Back to Jude and Leo

Evening came quickly for Jude who went back home after being left out by Neil and Shawn. He had taken a long and warm shower, reflecting on the conversation he had had in the morning with Neil. It wasn’t going well at all between him and Leo, and he would have to say it clearly. He couldn’t stand the distance between them. Jude really loved him, but enough was enough. And if Leo still didn’t listen to him after he spoke to him clearly about what he was feeling, he would have no other choice but to leave their apartment. Until Leo came to realize his mistakes, or forever.

He had turned off the shower after these thoughts and then went to take some clean clothes from the dresser. He had borrowed one of Leo’s black shirts, not that he would notice it was missing anyway, and had put on some white jeans. He had then put on his favourite brown jacket over the shirt, and, of course, his black and white scarf. He had been ready early, so he had started playing some video games to kill some time before leaving to meet his friends for a drink.

Now, he was on his mini, driving to the bar they had agreed on joining at. He stopped at the red light and checked on his messages. None. He sighed and tapped his index finger on the steering wheel as he waited for the traffic light to turn green again. One minute passed. Jude looked outside the window of his car; it was still broad daylight. Summer was near, and he could feel it. The days were warmer and lasted longer, the trees lost their flowers to let juicy fruits grow on their branches, and the birds chirped happily. Finally the light turned green and he turned left at the intersection.

He drove for another ten minutes before reaching his destination: the ‘Destiny Bar’. Jude felt a bit nostalgic as he remembered it was the place where he had met Leo. Well, in this life. Their souls are linked together through time, they would always find each other in all their lives. The world where they first met was far more dangerous and complicated than this one. It was a world where war raged out every single day, until the blessed day when they finally defeated all their enemies. Jude would always remember the relief he felt when taking away the life of the last foe. On that day, they were all freed from their eternal prison. He and Leo could finally live happily, and lived a long life afterwards. They died of old age, not from illness or killed.

And then, they met here, in this town. Leo had just moved from France, he told him, and needed a guide to visit. Jude had instantly recognised the aura surrounding his soul, and hid that fact for a good six months until Leo admitted recognising him too. That night, they had kissed and made love as if there would be no tomorrow. Obviously, when they woke up next to each other the day after, they’d realised it was stupid to act in such a manner as there was far less risks of being killed at this time.

Shaking these memories off, Jude cut the power and got out of his car, then entered the bar. It was still early, but there was already a lot of people drinking at the counter or eating dinner on tables. He knew he had arrived a bit early compared to the time he’d asked the others to come, but he decided not to wait for them before ordering a vodka-cola at the counter. His drink came with a slice of lemon, ice and a straw in less than two minutes, and he immediately started sipping. The taste of alcohol exploded in his mouth like fireworks, and he coughed as it was too strong.

“Don’t take it if you can’t handle it!” he heard a voice say mockingly in his back when he was going to take another sip. Jude turned to face Nick. “Hey!” he finally said while taking a seat next to his friend.

“Hi.” the other replied in a monotone voice.

Nick ordered a mojito and then turned to Jude when he had the drink in his hand.

“Well you sure are glad to see me. I knew I should have declined the offer.”

The other gave him an apologetic look. “I’m sorry. I really am happy you could make it. It’s just that…” he sighed while looking at his drink and played with the straw, turning it into the shattered ice floating at the surface. “Stuff has been happening.”

“Yeah, I can tell.” A few minutes passed when none of them said a word, just sipping on their own drink. Dan ended up joining them, on his own. “Where are the others?” the photographer asked him after giving him a pat on the back when he sat next to him.

“Ash and Tom said they had some ‘business to take care of.’” the guitar player replied, mimicking quote marks with his fingers. “I think I know what they’re really up to though.”

“Yeah, I get the idea, and I don’t want the details, thanks.” Nick told him. Dan ordered a whisky and drank it all in one go before ordering a second one and repeating the same action. “Woah, calm down dude! We’re just starting!” the tanned boy said.

Dan ignored him and ordered a third drink. “By the way Jude, why’d you call us here today? You got somethin’ to talk ‘bout?” he asked the first who came. Nick turned to him too.

“Not really… Me and Leo have some… issues, that’s it. But I just wanted a drink, and I think it’s better to have you guys around rather than being here and depressing all by myself.”

“In that case, you were right to call us here! We can make you forget about your love problems for the night! And speaking of Leo, you told me he worked at a film agency, right?”

Jude furrowed his brows but nodded. “Right,” the other continued, “because I’m looking for a work experience and I was wondering if they needed someone to take photos there?”

Jude thought for a moment, then shook his head. “No, not that I know.” Nick looked disappointed. “But,” the photographer raised his head, “there is a studio next to the place he works at where there are models’ photoshoots, maybe you could go have a look there?”

Nick’s face brightened and he hugged his friend tightly as a way of thanking him. “Thanks a lot!” he said after pulling away from the hug. “Do you have the address?”

“Err, sure thing.” He searched inside his pockets before remembering he changed before coming. “Do you have some paper and a pen?”

“Oh! Yeah, right.” Nick got a piece of paper and a black pen from his blue leather jacket and handed both of them to Jude so he could write the address. The drums player scribbled something on it and then gave him back the paper and the pen. “Cheers mate! You’re a real life saviour!”

Dan chuckled. “Go tell this to those dying to take his lil’ ass over there.” He pointed to a group of guys staring at Jude a bit further into the bar, and the two other boys looked in that direction. Jude ignored them though. “Oh, come on! Give at least one of them a chance! That’s why you’re here, no?”

