I'm free - NEIGHTZ

   As life passed before my eyes and my expectations dropped drastically, I began to see Inyeon as nothing more than a myth—a tale spun to fool those who dreamed of living something real. Yet, I was always told that what Inyeon creates, nothing can destroy.

   Over the last few months, amidst the secrets and lies I kept telling myself, a feeling burned inside me once again like an eternal flame, making me believe that Inyeon was real after all. It was that very same desire to chase an old dream, one I had somehow left locked away in a dark place where the light of hope could never reach. Yet, somehow, that light always found its way to it, bringing it back to the surface time and time again.

   That contract sitting on the kitchen worktop was far more than just a pile of paper filled with jargon and endless paragraphs for a deal with one of the world's biggest streamers. It was the bridge between my life as an Idol and becoming a world-renowned actor. It was what stood between me and my greatest dream so far.

   One signature, and the life I had always dreamed of would be mine.

After all, what were two years alongside the most clueless, idiotic bloke I’d ever met, when the reward was so much greater than the price I’d have to pay?

 

   Sign it…

   In that moment, Inyeon was nothing more than a distant whisper, as the thought of this being something far greater than it actually was never even crossed my mind. All that surfaced were the memories of that show. Of the disaster that made me question the skills I’d spent years perfecting.

   If I had known that out of thousands of potential actors, Alexei Carter would be the one chosen, I would never—under any circumstances—have pushed Aiko to get me an audition for the cast of Secrets Between Souls. But I pushed. I pushed, I auditioned, and I got the part.

   Sign it, San…

   Why did life have to be like this?

   Why did chasing my dreams carry such a heavy price tag?

   It would be so much simpler if the challenges thrown at everyone were less intense. But I knew that was just how life worked. I truly believed that one of life's true meanings was the way it taught you crucial lessons, but always in ways you never thought possible.

   Until now, the hardest lesson life had handed me was patience. I knew I was still young, but it had taken me years to achieve what I was so proud to have conquered… Did life really need to throw even more hurdles in my way?

   “What are you waiting for, San?” asked Aiko, pulling me back to reality as she grabbed the contract and tapped it against my chest. “Just sign it already so we can go out and celebrate.”

   “I’m not signing this.”

   She froze, glaring at me with the exact same terrifying look she gave me the day I accidentally lost Jihoon’s passport during a joke at the airport on our way to Australia.

   “What do you mean you’re not signing it?” Her eyebrows furrowed, creasing her forehead. “Wasn’t this the bloody opportunity you wanted so badly? The one that made me fly all the way to London, practically begging on my knees in front of that bloody producer to let you audition, even after the call had closed and another actor was already cast?”

   I clenched my jaw, running my tongue along the roof of my mouth as her eyes devoured my soul. Not literally, but that was certainly how Aiko’s 'I’m going to kill you' glare felt.

   “I just…”

   “No, no, no,” she cut in frantically, wagging her index finger at me. “Don’t give me that. You wanted this, and now you’ve got it. Sign the damn thing and let’s celebrate.”

   “I can’t sign this,” I muttered, leaning my hip against the worktop and propping my arm against the wall. “If I’d known he was going to be my romantic lead, I’d have never asked you to do this.”

   Aiko stared at me in a terrifying silence. She was going to murder me; it was written all over her face. Her lovely shade of brown eyes looked darker, a clear sign she wanted to end my life. Properly end it.

   “Are you seriously taking me for a fool just because Alexei is your co-star?”

   I dropped my head. Aiko let out a lifeless laugh, the sound echoing through the flat and making me feel like a complete idiot.

   “I can’t believe you’re actually considering throwing away the chance of a lifetime over some petty spat you two had.”

   “Petty spat?” I countered, offended. “That wanker made a total fool out of me last year, Aiko. People are still leaving comments on my photos about that show.”

   “First off, that show was iconic, and it had nothing to do with what happened between you two,” she stated, walking over to the other side of the kitchen and pulling open the fridge. “Secondly, you provoked him. I was there, San, I saw what happened.”

   I grunted under my breath, exhausted from trying to explain the truth to her or anyone else who hadn't been there minutes before it all kicked off.

   “I didn’t provoke him for no reason. But no matter what happened, he had no right to throw that shit at me.”

   “He only did what I would’ve done in his shoes.” Closing the fridge, Aiko was holding a pot of Greek yoghurt. She walked over to the cutlery drawer and grabbed a spoon. “You were a proper dickhead to him. I get that you were knackered and stressed out from the final show of the tour and all that, but that doesn’t change the fact that you were an absolute dickhead to him.”

   I took a deep breath, my stomach churning.

   “You’re supposed to be on my side, not his.”

   “I am on your side, which is why I’m telling you to sign the damn thing so we can go out and celebrate.”

   Shit…

   “I just…”

   I wanted to sign it so badly, but what if it all went pear-shaped? What if my sheer hatred for Alexei got the better of my professional skills? Pretending to be in love with him during filming was going to be dreadful.

   Aiko’s fingers brushed my shoulder once more as she handed me the pen.

   “Sign it, San,” she requested, her tone softening to a calm that made me shudder internally. “It’s only a few months, then you can cut him out of your life completely… Well, not completely, since you’ve still got the press tour and the premiere after filming, but once that’s done, you can pretend you kicked his British arse straight off the face of the planet.”

   I fought back a smile as I took the pen from her hand.

   Just a few months, San…

   “I swear, Aiko, if I survive this, I’m doubling your pay.”

   She grinned broadly.

   “Let’s just pray you two don’t turn a romance film into a UFC documentary.”

   I flipped open the folder containing the contract, skipping straight to the final page where a blank line sat right above my printed name.

   It was just a film production contract, but it felt like making a deal with the devil right in the middle of paradise.