I managed to finish some of the hotpot with a bit of guidance, although I mostly did so by burying the meat between piles of rice. It’s a shame I wasn’t able to taste much since it appears to be a rather layered recipe. Zhulong claims they can make a version that isn’t as spicy, but I’m not sure my fragile heart is ready to trust again.

We exit the restaurant when the door behind us swings open again. Sabrina stops us from leaving just as we’re headed down the street.

“Sorry, I almost forgot!” She hands me a plastic bag, and I only realize what it is when I feel how heavy it is. “It was all that we had, unfortunately. I would have picked up more than two packs if I could…”

“No, this is more than enough. Thank you again. You spoil me rotten every time I come here.”

“Not at all! I’ll tell mom you were here. Come back soon to have some of her home-made lemon cheesecake, okay?”

“It’s a promise, then,” I snap my fingers with a quick ‘ah’ and point towards the kitchen window. “-do you know the girl that’s working the late shift? Blonde hair, short and thin, wore a white turtle-neck with gloves,” It comes back to me finally as I’m stalling to remember. “-her name is Clarice.”

“Oh, yeah. I heard she recently moved here and was looking for a job, but no one was hiring during the night. So, I told her she can work here if she’s okay with the pay.” A new tenant? I can’t ask from where, but I have a hunch. “Why? Did she bother you?”

“No, just curious. She didn’t have a uniform, so I didn’t think of her as a waitress at first.”

“She doesn’t like wearing uniforms, and we’re not going to force her. Is it too confusing…?”

“No, not at all. Her nametag is enough to let me know she works here. That’s all I wanted to ask. She’s a good hire.” Sabrina smiles and pulls at my sleeve to whisper in my ear again. This time, it’s even more outrageous than last time.

“Ill give you her number if you give me his.” 

We are both too old for you. What do they teach kids in school? Predator awareness month should be mandatory or part of the curriculum. She could learn a thing or two from Clarice. I nudge her aside and give her a stern look. One similar to what a parent would give their rebellious teen. 

“I’ll tell your mother what you just told me if you ask that question again.”

She turns beet-red and awkwardly excuses herself, but not before giving Zhulong a warm ‘come again’ to spite me. She quickly waves me goodbye and rushes back inside– guilty as sin. She must be doing fine if she’s got enough energy to be hitting on random men at her age. If all deterrents fail, I pull out the old mom-card to get her to straighten up. Her mom is a kind woman, but she doesn’t tolerate tomfoolery. The old lady is working hard to get Sabrina to further her education, and I’m not planning on ruining it.

I’ve been a little worried for her, so I’m glad she’s doing well and looks to be hanging out with other girls her age. I know I told her to get books for the money, but I don’t doubt she’s going to set it aside for their bills instead…

But if I bought her a book that’s useless to her studies, I’d just be burdening her. All I can do is throw money at the problem and hope it eases her tension just a little. I’ll also keep an eye on the people that associate with them, just as a precaution. It’s best to keep an eye out on everyone and memorize their schedules. Then, if something happens, I can narrow down my list of suspects. God knows the police aren’t good for anything in this neighbourhood.

“Sweet girl,” I almost forget I’m with company. “-what did she give you?”

“Not me.” I extend my arm and hold the bag out for him. “It’s for you.” he raises a brow and takes the recyclable bag in hand to inspect the contents. It doesn’t look like he can wait to sate his curiosity.

“Oat milk?”

“I figured you don’t go shopping in regular stores, so take a bit of it with you today.”

He scans me up and down as if he’s piecing together what transpired in the past five minutes.

“I’ve-” he starts, but immediately stops himself. He’s looking to the side as if he’s said something wrong again. “-nevermind. Thank you.”

“.............” Did he just thank me?

“But… will this not expire if it gets lukewarm? My residence is about an hour away…”

“You don’t have to store it cool. You can keep it at room temperature as long as it isn’t open.”

“Really?”

“Yup. The expiration date is also longer than dairy products. So, don’t worry so much and just enjoy it.”

“...Thank you.” Did I die the moment I put that broth in my mouth? And am I supposed to believe I died and went to heaven instead of hell? I must still be asleep in my office. Why else would I get to hear the guy who despises me give me thanks?

“Wow. Two exclamations of gratitude in a row. What did I do to deserve this honor?”

