I slept longer than apparently allowed by my mom’s standards. 

By the time I made it into the kitchen, she had already recruited Cynthia and Alex, and the four of us spent most of the afternoon getting in each other’s way. There was barely enough room to turn around without somebody asking you to move. Every available piece of counter space had disappeared beneath bowls, cutting boards, bottles, spices and ingredients my mom insisted she still needed.

We had been preparing food since around one. By six-thirty, the chicken and pork were finally in the oven, most of the sides had been pushed into the refrigerator and Cynthia had taken over the salads.

My mom had left the table to me. Christmas required three different glasses per person.

I arranged them exactly where she wanted them, along with the plates edged in silver, the napkins with small snowflakes embroidered across them and enough candles and winter decorations to make moving anything on the table more complicated than necessary.

Once my mom and Cynthia disappeared into the bedroom to get ready, the apartment became slightly quieter. I could still hear them laughing from behind the closed door every now and then.

Alex helped me finish the silverware before waving me away from the table. “Go get ready. I’ll check the oven.”

I changed and secured my hair with a large clip, then pulled a few strands loose around my face. I checked the back in the mirror and adjusted it once more until my hair still covered my nape.

The intercom rang and I heard Alex leave the kitchen. I didn’t think much of it at first. Romina knew she could simply walk in.

Then somebody knocked. My hands stopped in my hair. Geonsu. I left my room, but by the time I reached the hallway, Alex had already opened the door.

Geonsu stood on the other side with his shoulders slightly raised against the cold, a bag in one hand.

“Oh, hello. I’m Geonsu. You must be Mister Beck—”

“Who are you?”

Geonsu stopped. Alex had one hand on the door and hadn’t moved aside to let him through.

“I think you might have the wrong apartment,” Alex said.

“Alex.” I walked faster. “He doesn’t. Mom invited him.”

Both of them looked at me. Something in Alex’s face changed, although not enough for him to move immediately.

I reached the door and opened it farther myself. “Geonsu, come in.”

“Hi.” Geonsu gave me a small smile before looking toward Alex again. “Sorry. I thought—”

“You’re fine.” I stepped aside so he could enter.

Geonsu took off his shoes near the door and started unbuttoning his coat while Alex remained beside me. I could feel him looking at me before he leaned slightly closer.

“Who is he?” he asked quietly.

“An acquaintance.”

I stopped answering Alex when I noticed Geonsu still standing in the middle of the hallway with two bags in his hands. Whatever Alex’s problem was, he could figure it out himself. My mom had invited Geonsu; that should have been enough for him.

The voices must have carried because my mom and Cynthia came out of the bedroom.

“Geonsu, my dear!” My mom immediately waved him farther inside. “Welcome. Don’t stand there like that.”

Geonsu straightened slightly.

“This is Cynthia, my best friend. She works at Bella-Donna. Have you two really never met? You work next to each other.”

“Hello.” Geonsu smiled at her before looking back at my mom. “Good to see you again, Mrs. Becker.”

My mom stared at him. Cynthia looked at her. Then they both started laughing. I covered my mouth, already knowing what was coming. Geonsu looked between the three of us, completely lost.

“Dear, I’m not married.” My mom touched his arm as she passed him. “Denise. We already established this.”

“Oh.” His eyes briefly went toward Alex.

“Come inside.”

Geonsu followed her into the living room, still looking mildly embarrassed. He held one of the bags out to her.

“I brought you something. I hope you like it.”

“You didn’t have to bring me anything,” she said while already reaching inside.

It was a bottle of white wine. I didn’t recognize it, but my mom apparently did. Her eyebrows rose as she turned the bottle around to read the label.

“Oh, this is nice…”

She looked considerably more pleased than she was trying to sound and disappeared toward the kitchen with the bottle.

“We have something for you too. Kento, it’s in your room.”

I was about to go get it when Geonsu moved the second bag toward me. He didn’t say anything. He simply held it there, looking somewhere around my shoulder instead of directly at me.

“For me?”

He nodded.

I took the bag and looked inside. There was a narrow box wrapped in silver paper at the bottom. Normally, I would have waited.

The box opened in my hands, revealing a small silver espresso spoon.

I lifted it from the velvet beneath it. The handle was narrow and intricately shaped, ending in a small white stone, while the bowl had been sculpted into a seashell. The ridges caught the light when I turned it between my fingers.

“Mom…” I said as I was already halfway into the kitchen. “Mom, look.”

