I cried so hard. The look of my own hand.... it horrified me. To make things worse, other people, that weren't part of my family, had seen it as well. I sobbed even harder. Each tear had represented my fear, sadness and anger. I wanted to give Richard the chance to live once more. I want to get my body back. I don't want my eyes to have different colors. I hate everything about myself, from my red hair to my robotic legs. I curled myself up into a ball. No one could save me from my own sadness. I remember how everything played out after the incident.
Friday January 3rd, 2017
It had been a week since the 'accident'. We had already prepared the funeral for Richard. I was still in the hospital. I refused to speak to anyone. I didn't think I even deserved to face them. I felt so hopeless. All that ran through my head was:
It was all your fault. You should have died, not him. He was an innocent civilian.
Richard, or Richy, was the youngest servant of them all. He was 26 years old and had a family to take care of. Both his parents had died and he had to take care of his little brother who was adopted and his pet dog, Lucky. One day, Clovis had found him on the cold streets, trying to shelter his younger sibling,Adam, in his arms. Clovis took pity upon the 3 and decided to take them in. My parents had let him stay and treated him like their own son. I was 6 at the time and he was 17. His brother was same age as me but a few days earlier.
At first, I despised them. I didn't like how mother and father let strangers into the house. Especially when they came from the streets, but later on I grew closer and closer to all of them. Clovis had taught him how to drive and gave him educational classes on courses he missed because he was a drop out. He went to Harvard and passed with flying colors. His brother was home schooled as well until he decided he wanted to attend my private school. To pay for their gratitude, Richard had decided to become my driver to pick Adam and I from and to school.
With them included, it was like one big happy family.... Until that day....
Thursday March 22nd, 2017
Adam didn't go to school that day. He was dealing with a high fever. That day, Richard and I had a huge plan for Richard. We were going to bake him cookies and other sweets. Then we would play some games. It would be like a mini party just for us. I hopped into the car and we sped off. We were passing by a local beach when all of a sudden, I heard a fast but faint beeping noise. "Richard, what's that sou--" I was cut off by an explosion. People started screaming in the background and running for safety. I woke up with a huge aching pain in my arm and legs. I looked down to see that blood was spilling from where they used to be. I screamed. I looked around desperately for help. All of a sudden, I saw a body with blood spilling from it. "Richard! I yelled. I manged to crawl over to him and put him on what was ever left of me. "Richard! Answer me!" I sobbed. He slowly opened his eyes and gave me a small smile. His face was pale and his hands felt cold. "I'm so..... sorry, Jamie." He muttered.
"No... No! Don't be sorry! This isn't your fault!" I exclaimed. "It is my fault. I'm the one making you cry. I'm sorry I had to go like this. I was kinda hoping I would be able to repay your family and then one day, Adam, Lucky and I would walk in the sunset saying that we would see each other again one day." He chuckled. "Guess that will never happen." My tears fell onto his face. "Don't go. Please." I begged. "Tell Adam and the others that I am sorry." Richard closed his eyes ad blood dripped out of his mouth. His chest had stopped moving and he was still. I screamed and cried. Rain poured down on me, making my exposed injuries sting. Ambulances and police swarmed around us. I couldn't stop crying. 3 men took me into the ambulance and they left Richard's lifeless body at the crime scene.
Saturday March 25th, 2017
It had been 3 days since the incident and I was lying in a hospital bed, crying my eyes out. Someone knocked on my door. I wiped my eyes. "Come in." Mother said. A police man came in. "Officer." She nodded her head. "What is it?" The man took off his hat."I know this hard enough but I have some terrible news." He informed. Mother looked at me and I nodded my head, signaling that it was fine. "Alright then. Tell us." Mother said. The man pursed his lips. "The explosion was no accident. Someone had planted a bomb underneath the car. We believe that they were targeting your daughter." My eyes widened. Richard had died because of me??? I couldn't help it. I cried even more. I was supposed to die, not Richard!
Present Time
I wiped my tears. Adam was going through the same phase I was so I decided to pay him a visit for the first time in 3 years. I walked to his room and opened his door. Adam was silent and was staring at me. Ever since the loss of his brother, he had stopped talking. I sat down next to him and put my head on his shoulder. I couldn't help but cry. "I'm sorry. If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be suffering. If it weren't for me, Richard would still be alive. Its all my fault!" He cried as well. A wave of guilt washed over me. "Don't cry. He's in a better place now." He said between breathes. "Its all my fault." I muttered again. "I am to blame. All my fault."
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