"Oh, sorry," she said, withdrawing her hand.

Odin swallowed his food. "I do not mind you petting me. I greatly enjoy lovin's."

She scratched his head again then folded one of her legs toward her chest, holding it in place with both hands. The water bottle dangled loosely from its cap pinched between two of her fingers. Birds flitted into the trees, preparing to roost for the night. Odin returned to eating his food, delighted to discover a shrimp. The texture was different than the fish chunks. He hoped to find more of the small creatures in the cup.

"Thank you for trying to protect Gee and Zoe," Freyja said while watching something in the distance on the road.

His mouth full, Odin chose to respond via a private Link, They are your family. I could not let them die. I am sorry I was inadequate and Gee was harmed. I understand if you are angry with me for devouring living Humans when I agreed not to.

She took in a breathe.

Odin braced himself for her disappointment.

I'm not angry with you, she replied calmly.

He stopped eating again and turned to look up at her. She certainly didn't look angry. No such emotion came from her in the slightest. It was unnerving how at peace she was.

I understand why you did it and I have no sympathy for the Butcher Boys, Freyja continued. If I was in your position I would have done the same thing. Maybe worse.

Worse?

She hung her head. I ate Sherlock. He ate Page because they'd slipped into madness. I was able to pull them out of it but wasn't fast enough to stop Sherlock from...they're both dead and it's my fault. Now, I have to live with that and accept that they're part of me. Hemi said there's no precedent for a Spark eating a member of the Hive, much less a Hive member who's previously eaten their Spark.

Odin sat on his haunches and trilled in acknowledgment. If Hemi didn't know of a similar instance in the past then it was unlikely it had happened. Unless, it was something that had been covered up in some way, which felt unlikely in this particular case. He searched his memories for something he could say to make her feel better.

There's a legend, he began.

Freyja glanced down at him with only her eyes but stayed silent.

Long ago the gods saw fit to allow the life of a Hive member to continue after their Host and body were gone. Tether had served the Hive with all they had to give, sacrificing their life and the life of their Host, to protect the Hive. As their reward they remained a part of the Link, Odin said.

Not the same as eating someone, Freyja pointed out.

No. But they were a part of that which binds us together. I have never found any evidence of a Link Ghost in reality. But it is part of our Teachings, that even though we may die, we may live on, Odin explained.

Freyja huffed out a laugh then rolled her eyes again. Great. Worms have an afterlife too. I think you misunderstand what's bothering me, Odin.

He chirped. What is bothering you, then?

Freyja uncapped the water bottle and took a swig before looking down at it silently. She sat there a moment longer, finally screwing the cap back on top with a sigh.

It didn't feel wrong.

Odin tilted his head and took a step toward her. What?

I killed Sherlock and ate him for killing Page. It didn't feel wrong when I did it and I don't regret doing it. It's my fault they're both dead but I know I'd do it again if something similar happened. If the Butcher Boys were here right now trying to hurt Gee and Zoe, I'd tear them apart. I'd consume them. I'd do everything you did and then some. The thing that's bothering me is I know I should be upset at the idea of killing but I'm not, Freyja said. I would have smothered the Old Man myself if given the chance, but I thought that was different. I thought it was just because I hated him for everything he put us through and everything he stood for. Now, I'm not so sure.

Odin took another few steps forward and rubbed his neck against the shin of her folded leg. He purred loudly out of reflex.

It is my fault you are in this situation, Odin said.

It's your fault I'm alive, Freyja replied. Kira-217 would have killed me otherwise. I wasn't part of her plan.

You know her plan?

Only what she told Page, she replied. I've been looking over their memories from when I pulled them out of the madness loop and...Kira-217 isn't well. Page went along with the plan to survive. Them dying put Kira-217 over the edge. I don't know when or if she's coming back but we can't stay here. Shit.

"Shit?" Odin asked out loud.

Freyja poured some water into the little food bowl with the remaining fishy chunks then got to her feet. "Someone's coming. Finish eating and act like a cat."