“Oh my.” She reached for it.

“No, wait. I haven’t even held it properly yet.” I stared at her with the spoon against my chest.

Cynthia started laughing. It took me another few seconds to remember there was somebody in the living room who had actually given it to me.

I hurried back.

Geonsu was standing exactly where I had left him, although now he was smiling.

“I’m sorry.” I held up the spoon. 

“It’s okay.”

“Thank you. I really like it.” I looked at it again before looking back at him. “How did you know?”

“I asked Romina.” His smile deepened slightly.

I went to put the spoon somewhere safe before my mom could steal it from me, then returned with the box we had left in my room for him.

“This one’s yours.”

Geonsu looked genuinely surprised when I handed it over.

My mom appeared behind me with several glasses. “My forgetful son picked it. Apparently, he owes you one.”

I looked at her. She ignored me and continued into the living room. Geonsu glanced at me before opening the box.

The scarf inside was dark navy, a cashmere and merino blend my mom and I had chosen together. I had noticed he wore scarves often, and since his was still sitting in my room after I forgot to return it, replacing it had seemed appropriate.

He ran his thumb over the fabric before lifting it from the box.

“Thank you.”

“You like it?”

“Yeah.” He rubbed the material between his fingers again. “I’ve never had one this nice,” he said as he carefully folded it back into the box.

Romina arrived not long after, carrying the same bottle of tequila she brought every Christmas. Cynthia cheered when she saw it and my mom immediately told them both to stay away from it until we had eaten something.

Neither of them listened.

By the time we sat down for dinner, Geonsu seemed less nervous than when he arrived. Cynthia and Romina had taken over one side of the conversation almost entirely, catching up on something. My mom sat beside Geonsu and kept offering him food despite the fact that he had already eaten two plates.

I ended up almost directly across from him.

Every now and then, I caught him looking at me between conversations. Once our eyes met, he lowered his immediately and reached for his glass.

Apparently, the phone call hadn’t completely left his mind either.

“So, Geonsu.” Alex spoke from beside me.

Geonsu looked up. “Yes?”

“You work at the restaurant next to Bella-Donna?”

“Yeah. Toscana.”

“What do you do there?”

“Sauté, mostly. I work the line.”

“He’s being modest,” my mom interrupted. “Cony showed me some of his food.”

Geonsu smiled into his plate. “I’m not being modest. I really just work the line.”

Alex chuckled lightly. “How long have you been there?”

“Long time. I started washing dishes there when I was sixteen… or seventeen.”

That caught my attention. I knew he had worked there before his apprenticeship, but I hadn’t realized he had been that young.

“Seventeen?” Cynthia asked. “And you’re still there?”

“Unfortunately, they can’t get rid of me.” He chuckled. “I did leave for a little while,” he added. “But I’ve been cooking professionally for about seven years now.”

Alex nodded and went back to his food. Nothing about the conversation seemed unusual, although he had gone considerably quieter.

“How old are you?” Cynthia asked.

Geonsu looked at her. “Thirty-two.”

“Oh, you’re a baby,” she said, her voice pitched as if talking to a kitten.

Geonsu laughed. “Thank you.”

I smiled, but something beside me moved. Alex had stopped cutting his food for a moment. His knife continued through the pork a second later, and he didn’t say anything.

I looked at Geonsu again.

I already knew he was older than me. I had known that from the beginning, so I wasn’t sure why hearing the number at the table made me look at him differently.

There were a few grey hairs above his ear.

I had noticed them before in Toscana’s kitchen, but beneath the warmer light in our apartment, they stood out against the black. When he smiled at something my mom said, faint lines appeared beside his eyes and deeper ones formed around his mouth.

I wasn’t sure there was anything more interesting about it than that until I glanced toward Alex. He was looking at him too.

My mom reached across the table for the potatoes. “Geonsu, you’re an Alpha, right?”

“Yeah.”

“I thought so.”

Geonsu looked amused. “Was it that obvious?”

My mom said nothing but gestured to Cynthia and me with a bicep flex which made almost the whole table laugh. 

“Oh.” He touched the side of his face as soon as he caught her move.

“What kind?” Romina asked.

Geonsu looked at her, confused. “What kind of what?”

“Alpha.”

“Oh.” He swallowed. “Dominant.”

The movement beside me was smaller this time. I wouldn’t have noticed it if I hadn’t already been paying attention. Alex reached for his wine. My mom, meanwhile, looked delighted by an entirely different part of the conversation.

