"Oh crap! Would you keep still? Sit on your bike properly!” I carried on sketching on my A3 piece of paper. Evan kept rising on his toes to look at my drawing, but I lifted it to my chest so he couldn’t see. He looked ravishing today; he made my cheeks heat up every time our eyes made contact. Evan hovered slightly over his bike as he leant it to one side. The tracks in the background gave it more of a good feeling. He also had his helmet under his right arm as he posed for me.

“Stop telling me what to do,” he said. He rolled his eyes acting childish.

“Err; remember you are the one who proposed this idea,” I reminded him.

“Yes, after you made me beg on my knees.”

“Maybe I should’ve painted that instead.”

“I bet you would have loved that.”

“I’d hang it on my bedroom wall, framed.”

When I finally finished the sketch I planned to transfer it onto my canvas for me to paint. I glanced at the finished sketch. Evan’s face looked so handsome. I think he may have spent most of his effort doing his hair today.

“After, do you want to go for a ride on my bike?” he asked. I started to do some touch-ups on the sketch. I wasn’t ignoring Evan, but I wanted to focus on finishing the small details.

“Ride?” Fast vehicles weren’t my favourite thing but they are also dangerous it makes me feel sick remembering how fast rollercoasters are which are similar. My ex-boyfriend took me on one before and I came off, hurling all over the place. He was disgusted. I made a mental note never to ride on anything fast again – but with Evan it might be different.

“Yeah, with you too,” he replied. I stopped sketching and looked at him. 

“I’m not good with fast rides. I throw up.”

He chuckled and shrugged.

“Don’t worry; it’s a different feeling to roller coasters.” He convinced me, giving me puppy eyes. I gazed up into his striking green eyes, biting my lower lip, thinking that I might regret this decision.

After a while, I finished the touch-ups of my picture. It looked perfect and I was happy with it. Evan had gone inside to change back into his clothes so I quickly packed away my things. I placed my sketch into a plastic wallet so it wouldn’t get ruined, again. In my hands, I glanced at the drawing one last time with a smile on my face. It was taken from my hands and I looked round almost in a panic only to see Evan putting it into his locker. A small piece of paper fell out and landed just in front of my feet. I bent down to pick it up and glanced at it.

A bucket list?

Evan snatched it from my hands shoving it back into his locker. He then grabbed a spare helmet which he handed to me.

“Plans for the future?”

“Of course, who doesn’t have a bucket list these days.” he said, shutting his locker and turning to face me.

“I don’t have one.”

“Oh really, maybe you should write one.”

“But it’s cute, I like it.”

“What’s so cute about having a bucket list?” He put his hand out for me to grab, which I did, and then he walked me out to his bike. I could feel the blood starting to boil in my body as we approached the bike. He took the helmet from my hands. He tucked a bit of loose hair behind my ear, before placing the helmet over my head.

“Is this a good idea? I mean having me on the back of your bike?”

“Think of it as being free.”

“Ha.”

He hopped onto his bike and extended a hand to help me on behind him. I snaked my arms around his waist as he started the engine.

“You might want to hold tighter than that,” he said. I felt the vibrations from his chest as he chuckled. I squeezed my arms around him and held on tighter as the bike started to roar. The bike jolted forward, startling me. I wasn’t going to like this. The motor bike was loud and my stomach turned as we set off down the road.

I gripped onto him tightly, digging my nails into his skin. I could hear him grunt. I want to get off, I want to get off. Maybe if I close my eyes it will be better. Or maybe not.

How the hell was this frigging different from a roller coaster ride? It’s worse. Evan was dodging past cars as we sped down the road. I squeezed my eyes shut and ignored the heavy feeling in my stomach; my legs tightened more from the fear.

◎

We finally came to a stop after shouting to him that I wanted to get off. I jumped off the back immediately, almost stumbling over my own feet. My head was whirling around as I tried to get my helmet off. I failed miserably. My stomach currently felt like a washing machine, spinning around, the nausea almost taking over.

He pulled off his helmet and hopped off of his bike. He stepped towards me to give me a hand with removing my helmet.

“You have a tight grip.” He pulled the helmet over my head gently and my hair bounced down over my shoulders. Evan’s eyes met mine.

“Well, I did say I don’t like fast things,” he pulled his top up to wipe the sweat from his face, which caught me off guard. My eyes started to examine his beautiful body. I couldn’t peel them away from his model-like figure. My body started to run hot, making me desire him. I saw the scratch marks on his chest from when I gripped him and I pressed over them with my fingertips gently touching his chest. His warm hand came up and covered mine. I glanced up at him, feeling his breath fan across my face. The sudden touch startled me and I whipped my hand away.

“How did you do that?” I asked, playing dumb.

“They are what you did to me,” he replied, laughing as he pulled his top-down. I gave him a look of disappointment. “Come on,” he put his hand out for me to grab, which I did.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“I’m hungry. We are going to a nearby café. It’s on me.”

It was a small shack almost in the middle of nowhere. There was a flashing red ‘Smiths’ sign above the door. We were seated and our food arrived quicker than expected. I glanced around noticing that the place was empty.

“How did you find this place?”

“My dad used to take me on his bike and we would come here.” He smiled, as if he was remembering something fun.

