“So… not to kill the moment, but how did you girls know I was here?” Mari showed me her phone “M: Mari, Richard is in trouble, I think he say something about drinking, there’s a bar nearby, HURRY!”  even with all of this he called my friends to not let me spiral into madness, Lisa rolled her eyes “look, I know I was the last one to find out, and I probably will take a while to get use to the idea, so just answer this” she licked her lips “does he truly makes you happy?” he is a pain in the butt, he often makes me mad, and Michel sometimes can be such an idiot, but he is also kind, makes me laugh and cares for me, sure his gestures of support and affection can be nonconventional but, like he said I do love dumb looking creatures “he does… so what do I do now?” they all looked at each other “you sober up?” Elise asked, I´m still a little tipsy, but I think I have eighty-five percent of my motor capabilities and thought process, I nodded. Mari smiled, “Then I think you should tell him everything you just told us.” Bianca winked and placed her hand on my shoulder. “Come on, use those samurai legs of yours and go get your man!” Lisa smiled, though not thrilled, “You have no time to waste, we´ll be around if you need us, go!” I smiled, “Did I mention I love all of you?” They all laughed. “Not as often as you should,” Elise told me as they walked away. I hit my cheeks and started to sprint back to Michelle's apartment. I almost fell maybe twice, but after a moment, I got used to the motion and picked up speed.

When his building came into view, I managed to see Michel walking out of the front door. I sprinted harder and managed to catch up to him. “Richard, what the hell… you smell like a pub” I panted and gasped for air “Shut up and listen” I order him his mouth turned into a line as I ordered the ideas in my head “I want this” I told him, he took a step backward “want what?” he asked with confusion in his voice I walked closer “this all of this, I want to be right next to you, I want to see you every day, I want us to do stupid things and just laugh about it” he shook his head “Rich, what if I don’t make it?” I held his trembling hands on mine. “You will, I´m sure of it,” he bites on his lip, “how can you be sure?” “you are stubborn, and strong, and you are welling to face the fear of a lot of thing, you faced the fear of trying to fix this, you could very well just walk by me in the subway, but instead you armed yourself with courage and valor and faced your past, if you could do that I think you can make it” he started to sob “do… do you really want this? Even if we could crash and burn even before it starts? Even when the one thing I always give you is harm and pain?” I hugged him as tight as I could “I love every part of you, the good ones, the bad ones even the painful ones, I´ll hold you even if you think you are made of broken and bridle glass, I don’t mind a few cuts” his fear, insecurities and the pain he had hold in for long months came crushing down he wailing and cry while holding me with shaking hands.

“I don’t want to die, Richi. I´m scared, and I want to stay by your side. I want to walk in the park with you again, I want to pick you up after work, I want a life with you, and I want to hold you as we grow older. Would you really stay with me? Even if I can’t promise we can have all that?” he showed me, and reminded me that I am still capable of this much care and affection, I want to spend our time together, I want the same things he want, forever and always “It´s funny” I told him “before this would have been unthinkable to me, but now I know, that the pain and suffering don’t have to be the one think I can hold onto” he took some air and pull away from me, he looked in his pocket and pull a box from it “I´m sorry, for everything I did, take this” I opened it and found my glasses the same model I broke under his words, I took them with shaky hands and put them on, “how do I look?” I asked him while smiling like I use to do back then “beautiful” he said and kissed me, I don’t know what the future holds for us but, maybe, just maybe, things will work out, I will do my best for that, no more hate, no more disdain, just the one feeling that was at the root of everything, love, the love that never truly died, it kindled the negativity but always longed for this, right here, this instant were everything works and I’m grateful for that, for this two months.