Waiting for the taxi on the side of the road, I started to smell something strong and icy, resembling bitter ginger and… VapoRub? I looked around, trying to find out where it came from. While looking around, my gaze stopped at Geonsu. Oh, was this scent… him?

“Are you an Alpha?” I inquired.

He turned his head slowly and tried to look at me but couldn’t move his head higher to meet my eyes. He paused for a while but then his lips parted and he spoke so shyly, almost whispering.

“Yes. Are you afraid?”

“Dominant?” I asked.

I was not afraid, I felt safe. I was wondering if he would be safe. I am dominant too. He might need medication if I go to his place. But also… would I be okay? Would I really feel better showering at an Alphas place, a place where his pheromones fill the air and everything inside the apartment? What if I reacted even worse than now? And not only about me, what if my state triggered him? I was afraid I would react violently or start nesting inside his home.

“Yes, dominant… Listen, Kento. I am so sorry. I should have told you beforehand.”

His voice was shaky. I had to respond and make clear what I was thinking. He must have misunderstood me.

“No need to apologize. I am asking because I am also dominant. If we are going to your place and sitting in the taxi, you might have a hard time being next to me. You are already leaking. Are you okay?”

“Wait, you still want to go to my place?” He looked puzzled.

“Yes. Is the offer not on the table anymore? I don’t want to impose on you.”

“No! No! You are invited. And don’t worry, I’ll buy inhibitors. I promise.”

 The taxi smelled faintly of old fabric and rain-soaked asphalt. I kept my forehead against the cold window and watched the city lights smear into yellow lines. Every bump in the road made my stomach turn. The sourness clinging to my own scent refused to leave. It sat somewhere in the back of my throat, sharp and unpleasant, like spoiled fruit left too long in the heat. I hoped Geonsu was managing himself. Since we got in the car he didn’t move or say anything. He looked very stressed, and he was squeezing and releasing his fists while he clenched his teeth.

“Kento… Can I release some?” he whispered. “I don’t want to affect you even more than what you have already been through.”

“Yes. It might be better, because right now I hate the way I smell. Can you cover mine?”

“I’ll let a bit out.”

The scent appeared gradually, so slowly I almost missed it. Did he keep it in until now? I couldn’t believe it. I sensed it. The smell of stems snapped between fingers, of crushed green leaves, like fresh herbs bruised against warm skin.  Oregano rubbed between palms until its oils stained the air. Something wild and grassy lingered beneath it, like tall weeds after rain. Strong, even though he only let out so little. It never pushed or went over that volume. He promised to release a little and did so. It simply settled around me. I felt my mind clear and my shoulders drop. I wanted to deny it, but it was true; his scent was relaxing me.

I turned my head to look at him. Geonsu was staring out his own window, his jaw still tense and one hand clenched loosely over his knee. My instinct told me I needed more, my body asked for a deeper scent and my mind agreed.

“Geonsu?” I whispered to him, but he turned to me when he sensed that I had already looked at him. “Can you… let out more, please?”

“Yes.”

Rainwater caught between dense summer grass. The bitterness lingered only briefly before something softer emerged beneath it. It also had a cool tone, fresh but not minty. For all the warmth the scent gave me, it also cooled the tip of my nose and tongue. It was so much, a recessive Omega would drop to their knees, but I felt fine and safe. The car arrived at the destination.

After stepping out of the taxi he walked towards the building’s entrance and took his keys in his hand, opening the main door. After he opened the door and we stepped inside the apartment. He showed me where the bathroom was and guided me there. I was so agitated and excited to be able to clean myself that I could not even look around and get a feel of his apartment. I didn’t even remember which way I walked in. His pheromones were faint inside the apartment, flowing lightly. A familiar scent trailed around my nose… eucalyptus. To my surprise, the light scent calmed me down and cleared my mind.

He brought towels, multiple, put some on the floor in front of the shower to step on and gave me a bathrobe as well.

“I don’t need all of these. One is fine.”

“Choose which one you like best then.”