“See? This is why I don’t understand any of this. I raised an Omega and still don’t know half the terminology.”

Geonsu glanced toward me. “Was it hard?” He smiled before looking at my mom.

“Oh God, don’t remind me,” she sighed and got animated. “He used to get into my coffee beans and hide them to smell them at night when he was 5. When I hid them, he searched for something similar and hid dried kidney bones in his room. He must have hidden them somewhere damp, because mold grew and he couldn’t go inside his room for weeks!”

Everyone started laughing. Even Cynthia, who had heard this story hundreds of times. Everybody was laughing at me. But I watched Geonsu as he laughed, tipping his head back slightly. His Adam’s apple rose sharply along his throat with the sound before dropping again when he swallowed.

I reached for my wine.

The conversation moved elsewhere after that. Cynthia and Romina returned to whatever television show they had been discussing earlier, while my mom discovered that Geonsu owned enough books about astronomy to make the mistake of mentioning it to her.

That occupied them for a while.

Alex didn’t say much. At first, I thought he had simply lost interest. Then I noticed him looking across the table again while Geonsu listened to my mom explain something, his expression perfectly pleasant.

I leaned slightly closer.

“What is up with you today?” I asked quietly.

Alex looked at me. “Nothing.” His eyes moved toward Geonsu once more. “I’ll talk to you later.” 

I waited until dinner was mostly over before following Alex into the kitchen.

“You said you wanted to talk to me.”

Alex glanced toward the dining room. “Not here.”

That irritated me immediately.

He grabbed his cigarettes from the counter and nodded toward the balcony. I followed him outside, pulling the door mostly closed behind us.

The cold caught me through my shirt almost immediately. Alex lit his cigarette before speaking.

“How well do you know him?”

I leaned against the railing. “Why?”

“Kento–”

“No,” I interrupted him, my chest already tightening. “You’ve been strange with him since dinner. Tell me why.”

He exhaled toward the street. “I didn’t realize he was that much older than you.”

I stared at him. That was such an unnecessary worry, it almost made me scoff. “That’s it?”

“No.” Alex turned to me. “He’s thirty-two. He’s a dominant Alpha. You barely know him and he’s already spending Christmas here.”

“My mom invited him.”

“I know.”

“Then what exactly is the problem?”

Alex was quiet for a moment. “I don’t know what he wants from you,” he said quietly. 

Something about the way he said it made my shoulders tense. “Neither do I. We’re friends, Alex.”

“Are you?” He rubbed his thumb along the cigarette between his fingers. “Because I watched him look at you all evening, and I don’t think he came here because he needed another friend.”

Heat reached my face despite the cold. “That still isn’t your business.”

He looked frustrated now. “I’m trying to tell you to be careful.”

“With what? An Alpha?”

“With somebody older than you who might know exactly what he’s doing while you—” He stopped.

“While I what?” I clenched my fists as I looked at him. Alex looked away. “Go ahead. Say it.”

“Kento…”

“While I what?”

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. “You haven’t exactly had the chance to figure this stuff out normally…”

For a moment, I didn’t say anything.

The voices from inside became strangely noticeable through the balcony door. Somebody laughed. A glass touched the table.

Alex kept speaking, but I wasn’t really listening anymore.

My last relationship had apparently become evidence that I couldn’t recognize what somebody wanted from me. That I needed somebody else to stand beside me and decide which men were dangerous before I could make the mistake myself.

“You’re not my dad,” I blurted out.

Alex went silent and I regretted it almost immediately. His face didn’t change much, but he looked away from me and took another drag from his cigarette.

I folded my arms against the cold.

“You don’t get to decide that I can’t tell when somebody is treating me badly because one person already did,” I added, quieter.

He stubbed his cigarette out and remained beside me.

“I shouldn’t have said that.” Alex nodded. “But I still don’t like the age difference.”

We both chuckled as I rolled my eyes and looked toward the street. Alex was quiet long enough that I finally looked at him. He leaned against the railing beside me, leaving some space between us.

Then Alex nudged my arm lightly with his elbow. “I am sorry.”

“I shouldn’t have said… the dad thing… I am sorry too,” I whispered.

“That one hurt a little.”

“I know.”

He smiled faintly. “Asshole.”

I leaned into him and let him put an arm around my shoulders. We stayed outside long enough to finish another cigarette between us before the cold finally drove us back inside.

The apartment had gotten considerably louder in our absence.