Muddy Shoes

When Ho-jin lifted the bottle of honey water to his mouth, his hands were shaking so badly that the water ran down the side of his chin like a waterfall and soaked his T-shirt. "Fuck!"

He was furious. 

Ho-jin had told Ji-hun a thousand times to wait until his career was a little more secure before coming out. Ji-hun usually responded by making the next hint even harder to ignore. No woman he modeled with had ever been linked to him. Paparazzi caught him alone almost every time he went out at night. Then there was the host-bar past, which everyone already knew. People hardly needed anything else. 

"Who knows what the hell you're doing right now!" Ho-jin yelled to himself in the empty apartment.

Ji-hun sneezed at that exact moment.

The host had just finished shaking hands with his manager and turned to Ji-hun, holding his hand out. "Thank you, Ji-hun-ssi. That was an incredible show."

Ji-hun turned his back to check the message that had just come in on his phone. "Yeah, sure," he said, already walking away.

The host's hand stayed in the air.

Seo Won-hee, Ji-hun's manager, immediately caught it. "Thank you for having us."

Ji-hun put on his long trench coat and opened the message with obvious excitement.

Wha tthe fuck do you thik youre doing!

"Pfftt... Sunbae. You're so damn cute."

He knew his boyfriend well enough to know that calling him now, or even replying, would bring the whole building down.

Ji-hun fixed the collar of his coat, took a cotton pad from the makeup table, wet it, and wiped the makeup from around his eyes. Fucking stings.

Won-hee leaned in through the doorway. "Ji-hun-ah, let's go."

Ji-hun walked past him without answering and went outside. He was exhausted and sleepy. He also knew he probably would not get much sleep once he got home. His sunbae had every right to be angry with him, and Ji-hun knew that too.

When they reached the parking lot, he said without looking at Won-hee, "Should I find somewhere that's still open and bring him ice cream?"

"You seriously think ice cream is gonna work on him?" Won-hee said with a laugh. "He's gonna chew your ass out tonight, then come to the agency tomorrow and chew mine out."

"What the fuck are you laughing at?"

Won-hee swallowed. He was close enough to both of them to know that even when Ji-hun looked like he did not care about anything, Ho-jin mattered to him a lot, and he genuinely did not like making him angry or hurting him. "I'm not laughing, Ji-hun-ah," he said. "Trust me, all of us are already thinking about how we're gonna clean up the shit you pulled tomorrow."

Luckily, a few fans were causing chaos near the parking lot exit, and the subject suddenly changed to how they were supposed to get the car out.

Ji-hun lowered the back window halfway and started signing the photos the fans held out to him one by one. In his head, though, Ho-jin had found the muddy boots under the dining table and was picking them up while swearing.

That was probably a pretty optimistic thing to imagine.

I'm coming home

The second Ho-jin read the message, he went back and forth on whether to reply. He was still furious. He could not believe that ten minutes ago, in the middle of the night, he had been on the phone with the agency owner complaining about Ji-hun like he was reporting a kid to his teacher.

What the fuck am I supposed to do with this little bastard? That was the one question everyone in Ji-hun's life had asked themselves at some point.

But there were things only one person knew.

Ho-jin was the only one who knew Ji-hun still had terrible nightmares at night and sometimes woke up crying. Only Ho-jin knew that during sex, Ji-hun sometimes begged him to be good to him. Ho-jin knew he had not taken even one sip of coffee for a year because coffee reminded him of Tae-sung, or that even a glass breaking at home could leave him crying once he saw the pieces on the floor.

The one thing everyone knew was that Ho-jin was the only person who could keep Ji-hun under control. And that was exactly why production of Ji-hun's next high end brand campaign had been handed directly to Ho-jin.

Ji-hun did not know that yet.

Ho-jin had wanted to surprise him. Now he did not even know whether the campaign would still exist tomorrow because of what Ji-hun had done tonight.

Ji-hun, meanwhile, threw his phone onto the seat beside him and rested his head back. None of the things worrying Ho-jin were anywhere near his mind. All he wanted was to get home to him and lie against his chest. "Won-hee, what was on the schedule tomorrow?" he asked while watching the city lights pass outside.

"There's something new," Won-hee said. "Talk to Ho-jin sunbae when you get home."

I missed him so much.

—

"Ya, what was that?" Ho-jin said. His voice was not shaking or anything, but he was still obviously angry.

I really fucked up this time.

"Ji-hun? Why did you say that?"

"It just came out, sunbae," Ji-hun said as he walked toward him quickly without even taking off his shoes. The moment he grabbed Ho-jin by the neck, pulled him in, and kissed him, he finally felt calm. "Let's fuck, okay? You can be mad at me after."

"W—what? In your dreams!"

"Sunbae, please... just a little," Ji-hun said, burying his face in Ho-jin's neck. He actually had dreamed about them having sex. By the time he woke up that morning, Ho-jin had already left the house, and Ji-hun spent the whole day walking around like a horny bull with Ho-jin stuck in his head. He could not focus in class, and even his sexting attempt had failed because Ho-jin had been too busy to answer properly.

"I need to tell you something," Ho-jin said, then closed his eyes. He was already hard from Ji-hun kissing him, and he knew perfectly well they were going to have sex anyway. Ji-hun had turned into that out-of-control teenager again, the one being run completely by his dick and who would only go back to normal once he came inside Ho-jin. "Fuck me now, but just know I'm gonna fuck you up really badly after this, Moon Ji-hun," Ho-jin said with a moan.

Ji-hun had shaved right before the show, and his face moved smoothly against Ho-jin's neck. While Ho-jin pulled off Ji-hun's trench coat, Ji-hun kicked off his shoes and sent them flying. When they got to their shirts, they helped each other, and by the time they finally collapsed onto the couch, Ji-hun had Ho-jin in his mouth.

At that point, Ho-jin remembered nothing about what had happened before or the news he was supposed to give him afterward.

"Fuck, sunbae, I missed you..." Ji-hun said, pulling his head back to look at him. "Please don't be mad at me. I only did it to be a little shit. I didn't even think you'd get this angry."

Right then, Ho-jin wanted to tell him to shut up and get back to work.

He never had.

His biggest fear in life was making Ji-hun remember his past while they were having sex.

Then his eyes suddenly landed under the table. "Ji-hun... what the fuck are those shoes doing there?" he said. "Man, are those muddy too?"

"Pfft... close your eyes," Ji-hun said, chuckling. "You're gonna come in my mouth."