“Breath in Chica. Now hold it. Good. And let it out slowly. Excellent. That’s my girl.”
Casey watched as Jules coached Bean through another contraction. His feet felt rooted to the ground and he could feel the sweat drip between his shoulderblades. Not all of it was due to his run back to camp from shelter two. He hadn’t felt this scared since basic, or when they handed him his promotion pins and gave him a full squad to run.
When she finished exhaling, Jules asked, “Is that one past?”
He could see Bean’s lips move and could almost hear her soft “Yes.” in reply.
Casey studied the girl while he counted his breath. Each breath in and out marked by his thumb as it moved up along his finger. At the tip, he started back down. By the time he reached his pinky, two minutes passed. It was a great way to keep track of time without losing his concentration. Casey heard her whimper.
“Another one is starting,” Jules told her. Bean shook her head no, but Jules argued, “I can feel it building under my hand Chica.” Jules looked up and around, and growled, “Where the hell is Case?”
The irritated plea for his presence almost elicited a reaction from him. He told himself he waited because he wanted to see how far apart the contractions were, and not because of his fear. His fear ignored him.
Bean made it to just over three minutes when Jules finally needed to coach her through another contraction with a deep breath. Her knuckles showed white where her fingers clasped Jules’s arm.
“Dammit, Case. Where are you?” Jules questioned the air again.
Before Casey could step from the shadows a hand clasped his shoulder.
Casey tensed at the touch but suppressed his instinct to strike. “Dangerous move, Tristan,” he told the soldier behind him. “Weren’t you beat enough for one day?” His question was rewarded with a chuckle from the man behind him.
“Ethan barely touched me. And the punches he did land, I let him take.” Tristan let go of his shoulder and stepped next to him, and surveyed the scene. After a minute, Tristan asked, “You know, I know about as much about this as you do, right?”
“Yes.”
“Then why did you request my assistance?” Tristan queried. He truly sounded curious.
“Because you give a shit,” Casey replied.
Tristan snorted. “Anyone with a brain would.”
Casey’s split camp disagreed with that point. “Out of everyone on this squad, you and Jules have been most understanding and supportive of Bean. I’m going to need help, and… well,” Casey trailed off.
“You think Momma won’t flip out at our presence.”
Basically. Casey tilted his head, indicating Jules, who was cuddling Bean in the river. “A week ago, do you think she would have done that?”
“Maybe,” Tristan replied. “No, probably not,” he amended. “Never saw such a scared rabbit with a spine of steel. If you think about it, she’s pretty amazing. Living on her own, in the wilderness. Not to mention pregnant.” Casey watched him shake his head. “She had to have planned for a long time and escaped right before the medics confirm her pregnancy. There’s no way she would have made it out of the labs otherwise.”
“You think this is her first?”
“Undoubtedly,” Tristan answered. “If it was her second she would have needed help escaping. The scientists don’t let anyone out of the labs if they’ve conceived before. This is her first. Guaranteed.”
A flash of relief and some of the tension drained from his shoulders. If this was her first, then she wouldn’t be able to compare what he did to the city’s medical professionals.
Tristan continued, “I feel a bit sorry for her, though. And I wonder if she would have run, had she known she was pregnant.”
“Why?”
“In the labs they keep them sedated—heavily—for the procedure.” Tristan shook his head. “She feels each and every step of this process. Even the drugged up women would cry during the labor and delivery.” He turned to Casey. “Be prepared for a lot of screaming. Your balls are going to retreat in sympathy.”
Casey kept his expression neutral. “Explain.”
“Think about it. If they cried, whimpered, and occasionally screamed while high on the pain meds the surgeons’ still have access too, how bad is she—” Tristan said with a wave of his hand toward Bean “—going to scream and cry without a damn thing to soften the blow? Just hearing them in the labs made my nuts run for cover.”
Casey snorted, both doubtful and bemused at the image Tristan conjured. “How long were you there again? In FAP?”
“Two years,” Tristan replied. “Enough to know that what I say about her pain is true.”
Casey’s amusement died. This is going to suck, he thought and then shrugged. “It cannot be prevented at this point.”
“True.”
They turned at the sound of shifting gravel behind them. Jaesen turned the corner of the path. His arms full of supplies Casey requested. Both Tristan and Casey stepped forward and took the gear from Jaesen’s hands.
“Thank you,” Casey said.
“Can you set up a pit while I go get coals from the cooking fire?” Jaesen requested.
