Loaded with a total of 10 SPP and a whole lotta worry about re-imagining, I made my way back to the dormitory. Melvin’s tiny bowtie kept appearing in a sad, silent spotlight in my head the whole way back, whether I liked it or not.

“That might be my imagination as much as yours,” Mr. Narrator conceded.

“A lot like the bow in my hair, now ain’t it?” I replied aloud. “We need to talk to Madam Bovary. It’s as simple as that.”

I went to open the front door, but—

Creeeeeak!

It opened on its own before I could place my first knuckle rap. Beyond was that long hallway again, except now it was pitch-black beyond the threshold.

“Madam Bovary?” I questioned the darkness.

Silence.

Then two eyes appeared, dim at first but lighting up the longer I stared. They swelled larger and larger, bloodshot cracks forming along their curves, making their appearance all the more monstrous. Then small, grey lines uncurled one by one from below them, three to the left, and three to the right.

Whiskers!

“You’re just that cat,” I said with a sigh of relief. “Lurking in the shadows.”

“That cat?” the offended girl replied, still shrouded in darkness. “I’m Katey Kat.”

I put out my hand. “Is that so? Well, nice to finally meet ya—officially.”

She stepped into the light with a low purr. “Mmmmmmm,” she said slowly, as if she had all the time in the world to talk. “You don’t recognize my name, do you, Salamander?”

I pulled my rejected hand back and tilted my head coolly. “Should I?”

“Transfers...” she drawled, letting out an exasperated trill. “Here. Memorize my card. I won’t show it to you twice.”

A sharp snikt sound filled the air as she sliced her claws down on the diagonal in front of her. Her calling card appeared like lightning in the trailing slashes.

═════════✦✦✦═════════

NAME: Katey Kat

SPECIES: Kat with a K (Animated Variant)

RANK: 3 – Rising Star

TAGLINE: The Girl Who Keeps ‘Em Running!

═════════✦✦✦═════════

“Rising Star?” I read aloud.

That means she can eat all the catering she wants…

“Mmm-hmm,” she purred again smugly.

“That tagline though—does it mean what I think it means?”

“Keep it clean, kid.” Her voice dropped lower as she became testy. “I’m in the chase cartoons. You know. Kat chases mouse? Dog chases kat? I’m the kat in the middle, and there isn’t anyone better at that.”

I don’t know how, but the way she said “kat” made it feel like she was emphasizing that it started with a k instead of a c.

“Then what are you doing in this dorm?” I asked. “Shouldn’t you be able to afford your own place?”

You mind your own business, Salamander,” she snapped, her eyes narrowing.

“I was, ’til you appeared,” I asserted. “I’m just here to talk to Madam Bovary.”

“Well, she isn’t here to listen to you cry about strike two. So scram—”

“I didn’t get a strike two. I got paid. With a bonus, even!”

A startled hiss escaped her. “I don’t believe you.”

“Presto,” I said, flicking my fingers to summon my day job receipt. “Not that I have to prove myself to you, or anything.”

She gave me a calculating glance before turning her attention to the receipt. Then her voice softened, the purr creeping back in. “Not bad, transfer, not bad. Benson doesn’t usually give bonuses.”

“She knows your day boss,” Mr. Narrator remarked. “Interesting.”

I nodded to them both. “It was extenuating circumstances, I’m sure.”

“So back to Bovary,” Katey continued, a bit softer. “She’s not home. During most days, she’s out makin’ her rounds. She’ll be back tonight though.”

I frowned a little, starting to turn back to the door. “Alright. Thanks.”

She suddenly straightened. “Wait. You’re not going to blow it all in the city, are you? Make sure to put some aside for rent.”

“No, I was—city? What city?”

Katey blinked, then started to laugh. “Cel city! You really aren’t from around here, are you?”

“Oh… That sound’s familiar,” Mr. Narrator said absently.

Ya mean ya forgot a whole city?

“I think the term city is about three and a half sizes too big for it. Now where was it again…?”

“Directions, please?” I asked Katey.

“Just keep going down the lane out back,” she said, jerking her thumb over her shoulder. “Take the left split at the hollow tree.”

I should bring my bindle, shouldn’t I?

“It might be handy,” Mr. Narrator agreed. “You can carry all your mentionables and even then some.”

Maybe there’s a grocer, and I can finally get my bread and butter!

My stomach growled just as another card appeared between Katy and me.

═════════✦✦✦═════════

STATUS EFFECT ACQUIRED: THE GRUMBLIES

Description: Your stomach will grumble routinely, bringing down your mood.

Duration: Until resolved.

System Says: Again already?

