Mira needed to shut down these feelings.

She needed to stop looking at Kalmin the way she does. She’s fucking dating Deimos.

But fucking dammit, Kalmin looked so good on the ice.

Sitting on the bleachers, hot chocolate in hand, Mira’s eyes were glued on Kalmin. Kalmin, in his tight shorts and loose hoodie. Kalmin, with his flexible and fit body. Kalmin, who danced on the ice almost erotically. He was grace and power, sprinting down the rink to turn into a beautiful glide with his muscles rippling and sweat glittering. There was so much power in his grace, and grace in his power. Every move he made was deliberate and calculated, to the flicks of his hands, the kick-offs of his feet, the moving of his hips.

It was like he was born to be on the ice.

She knew him as the summer boy, the boy that had the smile of the shining sun, the boy that could make flowers grow. But seeing Kalmin on the ice was a different side she hasn’t seen before. The Kalmin she knew was warm and inviting. This Kalmin was powerful, sensuous and almost cold. He sprinted down the rink with such vigour and danced on the ice with such grace. He was a man with hardened stares, full of concentration. The rink was his own little world, he dominated every inch. He was so forceful and powerful and so everything. If Mira could define masculinity, it would be this.

A man of power, a man of grace. A man that used his power for beauty. A man connected to his emotions, a man connected to his body. A man Mira wished she could be. A man Mira desired.

She bit her lip and shook off the thought. Quickly, she downed her scalding hot chocolate and checked her phone. Her stomach was in knots looking at Deimos’ name in her notifications. She fucking loved Deimos. She’d never be the same without him.

She was just infatuated with Kalmin. She liked the thought of him. She liked him as a friend, maybe a thought in the middle of the night- but that was all. He wasn’t her boy of leather and lace.

She needed to shut these feelings down.

Slowly, Mira got up and approached the rink. She watched him through the plexiglass. Saw his stare meet hers and how his smile melted the ice around him. He skated over, screeching to a stop, ice shavings flying everywhere.

“Ready for round two?” He asked excitedly. Mira smiled weakly.

“You’re not going to let me go alive,” she laughed.

“Just a few more laps around the arena and then we can get ice cream,” he pleaded. His dimpled smile was enough to change her mood.

“So much ice stuff today,” she commented, slipping on her skates. Kalmin waited at the door.

“It’s like it’s winter in here.”

“It does feel like that,” she laughed.

“You cold? You’re only wearing leggings and a tee.”

She shrugged. After cooling off from skating before, she was getting a little cold. Kalmin came prepared, he brought a sweater and was pretty used to the cool temperature enough to swear some baggy shorts.

Kalmin smiled at her and began to unzip his sweater.

“Oh my god, stop,” Mira whined. She cracked an embarrassed smile.

“Let me be chivalrous,” he laughed. “I’ve been skating around this whole time and now I’m warm.”

“You don’t have to,” she shook her head.

“Take it, Mira,” he egged on.

Sighing, she wobbled over with her skates and Kalmin wrapped it around her. She knew she was blushing hard, but she hoped he thought it was just the cold.

“Thanks, buddy,” she mumbled out, slipping it on. It was super long on her, way past her butt. She rolled up the sleeves and zipped it up. It was warm and smelled like him. Coffee, spices, and a hint of musk.

“It might be a little sweaty,” he pointed out.

“No, stop, you’re ruining the cute moment,” she complained. He laughed.

“You can’t handle the truth,” he sneered.

Slowly, Mira entered the rink once again. This wasn’t her domain at all and she forgot everything Kalmin had taught her. Hastily, she reached for the edge of the rink to steady herself, feeling her balance thrown off immensely. Kalmin cheered her on though, showing how to start herself off again and Mira doing it with a quarter of the grace Kalmin had. Skating was kind of like running in heels.

Fuck, now she was thinking of Kalmin in heels.

She needed to shut down these feelings.

Kalmin stretched out his hand and Mira took it immediately. Naturally, they laced together and Mira slid into place with him. He started them off around the rink. Mira kind of understood straight lines now, but was shit at turning. Whenever they approached a corner, Kalmin slowly changed their trajectory so no sharp turns were in her future.

“You’re so patient with me, god, I suck,” she sighed.

“You’re not that bad,” Kalmin pointed out.

“Maybe I just have a great teacher,” she joked.

He sneered at her. “Sensei.”

Mira burst out laughing. “Kalmin-sensei, teach me your ways.”

He laughed like an anime villain and pushed up his imaginary glasses. “Just according to keikaku.”

