With a coffee in one hand and an umbrella in the other he waited for me like he always did. He studied architecture, so his faculty was farther away from the science labs and rooms on campus. Every Monday he would come at 14:45 and wait for me, coffee in hand. We shared the first kiss of the day around that hour. He complained, telling me he was going insane, missing me so much while he was sitting in class. We studied together, ate together and made love. On weekends I would sleep over in his dorm room and Sunday night he would walk me back to my dorm room. This is how we spent our first semester at university.

“Kento, do you want to go to the aquarium today?” he asked.

“Hmm… again? You know I love it there, but let’s do something you like doing, Johan.”

“But they have a new whale exhibition. Are you sure?” He smirked and looked at me sideways. As much as I wanted to say otherwise, I couldn’t pass on this opportunity.

“Okay, but this time let’s also go and eat next door. You know that Italian restaurant?”

“Everything you want, you get.” He whispered and he stood up and approached me, closing his eyes slowly and kissing me softly. “Let’s go!”

It was Monday again. My laboratory work started again. I walked out of the building at 14:58. I had to stay longer because my results were not right. I smiled at him and reached to hug and kiss him like always.

"You didn't answer my texts." Johan said, dodging my kiss.

"I was in lab." Is he pouting? How cute!

"For three hours?" His tone didn’t change.

"My phone was in my bag."

"I thought something happened."

He hugged me back and kissed my forehead. As I was sipping my coffee, he told me about his projects and complained about his professors. I was fascinated by how smart he was. I haven’t told him yet, but if we get married, I wanted Johan to design our home.

“Don’t you think your hair is kind of long? Too long maybe?” He asked suddenly.

“Hmm, I don’t know. I like it. It only reaches past my shoulders. Do you not like it?” He usually never said anything about my appearance. He even told me my way of dressing was what attracted him to me.

“I feel like you could trim it a bit.”

“I… I’ll think about it. If you like it better that way… Oh! Yoona invited us on Saturday to karaoke. The sports department and mathematics department will also be there. Wanna go?”

“No, I don’t like Yoona.” He answered coldly.

“Well, there are others there. You don’t have to interact.”

“I also have my group project Saturday. We need to get it going. We can’t go.”

“Oh, I am free on Saturday. I will go…” I couldn’t finish because Johan interrupted me.

“What do you mean you’ll go? Why do you always argue? Let’s not go.”

“Okay. I’ll let Yoona know…”

As exams and presentations approached, we argued more often than before. It happens sometimes. I knew Johan was stressed. Truthfully, I was stressed too. By the next morning neither of us even mentioned it again.

I started to take birth control around the 4^th month of us being in a relationship. I always set my alarm for 8 am, before I would leave for classes. I reached for it on my nightstand and wanted to pop the pill open, when I saw it already half open. Not only the Thursday one, but the rest of the month as well. I think I must have dropped it or sat on it and damaged the container. I decided to get a new pack, as them staying open until I used them would wear down at the potency. I mentioned this to Johan, as both of us took this seriously and he promised to get me the pills while I was in class.

“Here. Did you take the one at 8?” he asked when we finally saw each other that afternoon.

“Yeah. Did you tell them to give you the proFav one?”

“Yeah, I’m not stupid. Why, don’t you trust me?”

I asked because the package looked similar to the one I could not take. No reason for him to get so angry. I didn’t say anything, as I was grateful he went and bought them for me. We went out and had our date like normal. He suddenly asked me.

“Do you take pheromone suppressants?”

“No…” What a question. Why? Where does this come from?

“I think you should. As you passed the sports department they turned to stare at you. You should get your scent under control.”

“What? You don’t even know if all of them were Alphas. They might not have even looked at me…”

“And you know which ones are and which aren’t? Interesting!” He interrupted me, his voice got louder.

“What are you implying?” I felt like he danced around the subject. I hated that. He started doing it lately.

“Never mind. I don’t want to argue again. Kento. I love you; I want to keep you safe. You know I get anxious about you. I am sorry.”

“Yes. I know. I love you too. I will look into it. The suppressants, I mean.”

“Yeah, that would be nice.” He smiled and stroked my cheek.

The weekend approached again and my spending the night at Johan’s was the standard. We lingered around the room for a while and after a while we started kissing on his bed. He was more aggressive than usual, which I didn’t mind. We would change the way we made love a lot of times. But then suddenly, he flipped me around. It was unexpected but nothing that he had never done before. He started to release his pheromones, and he must have released a lot. He was recessive, but the amount was over the usual amount we used in bed. After some time, he still didn’t start to do anything to me, like prep me or kiss me. He just stood over me for a while and then he said.

“Stay still.”

All of a sudden, he was oozing so many pheromones, I felt my arms go numb as I tried to turn to look at him. He pushed my head down. I didn’t know what was happening.

“Johan? Johan, stop.” I said to him. He didn’t respond. “Johan! I am scared… what are you…”

At that exact moment, my eyes filled with tears. My throat closed and didn’t let the words escape. I started to squirm and move around, but his grip never lessened. I was begging him to let go. My pheromones were out of control, and my head started to hurt.

“I always give and you always take! Why do you act as if you can’t give me this?! What do I ever get in return for all I do? You, prancing yourself around others!” He screamed at me for the first time.

The moment he stopped talking I felt a sharp pain in the back of my neck. I felt my flesh open up and I felt the blood dripping down on my skin. I started to cry louder, but he pushed my head deeper into the bed. Pain exploded through my body; everything hurt at once. My back arched so hard it hurt. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't even scream properly. For a second I thought he would stop. That he would realize and see I was crying. But he didn't. Maybe it was because he was recessive, but it took him a while to properly bite my glands. I tried to move around, I resisted but I felt like I was losing consciousness, so I stopped struggling. What scared me more was now passing out and not knowing what was going on around me. What he was doing at this moment I knew. I figured it out. He just marked me.

My neck was in pain, throbbing and bleeding. I felt like he slashed it open. He stood up and let me go but I couldn’t move. My tears were dripping down onto the bed.

“Now, everyone will know you belong to me.” He said, stroking my back and hair. “Why are you crying? You told me you wanted us to be together forever. This is the best next thing. Get yourself together, I’m taking a shower.”

The moment he said I belonged to him, my ears started ringing. I could hear the shower barely, as I lay limp on the bed. The silence was uncanny. I suddenly realized what happened and that I needed to get out of there. I put my shirt back on and tried my best to leave quietly. I was afraid he would come out of the shower and come after me. I managed to get outside the building, but my legs could not carry me anymore. My shirt felt wet from the blood and my vision blurred.

I don’t remember much afterwards. Someone called the cops because they saw me passing out in the street with blood on my clothes. The next months passed in interviews, hospital visits and courtrooms. Eventually I was told Johan would spend at least fifteen years in prison.

After the trial, I was still in a daze. I would get phantom pain and feel his scent. The first time I went into heat after the assault I had to be admitted to the hospital.

That day that I relized that his pheromones were going to haunt me forever.