“Yes. We will take care of that,” Casey replied. He squared his shoulders, and took a deep breath, before letting it out slowly. It was time to reveal his presence.
But Tristan stopped him. His voice holding an edge of amusement. “You’re scared shitless.”
“Damn right. I’m not a medic.” The admission made his stomach churn. He didn’t like to admit his weakness. “I wasn’t trained for this.”
“Yet you’re going to do it?”
“I can’t let her do this alone,” Casey snapped.
“Well you could, but it’d be damn cowardly of you. Enough cowards in the squad right now as it is.”
Casey huffed and took a step forward. He put the kit and the clothes on the ground while Tristan did the same with the blankets. “Will you start a fire ring and collect some deadfall?” he asked as he removed his shirt and his gun holster. He put it next to the pile of dry clothes. “I’m going to rinse off really quick before relieving Jules.”
“He already knows you are here. Looks like Momma does too. She is watching you and has a death grip on Jules' arm. I think he’s wincing.”
“Am I that scary?”
Tristan snorted. “Yep, pup, you make me want to run for safety.”
Casey shook his head. “You’re so full of shit.”
The statement earned a laugh from Tristan.
“Go. I am going to need that fire. And when Jaesen gets back, ask him to bring Bean’s bedroll. I don’t think these blankets are going to be enough to soften the ground.” Casey looked around him. “Ask him to bring mine also. Just in case.”
“Will do,” Tristan replied.
With a sigh, Casey turned and walked to the edge of the river. The look of relief on Jules’s face was priceless, and Casey struggled to keep from laughing. One look at Bean cooled his amusement. She was petrified. He needed to keep her calm, but he didn’t quite know how to do it.
Damn! He ran a hand through his hair. Catching Jules’s eyes, he said, “I’ll spell you in a second.”
He heard Jules grumble, “‘bout damn time you got here.”
Casey glared at him but otherwise ignored his comment. Jules didn’t look too calm, and Casey was willing to give him some leeway. Besides, he still cradled Bean in his arms so he couldn’t have been that upset or he would have left the moment Casey arrived.
Before braving the sharp river gravel, Casey kicked off his boots and socks. As he dropped down into the water, he sucked in a breath. Only the determination to be free of sweat made him dunk under the water and run his hands through his hair. He came up for air and had to stifle his swearing. The water was cold.
Jules chuckled, and Casey turned to glower at him.
“You ready to take over?” Jules asked. “I have to take a leak—she probably has to, too. I told her to piss in the river if she needed to but she just turned beat red and ignored me.” He laughed again. “I would have but she was on my lap. Didn’t quite seem right.”
“Go,” Casey told him with a shake of his head. “I’ve got it from here.”
Jules flashed him a grin. Scooting backward, he eased Bean off his lap and stood.
Casey eyed the water dripping from Jules shirt and shorts. “I didn’t see your firearm on the bank.”
Jules rolled his eyes. “Yeah, gave it to Ty. Said he’d put it in my field box in my tent.”
Casey felt mild chagrin at the fact his was laying on the ground next to the slowly forming firepit. “Lock mine up, would you?” he asked with a twitch of his head.
“Will do,” Jules replied. “Going to change, and then I’ll be right back.”
Casey grunted a reply and turned his attention to Bean. He reached for her arm and tugged her into his lap. Her skin was cold and he could feel her shaking. “You just cold, or is it because I’m here?” He assumed it was both, but hoped it was just the chill.
Bean squeaked, and failed to give him a response.
“Was that an ‘I’m cold?’”
She nodded.
Casey put his arms around her and tucked her under his chin, just like Jules had done. With his arms around her, he noted the tension in her back and shoulders, and he could feel movement under the skin of her stomach. “Is that a contraction?”
She shook her head, but with it pressed under his chin, he wasn’t sure of her answer. “Out loud, please?”
“No. Not a contraction.”
“Is that—” he paused. He never felt a baby move before, and a small sense of awe came over him. “—the baby?”
“Yes,” she answered, and then added, “It’s been very still all day and I thought…” Her voice turned raw. “I thought maybe it was dying.”
Casey ran his hand up and down her back and made shushing noises. Her shoulders shook from—he pushed her back enough to look at her—tears. He pulled her close and rocked her. “Having this baby means that much to you?” He was a bit surprised. “Is that why you ran?” When she didn’t answer, he assumed that keeping the child was why she fled St. Louis. Did any of the other women pressed into service feel the same way?
