Hiro asks me to stay behind in class until all the wards have left.
He takes a seat next to me and crosses his legs. “I was given some rather bad news today” he begins. “I’m going to be reassigned to a different facility." He breathes deep and grips his knee. "It wasn't my choice, but they're sending me to Krung Thep regardless. I’ve requested that you and my other top wards be moved with me, but the request has been denied.”
I feel sick, like a pound of rotten food is sitting in my stomach.
“It won’t go into effect until after the next auction, but we have to start preparing now. I have your reserve as high as can be set for your level, but it’s not going to be enough to hold you through future auctions. We’ve got to raise your value, or you’ll be sold in your seventh year. I’m not okay with that.”
My hands are clenched tightly around each other, sweat building between.
“Are you listening, West?”
“Yeah,” I say while staring hard at the ground. I start counting the scuffs on my shoes, then the scuffs on the floor.
“You’re the top ward in my class, but you’re only leveling average marks in your others. You’ve got to get those marks raised before I’m reassigned.”
While my counting loops, the reality of this place sinks deeper into me, biting through my skin and my muscles, piercing my bones. There are no heroes, even if they want to be. There is no escape, even if we dream it. There’s just barbed fences and water. Cold, raging water.
“I’ll try harder,” I say. “I’m sorry.”
He puts his hand on my shoulder. “There’s nothing to be sorry about. You’re a good kid and you will make it to a high bid. I’m just preparing you for what might be coming.”
What might be coming is a guardian more like Jael’s. A guardian who picks a few favorite stars among his wards--usually the better looking ones--and polishes those. The rest of us will serve as the pedestal for their display.
He hands me a late pass. I pause at the door. “I’m going to miss you,” I say in Japanese, then exit before he can respond.
I don’t go to class. I go to the bathroom, lock myself in the stall and pray. I don’t know who to pray to or how to do it, but right now, I need something. So please, someone, something, anything. Please. Help. Me.
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