It’s not like I can go back to sleep like this. The sun is going to be up in about an hour, so what’s the point? I’m too tired to be scared but I’m too scared to fall back asleep. I’ll just… get a glass of water. Yeah. My lips are so chapped from the dry, still air of Josh’s house. 

I swept my legs from under the blanket Dem was sharing with me, trying really hard not to wake her up from her light sleep.

“Hey! Where are you going??” She protested as she sat up to chase after me.

“Calm down. I’m just getting some water.”

“Do you not care about—“

“NO, I DONT! I dont fucking care.” I burst out in the quiet room. The words fell from my mouth before I could stop and think. We both stare at each other, then to the clock. 5:56 AM

The sun will rise soon.

I sigh off the fluster of the moment. “I’m sorry, I just don’t know… what to do. Whel-I mean-I do. Just… how!? Where do we even start?!” I look down at the hardwood-floor under my feet.

Dem looks at me pitifully. “You know we can help, right?” 

I look up at her with a sheepish gaze.

“It’s almost morning. Let’s get that cup of water, ok?” 

She always knows what to do. It’s so easy to lean on her for support when you’re about to fall into the pit.

I just wish I could do the same for her…

We both make ourselves lemongrass mint tea while the sun rises to greet us. This morning was cold, and frosty. The grass, covered in a glittery dust of ice, tells us ‘winter is coming’ fast and hard. 

Sitting on the couch, we talk a bit more about the fishy drama between Desmond and Fiona.

“Hey, so you know how I was talking about fish and cantalope’s cheating thing?” Dem started.

“Yeah...”

“Apparently it was just a rumor. They’re in a happy relationship. Well… as happy as them two can be, insecure and devious little-.” Dem scoffed, and I let out a snort, that led to uncontrolled laughter between the two of us.

We both look at the clock.

6:02 AM

“Ya feelin’ any better?” Demy asked.

I stare at the tea I have cupped in my hands. “Yeah. I guess I’ve gotta do something about it.” I sigh a slow, deep breath, enough to freeze my warm mint tea.

I’ve gotta finally commit…