Jude finished his first drink, ordered a second and replied to Dan. “Should I remind you that I already have a boyfriend?” he sipped from the glass itself this time, chewing on the melting ice. “That’s why I’m here.” he said, showing the alcohol in front of him.

“But you said you had issues.” Nick said. “Why don’t you just chill and do whatever you want? We’re young, let’s party!” He finished his mojito and asked for a bottle of gin.

“Yes,” agreed Jude, “but you being single couldn’t possibly understand what it means to be in a relationship.” He stopped, sipped, and continued, having the other’s attention. He grinned. “It means responsibilities, faithfulness, loyalty. It means respect, and it means being there for the other. Even if one of the two isn’t.”

“Aww man, that’s so not cool. You know what?” he paused to pour himself a glass of gin. “Since you were nice enough to tell me all that shit stuff about relationships, Imma tell you what it means to be young.”

“Go on…” the other gestured.

“Being young means freedom. It means party, but it also means sex. Lots of sex with lots of different partners. That’s what it means to be young!” And to punctuate his sayings, he drank his glass in one go, grimacing at the bitter taste of alcohol on his tongue, and poured himself another one.

Jude shook his head and sipped. “You’d never last in a long, serious relationship.”

“Is that a challenge?”

“No, it’s a fact.”

“Fine then, let’s have a bet.” Jude raised an eyebrow, intrigued, and Nick explained. “Let’s bet that I’ll find someone and keep him as my one and only partner for, let’s say, at least a month.”

The other boy sighed and shook his head. “This is exactly why you’d never last. You’re not considerate of one’s feelings. What if he falls in love with you? You’d have to explain that it was all just a bet, and will break his heart. Forget it already. You’re not cut off for a stable relationship.”

There was a silence only troubled by the music of the bar. “Then, that’s settled.” Nick said after a while.

“What? No! Have you listened to any of what I’ve just said?”

“I have. And that’s why I’ll prove you wrong.”

“Fine then, do what you want. But don’t come crying then and telling me your shit problems because I’ll just tell you ‘I told you’.”

Dan then started talking to them about the new video game he’d started playing, and they were gone for a few hours. Then they danced a bit, and drank some more. After some more time, Jude finished his last drink, paid and let a tip, and stood up from the stool he was sitting on.

“Well then, if you’ll excuse me.”

They said their goodbyes more or less soberly, and Jude headed towards the exit, from where he reached the parking he had left his car at. He hadn’t noticed it’d been that long since he entered the bar, but it was already pitch black outside when he drove back home. He arrived at almost three in the morning, and tried to make as little noise as possible so he didn’t wake the neighbours up.

Then entering the apartment, he saw Leo’s shoes in the closet when he opened it to put his own shoes and jacket. So Leo was back, huh… He hadn’t even sent him a text to tell him he was home, or to ask him where he was at such a late hour of the night. Jude went to the kitchen and poured himself some water to help sober up a little. It was only when he was about to go to the bedroom that he saw.

He saw the plate he had left on the table for Leo to eat when he’d be back. The plate was there, in front of Leo’s seat, untouched. Something shattered inside Jude’s chest as he realized his lover had already ate before coming back home. He left the kitchen and went to the bedroom, dropping on the bed with his clothes still on; he was too tired and maybe also a bit too drunk to get into his pyjamas now.

Closing his eyes, he quickly remembered to tell Leo about Nick’s request the day after. At the moment, he just fell asleep peacefully next to his lover.

...

Jude felt movements next to him and opened his eyes with extreme difficulty. He could see from the slits of his eyelids that it was already the morning, and Leo was preparing himself to go to work. Forcing his body to move, he sat up straight and cleared his throat, waking up at the same time. Leo turned to him and ruffled his hair.

“You should go back to sleep, it’s still early.” he said in a soft voice. As Jude had expected, he didn’t even notice he was wearing Leo’s shirt.

“I have to tell you something first.” Jude said in a resolute tone.

Leo stopped buttoning his shirt and stood in a position to show he was ready to listen. Jude took in a deep breath. “My friend Nick is probably going to pass by the model agency today for a work experience. It would be nice if you could, I don’t know, show him around? Make him comfortable?”

“Jude, you know I’m very busy at work and-”

“Yes, I know.” the brown boy cut. “It was stupid of me to even think about asking.”

Leo ran a hand through his short black hair and sighed. “Maybe I can introduce him to the others, but I can’t promise you I’d do anything else for him, alright?”

Jude nodded and he smiled faintly, then leaned to gently kiss his forehead. While he was doing that, Jude couldn’t help but sniff at the older man’s perfume, unusually fruity, and he frowned imperceptibly. Leo left the bedroom and went to the kitchen. The younger man followed him and saw him heating some coffee in the microwave. He leaned against the wall next to the kitchen door and watched the other man drinking his coffee quickly and then rushing to the closet near the entrance.

Jude watched as Leo was getting ready to leave for another busy day at work, and he did nothing to stop him and make him listen to what he had to say. He watched, powerlessly, Leo put on his black, perfectly waxed shoes and his striped jacket. And he did nothing but reply a quiet “Have a nice day” when Leo, after kissing his cheek, said “I’m off” and left the apartment.

Oh well, Jude would find other opportunities to tell him how he really felt. At least he hoped so…