last night I ate the kachori that Pranit bhaiya got for me. I talked to him with the project that I want to work on. I’m in my last year of my masters of biotech. after lockdown there is more scope for it. I was thinking what type of job I should go for. so that way it'll be easy to stay away from home or to stay away from my guardian. as I was thinking, i got call from my father. and I sighed. I didn't want to deal with him, cause my whole day would be ruined. 

I picked up the call, “hmm " I said

"I’ve been calling for 5 min, why didn't you pick it up. " My father said

"I was out of my room papa; I just got in. what happened? called me early in the morning." 

"Well, there's a birthday of your cousin after he just got married like month back so there's big gathering. all of your cousins and uncles would be here. you weren't here for his marriage. so, you should be here for his birthday. " My father said

papa, he interrupted and spoke

"don't give me an excuse saying you'll miss the lectures and all. it just been month since the collage started. so, you’re coming. or else I won't sending you this month's allowance. " My father said

I sighed...... and stayed quite for a while. ok, I’ll come. but I’ll just be there for a one day. and then I’ll be back. I won't be staying. 

"Sure, just be there on time. and when you'll be here just behave. and don't talk back to anyone,” said my father

"Seriously, your telling me to behave. that's coming rich from you."

"ishhu, have you lost your mind or something? you've learned to talk back since you left the home. who are you hanging out with? you think over smart since you've living away from house. let me tell you something. you’re living on my money. what do you think you are. you'll be 22, still in collage. when i was your age i already had a job and was making sure my father could sit back and enjoy the retirement. unlike you. living in Pune. living on my money. yet dare to talk back to me. now apologise,” said my father

I stayed quiet. and that made him loose it

"isshu didn't you heard what I said." said my father

I was quite

"ayee, what wrong with you. he screamed. don't you understand. what i asked. apologise." said my father

"sorry" 

"Sorry for what?" said my father. 

"Sorry for talking back."

"hmm, that's better. god, can't even have a normal conversation without making a scene. i guess you get that from your mother. " And then he disconnected the call

I just sat there trying not to get affected by his tone. his anger. and then I got text from my bff, karan. 

i saw the text and was in not in mood to text back.

I couldn’t help but feel down about how he ruined my morning and then blamed it on me. I went to my department. there was just practical on today's schedule. sayali wasn't there in department today. and kavya was talking on call with her bf. i went to canteen and ate a sandwich. as i was thinking what to do, Karan also walks in canteen. and I sighed. i knew he'll make a scene. so i tried to act like i didn't saw him and tried to get out of the back door of the canteen. but it was too late. he saw me and called out my name.

hey, isshu. wait na

i stopped in my track and looked back at him. heyy. i just ate so i was going to go out for a walk.

"Let me join you then. " He said

you sure, you just walked in canteen. you don't want to eat anything?

"naah, i was here for tea. but the canteen's kaka (uncle) said, I’ve to wait for tea. so I’ll just walk with you for a bit. 

i nodded. and we walked out of the canteen. 

"so you didn't pick up my call. woke up late?" said karan

"naah, i was not in mood to talk"

"When are you in good mood? there's always something with you" said karan

"what's wrong with you karan? why you being so mean over call?"

" cause i can't spend good time with you ishhu. there's always something isuue with you and your father. i don't understand. if he threatens with you allowance. just get a part time job or something." said karan

" oh, really so i should just let my father spend his money to his side chick. he'll spend every saved-up rupee by my mother on her. "

" why does it matter? your mother isn't here why your attached with her saving? " Said karan

i looked at him with surprised eyes. " what's wrong with you karan? "

" what's wrong with me? what's wrong with you? you're putting up with your father just for money. just ask him for some money and move out" said karan

"You think it's that easy? that man is control freak. like he would give me money that easily. i had to send him bills of every single rupee that i spend. and then he'll scream at me for the tea that i had in cafe or chips that i bought. but he'll spend the money on that bitch like he has unlimited money. so i can't just walk away from him. he'll spend everything on her. he'll sell the house. my mother's house."

"ishuu please, it's not like your mother contributed in that house" said karan

i glared at him. and walked away from him.

he screamed from behind, think about it. it'll be better for you. 

I went back to my hostel room. changed into my uniform to more comfortable clothes. and sat down on bed. and was thinking I wish I had died that day with my mother. at least I would've been free from this hell.