I shouldn’t be laughing.

The thought hit Felix almost immediately. His smile faltered.

How can you laugh after today?

His father’s voice echoed inside his head before he could stop it.

You represent me.

Liability.

Weakness.

His heartbeat stumbled. The warmth he’d been feeling evaporated.

They’re going to know.

You were seen.

You lost control.

You let someone hold you.

His breathing threatened to shorten again.

No. Stop. Not here. Not with him.

He forced himself to focus on the rhythm of their footsteps.

Left. Right. Left. Right.

Slowly… The panic receded. Beside him, Hyunjin hadn’t noticed. Or maybe… He had. Because without looking over, he slowed his pace just enough for Felix to match it comfortably. Such a tiny adjustment. Most people wouldn’t have noticed. Felix did. He noticed everything.

————————-

He’s trying so hard.

Hyunjin thought.

Not to cry. Not to panic. Not to let me see.

He doesn’t realize… I’ve already seen it.

Not the whole story. Just enough. Enough to know he’s been carrying it alone.

Hyunjin glanced sideways. Felix’s shoulders looked a little less tense than before. Only a little. It was progress. Tiny. Fragile. Real. 

I don’t need answers today.

He repeated the thought to himself.

I just need him to know he doesn’t have to carry this alone anymore.

He wasn’t sure when he’d made that decision. Only that it no longer felt like a decision. It felt… Obvious.

———————————

Felix stared straight ahead. He didn’t dare look at Hyunjin again. Because every time he did… It became harder to imagine walking away. And that terrified him more than anything. Not because he didn’t want Hyunjin close. Because he did. Far more than he should.

He had spent years convincing himself that caring about people only gave them something to take away.

Then Hyunjin appeared. Patient. Kind. Infuriatingly persistent. And somehow… Instead of feeling like another weakness…He felt like the first place Felix had ever wanted to run toward instead of away. That thought scared him enough to make his chest ache.

Because if “they” ever realized that… He didn’t let himself finish the thought. He couldn’t. Some fears were too dangerous to give words. So instead… He kept walking. And, for the first time in a very long time… He wasn’t walking alone.

—————————

They’d wandered farther than either of them intended. The streets had grown quieter, the evening sun sinking lower until everything was painted in soft gold. Neither of them had mentioned going home. Neither of them seemed eager to be the first.

Hyunjin shoved his hands into his pockets, stealing another glance at Felix. He looked…lighter. Not happy. Not yet. But lighter. Like someone who had finally set down one corner of a burden they’d been carrying alone.

“So…” Hyunjin started.

“So?”

“I still owe you a second date.”

Felix blinked.

“I thought we’d already had one.”

Hyunjin smiled.

“I don’t think panic-running through downtown counts.”

A quiet laugh escaped Felix.

“I suppose not.”

“I mean…”

Hyunjin scratched the back of his neck.

“I’d like a do-over.”

Felix’s heart stuttered. A do-over. Not an ending. Not a goodbye. Another chance. His mind immediately supplied every reason to say no.

It’s dangerous. They’ll notice. You’ll ruin his life. Leave before they make you.

But then another memory surfaced. Warm hands. A steady heartbeat.

“I’ve got you.”

Felix looked over. Hyunjin wasn’t pushing. He wasn’t expecting an answer. He’d simply…offered. Just like he had with his hand on the bench. A choice. Always a choice.

“I…” Felix swallowed. “I don’t know if I’m very good company.”

“I disagree.”

“You’ve only seen me cry.”

“I’ve also seen you insult mailboxes.”

Felix frowned.

“…You said we weren’t going to talk about that.”

“I lied.”

“You lied?”

“I’m a deeply flawed man.”

A laugh escaped Felix before he could stop it. Hyunjin smiled to himself. There it is.

“I’d like to take you somewhere.” Hyunjin continued.

“No crowds. No expectations. No pressure.”

He paused.

“And if halfway through you decide you want to leave…”

He shrugged.

“We leave.”

No guilt. No disappointment. Just… We’ll leave. Felix stared at him. His chest ached in the strangest way. No one had ever offered him an escape before. Usually, saying yes meant he was trapped.

With Hyunjin… Saying yes still left the door open.

He found himself smiling. Small. Nervous.

“…Okay.”

Hyunjin blinked.

“…Okay?”

Felix nodded once.

“…Okay.”

The grin that spread across Hyunjin’s face was impossible to hide.

“Tomorrow?”

Felix hesitated for only a heartbeat.

“…Tomorrow.”

They reached the corner where their paths split. Neither of them moved. For a few seconds they simply stood there, smiling like two complete idiots.

Hyunjin finally laughed.

“We’re terrible at saying goodbye.”

Felix looked down, unable to hide his smile. “…I don’t think I want to.”

Neither of them said anything after that. There wasn’t anything left to say. For the first time in years… Felix walked home afraid. Afraid of them. Afraid of what would happen if they found out. But for the very first time… He was also looking forward to tomorrow. And somehow… That felt even more terrifying.