“I’m fucking dead,” Mira wheezed. Her guts hurt.

He giggled. “If you keep on practising we could go to some great outdoor rinks in the winter.”

Mira laughed. “You think I’m gonna keep on practising?”

“Do it for me, Mira.”

She groaned. “I’ll think about it.”

“We can make a deal,” he suggested. “Eye for an eye?”

Mira glanced over at him and chuckled. “That reminds me of how Deimos and I met,” she sighed, a sweet smile on her face.

“Oh? Do tell, you haven’t told me before.”

“I barfed in his car,” she burst out laughing.

Kalmin joined her. “Oh my god, did you actually?”

She nodded, snickering. “We went to the same party and I was wasted, and he offered- well more like ordered- to drive me home because I was fucking out of it. We make it into his truck and cue me barfing.”

“Holy shit,” he couldn’t stop laughing.

They were approaching another turn and Kalmin easily maneuvered her around it.

“He ended up staying the night nursing my sick ass and I took him out to coffee afterwards,” she sighed. “Spent hours talking about movies.”

“Makes sense,” Kalmin chuckled.

“Afterwards I told him he could have one free pass to have me do whatever he wanted. Kind of deserves the pass, I ruined his whole night. He’s…never used that pass though. Wonder if he even remembers he has that over me.”

“Knowing Deimos, he’d just bribe you of a good dinner date.”

“That does sound like Deimos. I’m gonna ask him sometime about that. Maybe I’ll treat him when he gets home.”

“Miss him?”

“Is it pathetic to say yes?”

“Not at all.”

“Well, yes.”

“I miss him too.”

“You do?”

“We bonded on the trip,” Kalmin chuckled. “And I move fast.”

“Really? You, moving fast?”

“Of course.” He flashed a charming smile. “Like this.”

Suddenly, Mira was yanked and she yelped in surprise. Kalmin upped the pace ten fold and the newbie immediately shut down.

“Kalmin, no, you fucking dick!” She yelled. His laughter echoed in the arena.

Mira’s heart thudded hard against her chest and she kept herself low as possible as she grabbed Kalmin’s hand with both of hers. The speed they were building horrified her and a million different curse words flew out of her mouth. She felt herself tipping. She saw the turn. She shut down.

With a shriek, Kalmin swerved the corner and Mira was jerked around and crumpled into a ball in self-defence. Like a bag of potatoes, she fell and crashed. In some magical feat, Mira had been going so fast she swerved in front of Kalmin and brought him down with her. He tumbled across the ice, landing on his hip, a bubble of a yelp coming out of him. The two of them laid on the ice in utter shock, staring at each other. Kalmin, splayed out like a starfish, and Mira, in a tight ball like an armadillo.

They burst out laughing. No one broke anything but Mira’s dignity.

“I fucking hate you,” Mira said between giggles.

“I didn’t expect you to turn into a bowling ball!” Kalmin wheezed back.

“You expected wrong,” she hissed. 

Deimos woke up to Mira sending photos of her date with Kalmin. Instinctively, he grinned under his sheets, scrolling through them. Most of them were selfies. There was one of them on the bus listening to music, another of them in a cafe getting coffee, when they’re at the rink and afterwards for ice cream. Mira also sent some shots of the beautiful scenery in the quaint little town they visited, which had old miner town-styled lights and signs everywhere. Some shots had Kalmin in it, candid and posed. One picture had him posing with a dog statue, prayer hands and all. Another had him pointing to “Husband Road.” Mira even sent a beautiful shot of an antique store and rainbows shining down on Kalmin’s back when he passed. It also seemed they topped off the day by getting pizza at a small pizzeria and Mira texted that “the chef thought we were dating.”

Deimos laughed and texted her back.

I ship it.

He got up and rummaged around his room for a shirt. Yawning, he started his morning slow, trying to keep his nerves at bay.

Today, Mira was going to meet his mom and sister.

His family took it extremely well at dinner, but he wasn’t so sure about it now. He couldn’t help it, he was always a nervous wreck. Too many things could happen. His mom and sister could take one look at Mira’s overtly masculine demeanour and reject her immediately.

Juno scared him when he was brushing his teeth in the bathroom.

“Hurry up!” She shouted, making him jump a mile. “I wanna meet Mira!”

“Stop, you jerk,” he hissed. “We still have half an hour.”

“I’m excited, I’m finally gonna meet the girl of your dreams.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Hey, c’mon Deimos, I tease you out of love. Not every day a girl likes a boy who likes girl things.”