“How long have you been riding the bike for?” I looked over to him as he was munching down on his beef burger.

“About two years.” I saw a flash of hurt in his eyes

“What happened to your mother?” I asked. He suddenly looked up at me and his cold eyes felt like they shot straight through me.

“She’s a hooker,” he replied bluntly. I sat in silence not knowing what else to say. Evan glanced over to me and I shifted in my seat under his gaze but I didn’t dare look at him. Maybe I should have never mentioned it; but he noticed my anxiousness. It made me nervous.

“Don’t worry. I didn’t really know my mum that’s all I know about her, she was once a hooker,” he replied as he threw a few chips into his mouth and then began slurping his drink. I looked down at my food thinking about changing the subject. My hands clasped together under the table. I want to touch his hand, show him I’m here. He will talk to me in his own time and this is something his girlfriend should be comforting him on.

“So, that bucket list? What was written on there?”

“Oh, you know this and that.”

“Tell me, I want to know you more.”

“Don’t laugh at me though,”

“I won’t, I promise.” Evan leaned over the table, preparing to tell me what was on his list. It would give me an idea what things he was into and what he wanted his future to look like. The things you want to do most before you die.

“I want to have a family and children. Maybe swim with dolphins and horse riding in the country, that kind of stuff.”

“So you have plans to settle down with a family, who knew?”

“I want a family,”

There was a long pause between us both. I didn’t know what else to ask him. He wanted a family, but why did he act the way he did? Why was he even telling me this, wasn’t it private?

“Why do you act different with me now? You were such a dick towards me when we first met. So what changed?” I asked. His stare was burning into my face and I shifted in my chair once again. I didn’t dare look up, although I was keen to see the look on his face. I focused myself on poking my food with my fork.

“You seemed different from other people I know. I kind of like that.” My head shot up and watched his lips as he spoke to me. My heart lifted to his response. “You’re really good to talk to.” He shrugged, giving me a polite smile.

“What did you think of me when you first saw me?” he suddenly asked me. My eyes shot up, connecting with his. I couldn’t tell him what my real thoughts were. I knew of him before we were formally introduced, but that would be embarrassing to mention. How could I say ‘I’ve always watched you on my bus every time you were on it? I watched your kindness to other people and to top it off, your good looks were so remarkable. You had me hooked no matter how bad your personality was.’ That was a big no-no.

“Well, honestly, I thought you were an asshole, but, there was just something about you that pulled me in. There’s a story behind yours eyes,” I said. His eyes moved to my lips as I spoke.

“What pulled you in?” Evan tilted his head slightly as he waited for an answer. I could see the curiosity in his eyes.

“Well, I find you careless and it interests me, why?” I replied. He looked away from me.

“I like you!” he murmured. My eyes flickered to him as I thought I might have misheard him. He then moved his eyes to me and his cheeks turned slightly pink. Oh my, he’s blushing. Evan Wood just blushed. Or am I dreaming this? I didn’t know exactly what he meant by ‘I like you’. It could mean he liked me as a friend. Or he could like me as a woman. Or he liked my sex appeal. I snorted in my head at the last statement. What sex appeal?

I looked away from him but my eyes slowly made their way back to him. I couldn’t stop looking at his handsome face. The butterflies in my stomach felt like they just had babies.

“Meet me again tomorrow.” He rushed his words.

A smile slowly crept upon my lips and I nodded. He then reached out, lightly touching my cheek. I felt the burn beneath his touch. I could feel tingles on my cheek when he moved his hand away. My heart was loud in my chest; Evan could probably hear it – though I hoped he couldn’t. I feel that he needs me to take care of him. His father was dead and his mother was not around, I wasn’t sure if he has any siblings. But I knew I wanted to be there for him.

We finally finished eating at the café and Evan put his bike back into the garage at the racetracks. We both made our way to the bus stop, in a comfortable silence. We both sat down on the bench together. The bus eventually arrived and we both got onboard; I felt comfortable being with him. We sat down towards the back, Evan glanced at me a couple of times.

“Have you ever had a serious relationship?” I blurted out. Curiosity got the better of me again. He didn’t hesitate to answer, though.

“No, I’ve never had a serious relationship before.” I was shocked by his honesty. I didn’t think he would answer that; though he could be lying; but what will he gain from it?

“Have you?”

I nodded.

“Just one.”

But I guess it wasn’t serious as it didn’t last very long, well to him it wasn’t.

“Was it anyone from College?”

“Nope, it was a long time ago.”

“How did it end?”

I didn’t reply straight away. Evan was suddenly curious about my past relationship. Although it did end badly, is it something I want to talk about with Evan?

“It just ended badly.” I finally said. He took that as an answer and didn’t ask me anything else. It wasn’t because I was still heartbroken; he just wasn’t worth my time talking about.

We finally came to Evan’s stop; though it felt like time flew by.

He got up from his seat and shuffled past me. He stopped and bent down to kiss my cheek. My hand rushed up to touch my cheek where his lips were – it was the first time he didn’t make a pass at me. I looked up to see him smiling. It made me melt when I saw how wide it was. The tingles were still on my cheek after he left. I gently brushed my fingers over the spot where he had placed his lips. I turned round to wave as the bus started moving off.

Evan, I like you very much. I want you. Is that selfish of me?