He put them in the bathroom and even open a new bottle of shower gel, antibacterial soap, shampoo… He was moving quickly and then shut the door, leaving me alone in the bathroom. I started to strip my clothes immediately and rushed into the shower. I turned the water on and moved the handle almost all the way to the left. Hot water streamed out and engulfed my body, but I immediately turned my back to the water and started to clean my anus. I scooped the slimy substance with my fingers and let it be washed away. The fluid even smelled acrid. I probed the opening and noticed that I was for sure not swollen. I knew what happened, but I never thought it would happened so often and so soon.

His bathroom was very clean and organized. I felt the need to moisturize my face after scrubbing my skin and using hot water. I tightened the bathrobe and stepped outside the bathroom, calling out to him. I wanted to ask for some type of cream, but he was not in the apartment. I started to look around his bathroom cabinets and found a face cream. As I reached out for the cream, I tapped other stuff that was cramped inside the cabinet and some stuff fell inside the sink. As I put the stuff back, I heard the door unlock. I stepped out of the bathroom and moved towards the entrance.

“I kind of rummaged around your cabinet looking for a cream…” I was softly launching an apology for looking through his stuff.

“Oh, did you find one? I didn’t think to put it out for you.”

“Yeah, I found something. No worries. Thank you very much again. I was very uncomfortable until now in my clothes so I could not properly thank you. I’m sorry.”

“I get it. It’s fine. I brought you something.”

He handed me a bag after he took something out and walked towards another room. I looked around the corner for him and saw he headed towards the kitchen. He pulled two glasses out. He took some water, opened the pill bottle, he took out of the bag and swallowed two pills. He filled the other glass with water and handed it to me. I drank the water and glanced at the bottle. It was a very potent pheromone and rut inhibitor. And he took 2 pills at once?

“You can change in the bathroom or bedroom. Whichever you prefer.”

I could change inside the bathroom, but I was nosy and wanted to see more of his apartment, so I asked him to show me the bedroom. The bathroom was too damp for me to change comfortably anyway. He didn’t say anything and showed me the way. He closed the door behind me after he turned on the lights.

I rummaged around in the bag and found underwear and some black sweatpants, brand new.  He even bought me socks. Inside there was a small packet of medicine. It was an Omega Pheromone Calmer, known to be of first help after either sexual assault or attacks on Omegas. I felt like I didn’t need it, but I thought maybe he wanted me to take it, to make it easier on him. I looked around his room. He had some books on his nightstand, reading glasses and a tattoo cream. His wardrobe was open and I could see multiple shirts inside. On the right side of the bed, there was a gym bag. I felt drawn to it and moved it a bit. There was a T-Shirt inside. An icy chill eucalyptus smell lingered and opened up my nose and made me shiver.  

I turned off the lights and stepped out of the bedroom, still wearing the robe around me, even though I had pants on.

“Geonsu? Do you want me to take these? Do you have a hard time, despite the suppressants you took?”

“You don’t have to. I thought you might need them, so I bought them. Don’t take them if you don’t want to… why are you still wearing the robe?”

I tried to put back on the shirt I had today, but it smelled like that man. I put it inside the bag he gave me after I emptied it. With the bag in hand, I showed it to him and said quietly.

“It smells like him so… I don’t have any other shirt…”

He stood up immediately and went inside the bedroom. He brought out a hoodie and handed it to me.

“I’m sorry, I forgot about that. I didn’t think to get you a shirt.”

“You didn’t have to get me anything. Thank you, you are very thoughtful.”

“I saw those meds while buying mine, so I thought that if you needed them, best buy them. If not, no big deal. I take pheromone suppressants most times, but… I thought that, in case you don’t need the meds I bought for you, I should at least take rut inhibitors as well. Take extra precautions, you know?”

“Oh, yes. Thank you…”

I put the hoodie on and let my hair down.

“Listen, it’s getting very late. I don’t want to send you home alone though. I’m on the edge after what happened. But I also have to go to work in a couple of hours. I can offer you the bedroom to sleep over, and I will sleep on the couch. Would you be comfortable with sleeping over?”

“You can have the bedroom. I don’t mind the couch. It’s your home after all.”

“No, I think you should sleep in the bedroom. You need to rest well and not feel anxious. You will feel more protected sleeping. So, is that a yes?”