He sighed and threw his toothbrush into the cup. He knew that. Mira was special.

“Hey, since we do have half an hour, do tell me about her,” Juno pointed out, blocking Deimos’ only exit.

He rolled his eyes. “You’ll meet her soon, god, you’re so annoying.”

“Yes, but I wanna know stuff that’s a little inappropriate to talk about in front of mom.”

Deimos made a face.

“Jesus, no, not that! I don’t care about your sex life, I wanna know what she thinks about your hobbies.”

He paused. Ok, that kind of makes sense. And even though he’ll never admit it to Juno, he did like her company, especially with such a sensitive topic. She was the second person he’d confide about his problems with (number one being Mira of course).

Sighing, he sat down on the toilet, and Juno closed the door and sat in the tub. When they were kids, they’d do this and tell their secrets about each other. No one would enter the bathroom, it was their safe haven. Last time they were in here, Juno was crying about Deimos leaving for Canada.

It was reassuring to know that they could have a better memory now.

“Mira took it well,” Deimos confessed. “She took it stupidly well.”

“With you liking skirts, dresses, jewellery and the whole shebang?”

Deimos smiled softly. “Yeah,” he chuckled and rubbed his neck. “She loves it.”

Warmly, Juno grinned at him. “That’s fucking awesome. I’ve seen some posts from her Instagram. You even wore makeup a few times, that’s rad as hell, little bro.”

“Her friend and roommate is a makeup and nail artist.”

“Shit, that’s tight.”

“It is,” he laughed. “She’s done my manicure a few times, for free.”

“Damn, what I would give to have that,” she sighed. “Deimos, I’m so grateful you’ve got someone who loves you for who you are. That’s why big sis is so excited to see her.”

Deimos sighed. “Yeah, I know.”

“You’ve gone through so much shit, and I haven’t been there enough for you. I’m thankful someone is there for you now,” she said calmly.

He pushed his hair out of his face nervously. He knew he was blushing.

“She’s…cool,” he muttered out.

Juno burst out laughing. “That’s what you always say to things you adore. I remember when you were a little brat and whenever we played dress up you’d always end up saying ‘cool.’”

Deimos groaned in embarrassment.

“Little baby Deimos puts on mom’s pearls: cool. He tries on my school uniform: cool. He tries lipstick horrifically for the first time: cool,” she started listing off.

“First of all, how dare you,” Deimos hissed. “I also said cool to leather jackets and motorcycles.”

She laughed and relaxed against the tub walls, her feet sticking out over the edge. “What a man you turned out to be.”

Deimos looked at her uneasily. “Hopefully…someone you’re proud of?”

Juno looked shocked. Quickly she sat up. “Of course I’m proud of you!” She yelped. “Deimos, you’re living on your own in a foreign country pursuing what you love and have a partner that loves you! You’re living the dream!”

He blushed and covered his face with his hands, groaning into them. “You make it more glamorous than it really is.”

She chuckled. “I’m seriously really happy Mira likes your feminine side as well as your masculine side.”

“I…am too.”

“It’s cool?”

“Shut up, yes it’s cool.”

She chuckled and patted his knee. “So, any other juicy facts I should know about her?”

“She’s…pansexual,” he mumbled.

“Ooo, definitely felt gay vibes off her. Total ladies’…well, lady.”

Deimos laughed. “She’s a definite ladies’ man.”

“Shit, seriously?”

“Lots of girlfriends before me. And…she kind of follows the same hobbies I have. Loves boy clothes. I can wear half her wardrobe.”

“So instead of boyfriend sweaters it’s girlfriend sweaters?”

He smiled. “Yeah.”

“Damn, you guys are destined to be.”

He chuckled and rubbed his neck.

“So this is a serious relationship huh?”

“It kind of is.”

“That’s a first.”

“Yeah…it kind of terrifies me.”

“What? Being together with her?”

He shrugged. “I… I’m just nervous that she’ll leave me. Or I suddenly wake up one day not loving her anymore.”

“Do you love her right now?”

“Yes.”

“Then that’s what matters. If you’re happy now, you’re happy now. If something does happen in the future, then you call me immediately and I’ll solve it. I’ll swim across the ocean to help my baby brother.”

He laughed. “Would you seriously?”

“Of course.”

“Thanks, Juno.”

“You’re welcome, bro.”

They smiled at each other. Sighing, Juno got out of the tub and checked her phone. Her face lit up and she showed off the time.

“It’s eight, let’s start up Skype,” she cheered.

He rolled his eyes. “Don’t embarrass me.”

“No promises!”