Entry 1657:

Date:  August 12th, 2061

It’s hot. Unnaturally hot; these past two days have been nothing but uncertainty and blistering heat. I was so sure she’d kill me; I still am. I just can’t figure out why it’s taking so long. 

Two days ago she spared my life and dragged me by my wrists through the woods for miles. We spent the night in a small cave. She killed the critter that originally inhabited it and ate the raw meat from its bones. Despite this, I felt more comfortable than I had been since I crawled out from the bunker. I was safe. If not from her, at least from everything else the radiation touched. Until she killed me, I didn’t have to worry about getting violently mauled by the countless monsters roaming these woods. That thought was enough to let me fall into a deep sleep. 

In the morning I woke up hanging over her shoulder as she trudged through the woods. She was talking, to herself it seemed. Small mumbles of something I couldn’t understand. When she realized I had woken up, she quickly went quiet and, in a rather harsh movement, placed me back on the ground. I remember the look in her eyes; it was like she was still trying to figure out what to do with me. Ultimately, she settled for once again dragging me through the woods by my wrists. 

Her legs are longer than mine, and she walked so fast I was practically jogging to keep up. She didn’t stop walking until the sun began to dip behind the horizon. My legs threatened to give out with each step as the exhaustion washed over me with drowning intensity.. Yet the sight before me made me forget about my fatigue. 

For a brief second, the breath was gone from my lungs as I stared out at the biggest colony of Exposed I had ever, no, any Mole had ever witnessed. We stood on a hill and gazed down at the concrete warehouse that stretched half a city block in length and seemed to house nearly a thousand. It was clear by the green moss over most of it and its rubble-like appearance that it had been greatly damaged in the war.  

My gawking was cut short as she threw me back over her shoulder and marched towards the entrance. Once inside, I was hit with the strong smell of dirt and metal. It didn’t take long for me to realize everyone here looked similar. They all had those same radioactive features that she had. The height being the most recognizable. I noticed a few other moles scattered around. It wasn’t hard to pick them out. The part that made me nervous was how they all stuck to an Exposed like a dog without a leash. 

Now I understand why, or at least I think I’m beginning to. When we arrived at a small room, she finally put me down. She began talking, what I assume was some kind of directions, but all I could do was stare back blankly. I could see the anger growing on her face as she grabbed my bruised wrist and shoved me into the makeshift bathroom. That was the first real hot shower I’d taken in years; that experience alone was enough for me to let her kill me. It was heavenly. She even gave me new clothes. Simple tan combat pants with a few holes I could patch up and a black T-shirt with an oddly cute character of a sleeping cat in the bottom corner. For a moment, I thought maybe I’d misjudged her, this place—maybe even all of the Exposed. That thought was shattered the moment I stepped out of the bathroom. She’d been waiting for me. Within a second, she had shoved me against the wall and placed chained cuffs on my wrists. I don’t know how I missed them originally. The hope in me died the second she stepped away, and I realized I was a prisoner; it was quickly replaced by my anger. 

For the last two days I’ve been chained up in this room. It’s got a window that lets a fair amount of light in, a small cot, a desk, and even a little plant in the corner. Every few hours someone, usually that same woman, comes in, places me in the bathroom, and waits 15 minutes before chaining me back up. I’m smart enough to know that’s not a chance to escape. She could snap me in half in less than a second. 

Two times a day she comes in and gives me some food; most of it is raw mutant meat, but since I haven’t eaten anything, today they actually cooked it. The most curious thing about this situation is how at night she comes in really late and passes out beside me on the cot. She’s gone when I wake up. I’ve noticed the way she watches me. Like she is trying to figure me out, just as much as I am her. Other than the chains, it almost reminds me of before the fall, a shitty dorm room with a passive-aggressive roommate. My goal is to figure out what she wants with me, but to do that, I need to understand her.