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Royal Punch BOOK 1

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Oct 10, 2026

It had been a week and a half.

Dimi carried a bucket to the kitchen. She went to Ivan if she should boil eggs right away, but she saw that he had a customer.

It was the old satyr Sunmut who wanted to sell a tea kettle. Ivan needed metal of different sorts for his work, so he usually bought what people brought him of old objects or scrap metal.

“I can’t use this tea kettle anymore after we found out that these can be poisonous.” The old sheep-man's hands were shaking as he adjusted his glasses. “Maybe you could use the metal for something?”

Ivan placed the kettle on a weight. “Two pounds of copper. I will pay you fifty coronets.”

The old sheep-man took the money from Ivan and smiled gratefully as he slowly walked out.

“Fifty coronets for two pounds of copper?” Dimi asked once Sunmut was gone. “I thought you only gave sixteen coronets per pound.”

“Normally. But I’ve been told that old Sunmut can’t work anymore because of his poor eyesight. And Sunmut has always been nice to me, so I give him a little extra when I can get away with it.“

Dimi was confused. “I don’t get it, why not just give him money instead?“

“He wouldn’t accept that. He is too proud. So I let him leave with his dignity intact.“ Ivan sighed. He looked at Dimi. “Go clean up the floor in the house. The mayor is coming over to get a bad tooth pulled out.“

“But it’s almost time for lunch.“

“Well, then hurry up or we might have to skip lunch.“

Dimi gave him an annoyed glare and then left.

Good. Ivan thought for himself as he prepared to melt the kettle. She is starting to crack. Pretty soon, she will react poorly and I will have an excuse to discipline her and she will beg me to stop “training” her.

Did Ivan feel bad about manipulating the child? Sure. But humans were not meant for fist-fighting.

***

It had been two weeks now.

Dimi sweated as she carried two buckets of water into Ivan’s workshop. She placed the buckets next to the door.

She took off her gloves to take a quick glance at her hands. They were not delicate anymore. They looked like a worker’s hands.

At least her arms weren’t as tired as they used to be from getting water from the well.

“Thanks.“ Ivan took a break from hammering on the anvil and stretched his arms. “While you are here, take that box with nails and put it on the kitchen table. We are gonna eat lunch once I’m done and then I will deliver the nails to the griffin farm.“ Ivan pointed towards a medium-sized wooden box filled with nails. Dimi did as she was told and Ivan kept hammering on the head of a scythe.

But he was almost about to hit his own hand as he heard a crash. He turned around and saw that Dimi had dropped the box. There were nails all over the floor.

“It was an accident…“ The princess looked very embarrassed.

“What the devil are you doing?!“ Ivan raised his voice. “Don’t just throw them around, they aren’t toys!“

“I’m sorry.“ Dimi looked at her feet.

“Alright, I’M going to the kitchen to eat lunch. YOU are going to stay here and pick up all of the nails before you get something to eat. There are 150 in total.“

“What, alone? That’s not fair.“

“Quit complaining and get to it, Dimi.“

“IT’S NOT FAIR!“ Dimi kicked some of the nails. “I didn’t mean to do it! I said I was sorry!“

“Your mess, not mine. Now, CLEAN IT UP, YOUNG LADY!“

Dimi gave the bull-man an angry glare. “Stop bossing me around all the time! You, you… you can’t tell me what to do, I’m a princess! I’m gonna… I will have you thrown into the dungeon, you… you… you DUMB COW-MAN!”

“Oh, is that so?“ Ivan laughed sarcastically as he crossed his arms. He thought for himself that now was the moment he had been waiting for. “Well, guess what? Right now, you are in my house, your highness. And as long as I’m king of this humble castle, you will-“

“YOU ARE NOT MY DAD!!!“

Ivan didn’t say anything. He looked surprised at the furious little human girl. Ivan wanted her to get mad and snap at him, but… well, she looked at him as if she hoped her intensively hateful glare would somehow set him on fire. She bit her lower lip while scowling as a single little tear fell from her left eye.

"What?" Ivan blinked. “Dimi, I didn’t say I was your-”

“I HATE YOU!“ Dimi clenched her fists.

“Oh…” The giant minotaur was actually taken aback by this declaration. “Ah, well, that’s not good. Wait, I mean-“

“I’M GOING TO MY ROOM!“ Dimi yelled as she stormed out. “OUCH!!” She had stepped on one of the nails.

Ivan watched the tiny human leave as he realized this was the first time he had seen her cry.

“Dammit, Ivan…” The minotaur nudged his forehead as he recalled a bad childhood memory. “You really ARE a dumb cow-man.“

***

Dimi kicked one of the walls in her little room. She kept kicking it even though she had hurt her big toe and chipped a toenail. And she screamed like an angry little animal.

Someone knocked on the door.