“Then, if you insist. I’m not going to turn down the more comfortable room, hahaha!”

“No. I meant, are you okay with sleeping over? You didn’t answer me that.”

I looked at him with a questioning face. I already said it would be okay for me to sleep on the couch and accepted the bed, I didn’t say no to the offer. It looked like he really wanted to hear a clear yes from me.

“Yes.”

“Okay.”

He went into the bedroom, took one pillow and a spare blanket out of the dresser and prepared the couch for sleeping. I went inside the bedroom and sat on the bed.

“Here. A T-Shirt to sleep in, in case you get warm. I am really beat, I need to sleep right away. I’m sorry for letting you all alone. If you need something, wake me up.” He put a glass of water on the nightstand for me and looked at me for a moment.

“I’m all right. Thank you, Geonsu. Good night.”

He nodded and left the room. The light in my room was not on, so I could see the light from the living room still on, looking at the gaps in the bottom rail. After some minutes, the light was off. I climbed the bed and turned around in it for a couple of minutes. I could not fall asleep. As I was tossing and turning on the left side of the bed, I moved more towards the center and right side. Suddenly, I smelled something familiar, but faint. I stopped and looked over at the second pillow. I buried my left side of the nose deeper in the sheet of the pillow. There it was. The smell was sharp, earthy, dry, and slightly green botanical undertones like a raspy eucalyptus. His scent. Before I could inhale the pheromones deep inside my lungs, there was a knock at the door.

“Kento? Can I come in? I need to get my work clothes for tomorrow. Sorry, I forgot before. Can I open the door?”

My heart dropped and a cold sweat built around my chest.

“Yes, I’m not sleeping. Come inside.”

I hoped he would not notice my state, but I knew realistically he would sense my pheromones when he opened the door. He would think I’m in this state because of what happened in the bar and because I didn’t take the medicine he bought. But I knew it wasn’t because of those disgusting pheromones in the restroom. I was in this state because of him. He opened the door and paused for a second, then came in and started to look inside the closet in the dark. There was some light coming from outside through the window and I could see his back, rummaging around in the closet, his shoulder blades moving up and down. I felt bad, having this man sleep on the couch in his apartment, have to ask permission to enter his bedroom to look for work clothes and not get enough sleep, to have me take over his apartment and not even complain or sigh.

“Okay, I’m sorry for bothering you. Sleep well.”

As his steps got more silent and I figured he went to sleep. I wanted to calm down, but I didn’t know how. I remembered his scent while waiting for the taxi. Could it calm me down? I did something so impulsive I didn’t even have time to think about it: I reached for his gym bag and got the T-Shirt out. I smelled it and held it tight. I felt my eyes drop almost instantly and felt reassured. Then suddenly, my nape started to hurt so badly I felt like it might start to bleed again. I stood up properly and checked to see if I bled on his bed. I could not breathe properly, trying to recover from the pain. As I was starting to have a clear mind again, I felt ashamed nauseous. After filling my lungs with his pheromones, suddenly, I wanted to burn the T-Shirt and throw up. My body was trying to purge itself, punishing me. And sadly, I believed for a second that I deserved it.

After I drank the water left on the nightstand, calmed down, I needed to use the bathroom. I had to wipe the sweat and wash my hands. I was anxious, because I had to walk through the living room to reach the bathroom. I opened the door slowly and listened for a while, testing to see if he was truly asleep. I managed to reach the bathroom. I cleaned my hands with water and soap and used a towel to check if my nape bled. My eyes didn’t adjust to the darkness quickly enough after staying in the bathroom light and I stumbled over the coffee table. I hurt my foot and tried to stay silent, but it seemed I woke him up.

“Hmm… are you okay? What’s the matter? Do you need something? Are you not feeling well?”

“No, everything is fine. I just needed to use the bathroom. I’m sorry for waking you up. Go back to sleep.” I whispered to him, standing in the dark, rubbing my hurt foot on my other leg.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Please, sleep.”

I felt my heartbeat inside my throat. All the turmoil of today made me tired, physically and mentally. I hopped into the bed on the left side, where his pheromones were not present. The moment my head hit the pillow I fell asleep.