“They were for completely different things,” he frowns and pinches the bridge of his nose. “-if this is so funny to you, why don’t you just point and laugh?”

“My bad.” If I have to be honest, he looks like he’s actually ashamed of what he said. Of all the stupid things to be embarrassed about, why this? I point at him and curve my index finger inward to coax him into getting closer. “Come down here for a sec.” He curls a brow but eventually leans down a little to meet me at eye-level, and that’s when I take the opportunity to pat him on the head.

Can’t keep scolding the pomeranian if he learns not to bite. Some positive reinforcement may calm him down. And honestly, being ashamed of something benign like oat milk isn’t the biggest sin he’s committed, but he sure acts like I’ll look at him sideways for it. I can’t make fun of him when he doesn't laugh at me for making even dumber mistakes. Like the fact I used a spoon instead of chopsticks to eat the rice.

“It’s the first time you’ve offered me your thanks. I was just surprised.”

“...I see.” We didn’t get much done in the end, but at least we had a somewhat normal conversation by the end of the night.

“I’ll walk you to your car. Where did you park?” I start walking and check my watch. Public transport is down at this hour in our neighbourhood. Even if he wanted to take the train or the bus, he can’t do so tonight, and I doubt he’ll be willing to stay in a motel. Do rich kids like him even know what a motel is? Or do they just think it’s a misspelled version of ‘hotel’? 

“...You’re on good terms with the owner of that restaurant." I only manage to take a breath before something interrupts our conversation.

“Mister Karma!” I halt and turn back to peek around the corner. As suspected, the call was coming from outside my agency. 

“Oliver?” It’s one of the seamstress’ young children. Did something happen? What is he doing outside at this hour and why is he awake? Nevermind, I can’t just leave him in the dark. “Uh, I’m sorry, but can we make a quick detour? I have to let someone in.” Zhulong follows my line of sight and nods quietly. 

When we approach the six-year-old, Zhulong keeps himself a safe distance away to appear inconspicuous. I wonder if it’s out of respect or concern for the child. Since he looks like an outsider, he could be seen as a dangerous person. It’s comfortingly considerate of him if true, given our past interactions.

I kneel down and look up at the kid that’s sitting on the stairs leading up to my shop. His eyes are red, and he’s only wearing a thin t-shirt and shorts when it’s so cold outside.

“Did you get locked out again?”

“I’m sorry…”

I sigh and raise my arms to hold them out wide.

“Come on. I’ll tuck you in.” he seems willing, but his eyes are locked on the man behind me. When I look over my shoulder, I catch Zhulong turning his gaze away. He looks uncomfortable.

“He’s with me.”

“Oh. So, not a bad guy?” Well, that’s up to interpretation, but… I’ll spare the six year old the details.

“My arms are getting tired. If you don’t grab onto me right now, I’ll make you walk up aaaaall these stairs~!” I love how easy it is to please kids. Unlike adults, who are irrationally complex and never speak with their heart, kids are too absentminded to run what they think through a filter. I look back at Zhulong to give him the ‘follow me’ look, but he’s got an eyebrow raised at me like I’m doing something I shouldn’t.

What? I know it’s just ten steps or so; I was teasing the kid, you doofus. Or does he think I have nefarious intentions? God, I wish he had the maturity of this six year old in my arms. At least Oliver will tell me if I do something that annoys him.

“Keys,” When I make it to the entrance, I ask Zhulong to reach into my pocket and unlock the door. The man looks at me like I’m insane. Well, I suppose I am, but what can I do? I can put the kid down, but he’s holding onto me for dear life, and he’s freezing. I’d have an easier time getting a needle out of a haystack with my teeth. “-it’s the blue key for the top, and the red for the bottom.”

“You trust me with your keys but not with your name…?”

“That’s different. If you do something fishy to me, Oliver will call his mom, right Oliver?”

“Yep!” Zhulong narrows his eyes as if to ask ‘what does that even mean’ but he sighs and does as he’s told.

Although, he has absolutely zero delicacy.

“Hey-!” I take a step back, and the man looks at me like I’ve caught fire. “-easy. Are you trying to grab my keys or my knob?” He tilts his head and furrows his brows. It doesn’t look like he knows what I’m talking about. Well, I managed to avoid it, so it doesn’t really matter now. Why’d he have to shove his hand against me so aggressively? For a man that looks so tired, he sure has a lot of energy to spare.

