TW: Suicidal Idiation, Attempted Suicide and Self-Harm, please take care and read at your own discretion

Days began to blur together. Kanato’s eyes were half open as he mindlessly read the textbooks laid out before him. He wasn’t really sure what day it was or how long he’d been cooped up in his room. Paranoia ate at him constantly. He was never sure when his mother would come in to check up on him. Whenever she would, his progress was never good enough for him which led to fresh bruises appearing on his body.

Kanato wasn’t allowed to go to school until he finished the mountain of textbooks she gave him and his wounds healed. His bruises were in places that were too noticeable and his mother didn’t want to run the risk of getting caught.

With the way things were progressing his thoughts were getting dark. He was so sick of it all. His dreams were being crushed right in front of his eyes.

He just wanted to escape it all. The only way he could think of doing it would be to remove himself from the equation. It terrified him but he couldn’t see any other way out and he was so sick of it all.

The only thing that made him hesitate was not being able to see Satoru or Hiroto again. He didn’t want to say goodbye to them or unnecessarily cut their time short but this would be his only solution for freedom.

Kanato knew that he was being selfish but he didn’t know of anything else to do.

It was a rash and impulsive decision. While his mom was out he managed to unlock his door and searched for his phone so that he could send his goodbyes to Satoru and Hiroto. The only other thing he would take would be a box cutter.

He shoved those things into his pockets and started running. He didn’t know where he was going nor did he care.

Kanato cried as he ran. He felt like he was trapped in a long, dark, maze. No matter which way he ran there was no way out. However when he did find some light it was unreachable. There was a cliff that dropped straight down. The light was so tempting. So this would be the day he would take that jump. He was so sick of the darkness.

He eventually wound up at the sea. It was cold and the crashing of the waves were deafening. In front of him lies the black abyss. Soon it would all be over. As terrifying as that sounded, it gave him a strange sense of relief.

He pulled out his phone and quickly wrote a goodbye message to both Satoru and Hiroto. There was so much he wanted to say but he decided not to. After all, what would it mean in the end?

Kanato hit send and threw his phone down on the beach before pulling out the box cutter. He slowly dug the blade into his wrist sliding down to reveal the bright red flesh and blood below. Kanato repeated the process on the other wrist then ran towards the ocean. 

His hands around his neck in an attempt to expedite the process. Kanato just wanted everything to be quick and painless.

He tossed himself under the water until panic set in and his lungs burned. Kanato breached the surface, gasping for air but despite all of his survival instincts that told him not to, he threw himself back under. Kanato repeated this process countless times. In the end it wasn’t working and he was exhausted. So he carried himself back to shore. 

The closer he got he could hear his phone ringing. It was the person who meant the most to him: Satoru.