═════════✦✦✦═════════

“Are you kidding me?!” I cried.

Katey’s whiskers twitched a bit playfully as her eyes narrowed. “I have some canned kat food—”

“No thank you,” I said firmly, trying not to retch at the thought.

The card flickered for a moment, and the letters ran around, transforming to create a new message.

═════════✦✦✦═════════

STATUS EFFECT RESOLVED

System Says: Lost your appetite quick, didn’t you?

═════════✦✦✦═════════

Katey then slapped me on the back with a merry little mewl. “You’re fun to play with. Maybe Madam was right. Make sure to check out the School of Hard Knocks while you’re in the city. I’m sure you've got a lot to learn. Oh, and if you see Patty—”

“Who’s Patty?”

Katey blinked. “The pig that sleeps next to you?”

“Oh. Yeah. She didn’t introduce herself, neither.”

The kat shook her head slowly. “Patty’s… shy. Nothin’ personal. In fact, now that you’re here…”

“Hmm?”

Then Katey shook her head. “Never mind. Don’t worry about it.”

What a crazy cat.

Mr. Narrator let out a soft sigh. “More like calculating,” he corrected. “Watch out for this one. I don’t think she’s on the up-and-up.”

“Whatever you say, Mr. Voice in my Head.”

“Narrator,” he corrected in a pained voice. “I’m Mr. Narrator. Your narrator!”

Except you haven’t been narrating, now have you? Just chewing the rag with me instead.

That brought him up short and silent real quick, so much so I felt a little guilty about it.

However, I had other fish to fry.

I squinted at Katey, who was trying to hold a pose of innocence for not quite answering me about Patty. “And what’s the lowdown on Shirley Squirrel and June Rabbit?”

Rather than dodge for a double, her entire face lit up. “Shirley and June scuffle, yeah?”

I nodded. “Seems to me they get on each other’s nerves.”

Another sharp pat landed on my shoulder. “A fellow connoisseur of chaos, I see!” Her purr deepened, as if she was as pleased as punch. “Okay, so Shirley—don’t ever mention her size. Short ain’t a term in her vocabulary—it’s a switch. And when you flip that switch, be prepared for a first-class riot!”

“And June cracks wise about it to egg her on?” I suggested.

“Along with making fun of her chitter,” she confirmed, her whiskers twitching.

“I don’t think I heard her chitter,” I replied, scratching the back of my head. “She sounded clear to me.”

“That’s because she spends all her points on elocution.” Katey’s look turned serious. “You might want to check out that class yourself.”

“I dunno what elocution even is,” I admitted.

“Yeah, and it shows, what with all the tough-mug talk.”

I guess I’m the frying fish now.

As I held back a retort, Katey continued. “And June, well, that whole thing is self-explanatory, now isn’t it?”

“It isn’t! All I know is she don’t like me a lick.”

Her voice dipped low as her whiskers fell. “You’re different, that’s all.”

“And what’s so wrong with that?”

“You’re more different than her, so you’re a good target. Distraction from her differences, you know?”

“Her differences?”

“She’s a Rabbit,” she said with a shrug, then noting I was being left behind at the station, she sighed. “From the Rabbit family? They’re practically royalty, Sally!”

“Then why is she here with us?”

Come to think of it, I still don’t know why you’re here, either.

“Her name. June!”

“Something’s wrong with June as a name?”

I did always think it belonged to the month first, but I myself had been called way worse.

“It’s all wrong. Why’d the System name her June? It doesn’t make sense. Patty Pig. Shirley Squirrel. Benson Beaver. But June? That makes her the black sheep of the Rabbit family.”

“The black sheep of the…” Then I stopped. “But that’s not that weird, right?”

She let out a long exhale. “Bad omen and all. So, she works three times as hard as most folk.”

“To get ahead?”

“No, to rig the race. And since she sees you as a threat, she’s gonna try to trip you up for sure.”

Then Katey nodded to herself, her grin spreading as far as her face would let it. “Yeah, this is gonna be quite entertaining, watching you two scrap too! But I want to see a fair fight. So first, enroll at the School of Hard Knocks. They’ll help you figure out where you should specialize. Tell ’em Katey sent ya. In fact... I changed my mind. Here, take my card.”

She summoned it with a snap of her fingers. “Show it to the Headmaster, okay? And ask for the Works.”

I eyed Katey suspiciously over the card. The returned gleam in her eyes spelled trouble. She lived for drama, and I was about to be her favorite show.

Then I considered what she had shared and determined it couldn’t hurt to be prepared for any potential adversaries.

And it's a school. What's the worst they could do, teach me something?

I took the card. “Alright. I’ll get the Works.”