“Just open the door, Noodle.” He deadpans and stares at me with the look of a sniper aiming for a kill. I’ll add ‘doesn’t like being bossed around’ on my list of not-to-do’s around him.

Or was it the nickname?

He flips through the many keys with an absent-minded look on his face, but begins to grow increasingly annoyed the more he searches for the right pair.

“What are you, a prison ward?” 

“Only if you’re colorblind. What’s taking so long?” He fusses with the keys for a bit longer until he spots the two rubber bands marked in blue and red respectively. I turn my head so he doesn’t see the stupid grin I have on my face. I keep my head turned until I hear the click of the second lock.

Zhulong holds the door open as if he’s waiting for me to head inside first. I give him a puzzling look, and he says, with no hint of sarcasm in his voice- “Ladies first.” Alright, you know what? I deserve that. Don’t look a gifthorse in the mouth or whatever.

“What a gentleman. See this, Oliver? This is how you should treat your future wife.” 

“Ew! I’m never marrying a girl! Mom is the only girl I need!” I’m about to tease the kid when I catch Zhulong nodding his head in agreement. Unfortunately, when he catches me staring, he stops and pretends to act busy by flipping through my keys. I head inside before ruining his newly acquired hobby.

“There’s 27 of them there, so don’t bother counting.”

“What are all of them for?”

“Beats me. I only know what five of them do.” I let Oliver down on the sofa and go searching for his mother’s contact information. It’s a little hard to see in the dark, but I don’t like to turn on the lights late at night. If I keep the lights on, people knock on my door and try to get in past business hours. I stopped keeping the lights on when people started taking advantage of it.

“Now, where did I leave her number… ah,” I don’t save anyone’s number to my personal phone. In truth, I try to keep it as clean and as free of personal details as possible in case it gets confiscated or hacked. Instead, I pin them to my bulletin board in the office if I know I’ll need them. The numbers I always need or use– I memorize. No one has the key to my office except myself and Seito. “-here.” 

I was hoping this would end smoothly, but it appears as if her phone is turned off. There’s no answer once I dial her number. Where could she be at this hour of the night…? I try calling her again just for good measure, but it rings in perpetuity with no answer… That’s unusual. Typically, she picks up right away.

“Oliver, did your mom tell you where she was going?”

“Ummm… work, store, nana’s place.”

“I see…” Oliver’s grandma lives a fair bit away, so she likely missed the last ride home. I know her mother hasn’t been doing well, but she can’t keep losing track of her own obligations as a parent. This isn’t the first time Oliver has been locked out of his own home. 

At the same time, who am I to scold a daughter that is desperate to repay the debt they owe their dying parent? The room is dark, but I can tell her child is worried that she won’t ever come back. For a moment, I worry the same. It’s not like she’s left him alone for this long before today.

But I can’t let a kid think that way. He can become jaded and disillusioned once he comes of age. Once he discovers that unconditional love isn’t real, that not all parents are saints, and that you shouldn’t trust with your whole chest unless you’re prepared to have it robbed dry, he’ll have lived happily for a bit longer. He can lock away his heart and begin to offer me the same rehearsed answers all other adults give each other to mask their weaknesses later. He can turn into someone like me and Zhulong much, much later down the line. For now, he needs his infallible, kind, and loving mother to be by his side. And he can’t be allowed a second of doubt.

I put my phone in my pocket and kneel down next to him so he doesn’t have to arch his neck when he looks at me.

“I’ll get you a pillow and a blanket. Do you think you can sleep here?”

“Is mom not coming back?” I’ve been doing this for so long that a single question shouldn’t hurt me. But whenever the topic of mothers comes up, I find myself irresponsibly attached.

What are you trying to prove, Lucia?

I force a smile and pat him on the head. I’ll usurp your burdens with my palm and lift the weight off your weary mind. I’ll make it look like a magic trick you’ll never be able to crack until you’re older than I am.

“Your mom missed the last tram back. She’ll come pick you up in the morning, okay? I’ll make sure of it,” I put my hands on my knees and push myself off the floor. “-I’ll go get those for you. You must be tired, so try to get some sleep, okay? If something happens, I’ll be in my office, so just knock.”

“Okay!”

I point to Zhulong and then to an empty seat on the couch across from Oliver. Seems he understands what I mean.

I’ll be back soon.