Detoxing hurts.

It hurts so badly. When I woke up I was at Jason's home, this was not the apartment but this was the club I knew this room. It was soundproof which is why I figured he brought me here knowing I would need to detox.

I vomited.

I screamed.

I cried.

I begged to die.

But Jason wouldn't let me die, he said I was almost free of the drug. It hurt so bad, the involuntary muscle jerks, the vomiting, the crying. Even though I felt all the pain, I desired the high floating I felt, I wanted the numb.

I left the club, once Jason gave me the green light.

Two nights later, I was desiring that numb, that floating.

I sought out what had been used to give me that feeling, that careless floating.

Heroin.

It was easy to find. I didn't figure it would be so easy to find but in a few alleys from my apartment there is was my newest temptation. The guy explained how to use it and gave it over, I exchanged the money and he gave me the drug. The judgement was nowhere on his face, he seemed to understand just from looking at me.

I all but sprinted back to my house and shot up.

The same feelings shot through me just like the night he drugged me, Only this time I did it to myself. When had I become so careless, when did I stop living.

I changed when that drug became my happy high, my crutch, My addiction.

Buy it.

Shoot up.

Lose time.

Repeat.

Buy it.

Shoot Up.

You can lose a lot of time when you're floating in and out of highness.

I had shot up a lot in two weeks, I had forgotten how much money was pissed away, I couldn't even remember the last time I ate or showered. I was laying on my couch in my current almost always high state, the door flew open but I couldn't even get off the couch.

Jason stood in the doorway.

"What the fuck are you doing, you were supposed to call me days ago."

"ugh, um... I forgot."

Lies, I was too fucking high to care.

"Jesus kid it smells like something died in here when was the last time you took your garbage out or washed your dishes?

He walked into my room and as fast as he walked in there he walked out, he threw the bag on the floor and all but threw me off the couch.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS."

"Gosh, i don't know it looks like drugs."

"YOU ARE COMING WITH ME. WE ARE GOING TO SEE ROW."

Oh god, no.. he would kill me.

"I'm not going anywhere with you, I don't have too."

"you don't have a choice, fucking hell you smell."

"I have a choice----"

"Let's get you changed so we can go."

He pulled my long sleeve shirt off before I could stop him, all the holes in my arms from shooting up showed clearly on my pale white flesh. I felt Jason begin to shake with anger, I didn't want to be here in his arms when he blew.

He slammed me against the wall and I felt the cold metal on my skin, fucking handcuffs.

"I'm taking you to Runes where you can detox again and then you are staying with me, And by fucking god, if I see you high again I'll cut your fucking hands off."

He did what he said he was going to do, he forced me to Runes he made me detox and he took all my stuff to his large home out of the town and told me to stay there.

" Ghost are you even listening to me, I said your shaking really bad."

"I Need It."

"No you don't, You Don't Need The Fucking Drugs."

"Yes, God I need them. So fucking----

Smash.

He threw his laptop in anger right at me, it hit my foot but mostly my toes. I dropped to the floor and cried out in pain. he ran over right away.

"Fuck, Ghost I'm so sorry."

"Give Me My Fucking Drugs."

"Absolutely fucking not."

Jason got in my face and as much as I wanted to punch him, my body had other ideas, I leaned in and kissed him roughly.

"Please..give---"

"When you feel like you need your drugs I will be here, use me until the need goes away. I will make you need me more than your fucking drugs, that I promise."

He touched his lips against mine & picked me up. He threw me on his Cali king bed.

"Sleep, You will feel better when you wake up."