If that was the reason she ran, then this would cause a problem for her. Once he took her back, the baby would be removed from her care and placed in a communal home, its growth and development attended to by the home directors and staff.
But, Casey could give her a few weeks with it, though, passage 8.954DX of the field manual said, “In the unlikely event of a successful non-surgical extraction in the field, the infant and asset are permitted eight weeks before mandatory transport. After time concession is expired, the infant and asset must be returned to the closest city for redeployment. All parties must arrive within acceptable travel parameters. Consult distance table for allotted travel time.” Casey had checked. He could give her ten weeks with the infant.
He sighed and placed his hand more firmly on her stomach. “I was counting the minutes earlier and you’re due for another contraction. Once it is passed, I’ll help you out of the river. Then you need to get dry and I...” Casey trailed off and cleared his throat. He could feel his cheeks warm from embarrassment. “I need to see how, um,” he stalled, “dilated... uh,” he cleared his throat again. His cheeks felt on fire and he was glad he faced away from Tristan, Jules, and Jaesen on the bank. “How far into labor you have progressed.”
She froze in his arms. He was surprised at the ache he felt at her distress. “I… uh… You do realize you have to be naked to deliver. Right?” Casey couldn’t believe how hot his face felt, and he mentally chastised himself. He sounded like an incompetent fool.
Bean nodded. “I know,” she finally answered. She rested her hand against his bare chest. The chill from her fingers shocked him.
“I can send Tristan and Jules away,” Casey told her, but hastily added, “I’d rather not, though.”
When she didn’t respond, he continued, “In case something goes wrong, I’d like to have backup.” After a pause, he said, “And you seem to trust them… some.” He looked skyward for help. He would have been sweating from nerves if not for the fact they sat in a cold river. Smooth, Case. Real smooth...
He was saved from further tongue tied conversation when he felt the skin around her stomach start to tighten. Casey looked down, convinced that any muscle contracting that hard would be visible to the naked eye, but her shirt and the water obscured his vision. It felt intense and he was not surprised when Bean whimpered. He could feel her gritting her teeth and she hissed through the pain.
Casey rubbed his hand over her belly. He was completely at a loss, unsure how to help. At the peak of the contraction, her hands dropped to his forearm and squeezed tightly. Her knuckles whitened from the tension. Her fingers loosened their hold as her pain receded.
“Time to go Bean,” Casey told her and lifted her off his lap. “Tristan?”
“Yeah?”
“Come help.” He wasn’t sure he could hold her steady and stand at the same time. The stones were loose enough that they shifted under their weight continuously.
“Be right there,” Tristan replied. “Just have to put this down.”
Casey heard him moving around on the bank and then a splash of water as he waded toward where they sat.
“Take my hand, Momma,” Tristan said with his hand extended. “I’ll help you up.”
Bean nodded and with Tristan’s assistance she stood. Casey followed her up and took her other arm to help her out of the water. He looked to the fire pit and saw a bedroll set next to the fire ring and the other bedroll was rolled up and set to one end.
“Thought you’d need a backrest,” Tristan answered his unspoken question.
“Good idea,” Casey acknowledged. He turned to Bean and coaxed her to move. “Come on, let us get you comfortable up there.” Her eyes held such fear in their depths. It couldn’t all be from her imminent delivery.
Casey and Tristan helped her up the bank and to the bedrolls. How could he ease her discomfort? There was one thing he could do. “Tristan? Can you make sure the area is clear and then stay back for a bit until I get Bean settled?” He knew she would want as much privacy as he could orchestrate. After she disrobed, he could cover her with a blanket. That way she’d be hidden from casual glances: his included.
Tristan’s voice was subdued when he answered in the affirmative and left Casey’s side to do as he asked.
“Bean?” Casey asked and turned to look at her.
She returned his gaze, her arms around her belly.
So defensive. Casey cupped her cheek in his hand and stepped close to speak to her quietly. “I know you are uncomfortable with me close. This isn’t going to be fun for either of us. If you talked to me, I might be able to help make you more relaxed. But as it stands, all I can do is guess.”
She nodded.
“I need to get you out of these wet clothes,” he told her and the skin around her eyes tightened. He glanced around the clearing. Jules was still in camp and Tristan was out of sight. “It’s just us right now. Do you need help?”
Bean shook her head. Casey really wished she’d talk instead of answering with head nods.
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