“Dimi?“ It was Ivan’s voice. “Can I come in?“

“NO!“ Dimi sat on her bed, steaming with anger.

“Okay.“ Ivan said. “I will just stay outside then. But can I say something?“

Dimi didn’t answer.

“Dimi, you know I’m not trying to replace your dad, right?“

Dimi still didn’t answer.

“Well, I’m not.“ Ivan coughed awkwardly. “And… ah… I just wanna say that I pushed you too hard. I’m not used to having a little kid around. So… Well, sorry about that.“

Dimi looked at the door. Then she looked at her feet. “I’m sorry that I said that I hate you. And I’m sorry that I dropped the nails.”

“Eh, it’s not the end of the world.“ Ivan hesitated. “Can I… can I come in now?“

“Yeah…“ Dimi kept looking at her feet as Ivan entered her room. The big bull-man sat on the bed next to her, making the bed creak.

Then they didn’t say anything for a while.

“Sooo…“ Ivan tried to break the silence. “Am I still going to jail?“ He made a lifeless laugh at his own joke.

Dimi bit her lower lip. “I’m sorry I said that.”

“It’s okay.“

Ivan sighed.

Dimi said nothing.

“You know…“ Ivan coughed again. “When I was around your age… My grandpa got sick. Very, VERY sick. So sick we had to send him away to get treated.“

Dimi finally looked at him. “Did he die?”

“What? No. No, he got better and became a very old man. But… Well, I was scared. I was a little kid and I didn’t want him to die and I wanted him to come home. I was scared and angry, and well… sad. I wanted to cry. But I didn’t.“

Dimi still looked at him. Ivan was sure she gave him her full attention.

“I didn’t cry for a month.“ Ivan went on. “And instead, I felt… bad. My stomach began to hurt. And I got angry at my mom and dad and I yelled at them all the time, all because I thought it wasn’t okay to cry.“

“Why didn’t you?“ Dimi asked.

“Well… I thought I wasn’t allowed to. My dad once told me that big boys don’t cry because… well, it’s a stupid man-thing, it doesn’t matter. But not crying was bad for me. Crying is a good thing to do if you are sad over something. You know, like you are sad over your dad not being here. So… you know… You should cry. If, ah... if you want to.“

Dimi didn’t say anything. Then, she began to sniff. And slowly, tears fell from both of her eyes. “I thought maybe you would kick me out.”

Ivan was a bit startled. “Dimi?”

“I just wanna cry all the time. But I was… I was…“ Dimi gasped after air. “I was scared that… that if I cried all the time, then… then you would kick me out.“

“Wh… WHAT?!“ Ivan stared at the little child with disbelief in his eyes.

“I was…“ Dimi gasped after air as she dried her nose that had begun to run. “I was so sure you would think I was annoying if I cried all the time. And then… then you would kick me out and… and… and-“

“No. NO! I wouldn’t.“ Ivan slowly stroked her hair, not sure what else to do. “Cry as much as you like.“

Dimi sniffed and before-oppressed tears ran from her eyes. Then, she began to wail and Dimi buried her face in Ivan’s dirty shirt. She hadn’t been hugged or hugged anyone for weeks, and she needed to hug someone who was bigger than her. Ivan so happened to be there and he was enormous, even for an adult.

Ivan looked at the little girl who now hugged him for comfort. He was scared out of his mind.

So he just let her keep crying as he carefully patted her head, not sure what else to do. Ivan considered if he should say that it was gonna be okay, but he was honestly not sure it was.

She eventually stopped crying. Her eyes were red, her cheeks wet, and she had gotten hiccups.

They just sat on the bed, not saying anything as Dimi calmed down.

“I will go and pick up the nails from the floor now.“ She sighed.

“We better do it together, or it will take all day.“ Ivan patted her on the head again. He felt comfortable about it now. “Then we will eat. Then we deliver the nails to Aura’s farm. And THEN I will show you how to throw a proper punch.“

Dimi looked at Ivan as she sniffed. “Re… Really?”

“Sure.“ The bull-man smiled awkwardly. “I think it is about time I teach you how to fight. I better get you a pair of boxing gloves in your size as well one of these days.“

It was the first time the little princess had given him a genuine smile. But then the smile disappeared and she buried her face in Ivan’s shirt once more and wailed.

Ivan kept patting the girl's head, feeling like he had bit off more than he could chew.

jowaezi
jowaezi

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Dimicatio is the ten-year-old human princess who must flee to the countryside after the orcs have succeeded in conquering her kingdom. But there is a way for her to get the crown that is rightfully hers:
Trial by combat.
"Royal Punch" follows the adventures of Dimi and her godfather Ivan the Minotaur as Dimi trains to become a boxer, grows up working in Ivan's forge and experience the ups and downs of "princess puberty."
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12 episodes

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

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